【下】在你的文化中，有什么是你所鄙视并想要结束的?

Priyam Nayak, Writer at Freelance

Priyam Nayak，自由撰稿人

Force feeding.

强迫进食
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

I am a Bengali married into a Punjabi family and the kind of love harboured by both these communities for food is no secret. Any festival or any cause for celebration triggers a flurry of activities in the kitchen. Multiple course meals are the norm irrespective of whether it is your grandfather’s birthday or a Diwali lunch at your home which shows the expansiveness of your social circle.

我是一个孟加拉人，嫁入旁遮普族，这两个社区对食物的热爱并不是什么秘密。无论是你祖父的生日，还是在家里的排灯节午餐，任何节日或只要有任何庆祝的理由都会引发厨房里一连串的活动。多道菜都是一种常态，这显示了你社交圈的广泛性。

At such gatherings, all the guests are expected to have a bit of everything. By everything, I mean five varieties of appetizers, an ’n’ course meal where ’n’ can be comparable to the number of times you have changed your mobile phones in life. This is culminated with at least three types of dessert. So far so good - one serving is generally manageable unless you have a very small appetite.

在这样的聚会上，所有的客人都会得到一些东西。我所说的一切，都是指五种开胃菜，一顿“n”道菜的大餐，其中“n”可以与你在生活中更换手机的次数相媲美。这是以至少三种甜点为高潮。到目前为止，除非你的胃口很小，否则一份通常是可以控制的。

The problem starts when the host tries to force a second helping of all the dishes down your throat. Your veto powers cease to exist because refusing to binge is considered an affront to the host’s culinary skills. The moment you fend off that lethal ladle-full of greasy butter chicken which is oily enough to fill up an Aramco oil storage tank, you have managed to join the queue of those in your host’s bad books. Most of the times, you will have to gulp down everything that is being served on your plate as a testimony to the ‘athithi devo bhava’ culture in India. The other problematic part of this culture is that the host does not back off even after you have expressed your digestive inability. They will keep on parroting ‘thoda aur’ (little bit more) or ‘ek piece se kuch nai hota (one piece won’t harm you), till your conviction to say no has died down because you don’t want to come across as rude.

当主人试图强迫你吃下第二份菜时，问题就开始了。你没有否决权，因为拒绝是对主人的烹饪技巧的侮辱。当你抵挡住装满油腻的黄油鸡肉的致命勺子时，你已经成功地加入了主人黑名单的行列。大多数时候，你将不得不吞下你盘子里的所有东西，以此来证明印度的“阿提提提德沃巴瓦”文化。这种文化的另一个问题是，即使在你表达了你的有限的消化能力之后，主人也不会退缩。他们会不断地重复“thoda aur”（多一点）或“ek piece se kuch nai hota”（一块不会伤害你），直到你拒绝的信念消失，因为你不想被认为是粗鲁无礼。

This practice of force feeding guests is annoying and a blatant infringement of someone’s choices. If guests want an extra helping, they can pamper themselves without the host having to prod them every few minutes. Not to mention, the complimentary uneasiness that ravages your digestive system for the next few hours.

这种强迫客人吃饭的做法很烦人，公然侵犯了别人的选择。如果客人需要额外的食物，他们可以自己动手，而不用主人每隔几分钟就给他们夹一下。更不用说，接下来的几个小时内，你的消化系统还会受到严重的压迫。

Demetri Braille, studies Bachelor of Science in Computer Science with Honors (2020)

Demetri Braille，计算机科学荣誉理学学士（2020）

One thing I despise about my culture is the amount of money that goes into our weddings.

我反感我的文化中的一件事就是我们婚礼上花的钱。

In my culture, both sides usually have a wedding each. One for each side of the family, but both are similar in concept. Have a huge hall decorated, have a stage, plenty of food and guests, music and loads of ‘rituals’. This can be said for a lot of cultures.

在我的文化中，双方都举办一次婚礼。但两者在概念上是相似的。在很多地区文化中都有这种体现。一个装饰巨大的大厅中有一个舞台，不断放着音乐和进行大量的“仪式” 且有提供充足的食物和客人。

Religion wise, as well as legally, I only need one ceremony to confirm the marriage and it takes less than half a day. There can be light refreshments afterwards and not a lot of people has to come. Maybe ten, if you’re being rebellious to society and culture. But that’s all that’s needed.

在宗教方面以及法律上，我只需要一个不到半天的仪式来确认婚姻，之后会有小点心可以食用。如果你对社交文化有抵触情绪，不需要很多人来，10个人差不多。这就是所有需要的。

Do I want a wedding? No, I do not. I have never wanted a wedding. It is a waste of money that can be used for the potential honeymoon and also the home that we would be living in together; I have strict parents who have strict rules on dating and this makes it hard to even have a relationship. Everything points to weddings/marriage, but we need money for this, don’t we?

我想要婚礼吗？不，我没有。我从来没有想要过婚礼。这是浪费钱，省下来可以用来度蜜月，也可以用来安置我们一起的家。我有严厉的父母，他们对约会有严格的规定，这使得我们甚至很难发生关系。一切都指向婚礼，但婚礼需要钱，不是吗？

It is very contradicting. “You need a wedding to tell everyone that you are married!” Nonsense. We have social media for that. I do not see the point in weddings and even more so at how much a wedding of my culture can cost. I would like a party, if that’s alright. For me and my significant other, we have discussed and agreed that marriage for us is just a certificate (as we do not wish to have children at all) and living together and starting our life together without fear of going on dates, or the lack of fun and adventure just because of strict rules.

这很矛盾。“你需要一个婚礼来告诉所有人你已经结婚了”胡说。我们有社交媒体。我不明白婚礼的意义，更不明白我的婚礼花多少钱。如果可以的话，我想要个派对。我们已经讨论并达成共识，婚姻对我们来说只是一个证书（因为我们根本不希望有孩子）。住在一起开始我们的生活，而不必害怕约会，或者仅仅因为严厉的看管而缺乏乐趣和冒险。

It sucks. It totally does. Why have strict parents who won’t let you date freely, but have them deny marriage even though it is the most religiously accepted way of having a significant other?

这真是太糟糕了。为什么父母严厉不让你自由约会，却又否认最被宗教接受的方式有一个重要的另一半的婚礼？

I would like to put an end to weddings! Or, at least, not make it compulsory to have big weddings, and just have a party with minimal people in it, a private celebration. Money is not worthy to acquire and collect, just for a day’s event! It is not fair to us as a couple, who want to be financially stable and enjoy our money for ourselves, not for people who will judge us and our choices.

我想结束婚礼！至少，不要强制要求举行大型婚礼，而只是举行一个只有很少人参加的派对或者私人庆祝活动。金钱是不值得获得和收集的，只是为了一天的活动！对我们这对夫妻来说，这是不公平的，我们想在经济上稳定下来，自由享受我们的金钱，而不是为那些会评判我们和我们的选择的人。

Miles Negrete, Read a lot of useless books

Miles Negrete, 读了很多无用的书
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

It''s actually a culture I used to be a part of, and it''s less something existing that I despise and more along the terms of a change I want to stop.

实际上我也是文化的一部分，它不是我所鄙视的某种存在，而是我想要停止的一种改变。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

The change I want to stop is the military moving away from physical punishments to paper working.

我想阻止的变化是军队从体罚转向文字记录。

See, when I first started, I got a taste of this: if I screwed up I would be punished with extra tasks like digging fighting holes or carrying heavy obxts or extra physical training or being forced to clean my room until 3 am. The idea was it would be better to sweat the training and learn the lesson now and not in theater. Another part was that the pain, unless it was a permanent injury, would fade with time.

就像当我第一次开始受到体罚的时候，我当时经历是这样：如果我搞砸了，我会受到额外的惩罚，比如挖打斗的洞、搬运重物、额外的体能训练，或者被迫打扫房间直到凌晨3点。当时的想法是，最好现在就花点时间训练吸取教训，而不是在剧院里。伴随体罚的是疼痛，除非是永久性损伤，否则会随着时间而消退。

While I was in they moved away from such punishments and started documenting deficiencies. The problem is that unlike physical punishments is that paperwork will follow you. If you screw up on something, and are paperworked for it, and you go to a meritorious board a month later, you might lose that board for a one time mistake. Or you might be denied a B bullet such as Embassy Duty for being caught drinking underage. So you will get Marines who will either spend the entirety of their enlistments skating under the radar, terrified that they might face lasting repurcussions for simple mistakes, or they try and hide mistakes until they blow up and cause actual harm. And if your are an NCO and don''t want to paperwork them, you can get in trouble for not taking proper action or for hazing.

当我在部队的时候。部队已经从这种惩罚转变为记录不足之处。问题是与体罚不同的是文字记录会一直伴随着你。如果你搞砸了某件事，并为此被做了文字记录，一个月后你去了一个立功委员会，你可能会因为曾经一次错误而失去那个委员会名额。或者你可能会因为在未成年饮酒被抓获而被执行大使馆相关任务。所以你会发现海军陆战队要么在整个服役期间害怕自己会因为简单的错误而面临长期的责难都躲在雷达下，要么就试图隐藏错误直到产生后果并造成实际伤害。如果你是NCO的一员，不想把他们写下来，你可能会因为没有采取适当的行动或欺负他们而惹上麻烦。如果你是一名士官，不想给他们写书面材料，你可能会因为没有采取适当的行动或受到伤害而惹上麻烦。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

Imagine that you are a young Lance Corporal and you and your buddies decide to drink underage. Rather than drinking in the barracks, where you run the risk of your Cpl finding you and punishing you for drinking underage, you go to a friend''s house who lives in town with his wife. Well, they get into a fight and the cops are called and you are all busted for drinking underage. Now, instead of a Cpl yelling at you for being careless and shoving you into a barracks room, you are facing charges and possibly a 6105, which is preventing you from reenlisting.

想象一下，你是一个年轻的下士，你和你的伙伴们都没达到法定喝酒年龄却又决定喝酒。与其在军营里喝酒冒着被上级发现并因未成年饮酒而惩罚的风险，不如和妻子去一个住在城里的朋友家。这时候他们吵架并引来警察，你们都因为未成年饮酒而被捕。现在，你将面临指控并可能还要被文字记录这个档案，而这将阻止你提升职位，而不是上级因为你的粗心大意而对你大喊大叫并把你推进军营。

Or imagine you are a female getting to an infantry unit. Even the mere threat of an accusation of sexual harassment can end a career, so your NCOs keep you at arms length. Any deficiency is documented, so when it comes time for pro/cons to be awarded by your platoon Sgt, you get bellow average because the NCOs simply can''t take the risk of correcting you unofficially.

或者想象你是一个进入步兵单位的女性。你的士兵会和你保持距离怕因为受到性骚扰威胁而导致他们受到惩罚。任何不足都会被记录下来，所以当你的士兵对你投票时，你得到的分数低于平均水平，因为士兵不能承担这些潜在的风险。

It''s a terrible way of doing things. I understand changing it to provide more accountability for NCOs because there were times when Marines were permanently injured during these punishments. But slinging too far in the other direction is just going to cause more problems than it solves.

这是一种糟糕的做事方式。我理解改变它是为了给士官们提供更多的保护，因为有时海军陆战队在这些惩罚中永久受伤。但如果在另一个方向上走得太远，只会带来更多的问题。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

ALSO, FOR THE LOVE OF CHESTY, LET MARINES PUT THEIR HANDS IN THEIR POCKETS.

同时，为了爱护患有胸部疾病的人，让海军陆战队把他们的手放在口袋里。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

Norman Lowe, Business Development Director

Norman Lowe，业务发展总监

The self hate and lack of national confidence we have keenly developed since the end of WWII.

自二战结束以来，我们对自己更加憎恨和对国家越来越缺乏信心

we are deficient without ‘diversity’ and cannot possibly manage to rule ourselves properly - despite centuries of history showing the exact opposite.

尽管几个世纪以来的历史表明如果没有“多样性”，我们就会有缺陷，也不可能管理好自己，而情况恰恰相反。

We have retreated to shallow lives of crass consumerism - or think the answers to our ills lie in utopian fantasies of even more State control. We don’t see the family as the building block of society anymore either.

我们已经回归到粗俗的消费主义的肤浅生活，或者认为我们的弊病的答案在于对国家控制的乌托邦式幻想。我们也不再把家庭视为社会的基石。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

Another thing I despise is the amount of people who have achieved nothing but who feel qualified to lecture and pressure (via getting the State to bully on their behalf) others they disagree with.

我鄙视的另一件事是，很多人一无所成，却觉得自己有资格 (通过让政府代表他们去欺凌)去教训和施压与他们不同意见的人。

Alejandro Bruce
How society automatically assumes the man to be the perpetrator of any sort-of altercation with a woman.

社会是如何自然而然地认为在男人与女人发生任何形式争吵中男人都是肇事者。

Attitudes like these have prevented men from talking about abuse, and in fact straight-up discourage them from doing so for fear of ridicule.

这样的共识阻止了男人谈论虐待，事实上，因为男人害怕被嘲笑而直截了当的态度阻止了他们这样做。

I can not tell you how many times I’ve had people tell me I did something to deserve it when I tried to talk about being bullied by girls.

我不知道有多少次，当我试图谈论被女孩欺负的事情时，人们告诉我，因为我做了一些事情理应受到惩罚。

And let me tell you: this stuff would never be tolerated for a second if you said these things to a girl.

让我告诉你：如果你对一个女孩说这些话，这种事一秒钟都不能被容忍。

This mindset has led to horribly-abusive environments where literally the only choice for the victim is to put up with the abuse, since he’s gonna be the one sent to jail for the crime, the police won’t believe him or take action, or even if they do, she’ll get the prison equivalent to a slap on the wrist.

这种心态导致了可怕的虐待环境，受害者的唯一选择就是忍受虐待，因为他被送进监狱后，警察不会相信他，也没必要采取行动。即使他们这样做，还会得到来自监狱的惩罚。

You should empower women to do good. Not to do whatever they want because they know they can get away with it.

你应该鼓励女性去做善事。而不是做任何她们想做的事，因为她们知道她们可以侥幸逃脱。

Neha Gupta, Teacher

Neha Gupta,老师

Indian parents are way too involved in their kid''s lives. They don''t take off the leash ever and it''s really annoying. Yes…you brought someone into this world but once they are grown…give them the freedom to live their own life. Many parents don''t give their kids enough exposure so these poor grown ups don''t know how to survive on their own even in their 40s which is fckd up. As a parent, it''s not your duty to solve your kid’s each and every problem but to let them face the problem so they can attempt to solve it on their own.

印度父母对孩子的生活太投入了。他们从来不给予他们自由，真的很烦人。是的，你把某人带到这个世界上，但是一旦他们长大了，给他们自由去过自己的生活。许多父母没有给他们的孩子足够的曝光率，所以这些贫穷的成年人甚至在40多岁的时候也不知道如何独立生存。作为一个家长的责任不是解决孩子的每一个问题，而是让他们面对问题，这样他们就可以自己解决问题。

Rae Piste, In progress Computer Science & Arithmetic

Rae Piste，计算机科学与算术进展

I''m half Sri Lankan and half Puerto Rican but I was born in America and I''m American……..but when people ask me where I''m from I tell them “I''m half South Asian and half Hispanic”…….and then they ask me if I''m Chinese or if I''m Mexican….but what I hate the most is when they ask if I''m “ghetto” because I''m Hispanic or is I''m “smart and get good grades and shit” because I''m Asian……pls stop with the stereotypes guys…..I am smart but I still want people to stop assuming I know everything because I''m South Asian…..or that I “deal the good shit cheap” because I''m Hispanic…….

我有一半斯里兰卡血统，一半波多黎各血统，但我出生在美国，我是美国人。但当人们问我来自哪里时，我告诉他们“我有一半南亚血统，一半西班牙血统”。然后他们问我是中国人还是墨西哥人。但我最讨厌的是，当他们问我是不是来自“贫民区”，因为我是西班牙人或者因为我是亚洲人，所以我“聪明、成绩好”。请停止这些刻板想象。我很聪明但我还是希望人们不要以为我是南亚人就什么都知道。或者因为我是西班牙人，就被认为是“廉价处理的东西”

Dale Garland, Retail Sales, Commission & Straight, Asst. St. Mng (1975-present)

Dale Garland,零售，零售，佣金和直营，助理St.Mng（1975年至今）

How free and loose the U.S. is about sex. It’s created several diseases, unwanted pregnancies, split relationships, an entitlement attitude, etc. If we all concentrated more on loving the soul, the mind, the personality, etc., then we may not have as many divorces and all of the other things I’ve mentioned.

美国对性的态度是自由和放任的。它造成了一些疾病，意外怀孕，分居关系，权利态度等等。如果我们都更专注于爱灵魂，思想，人格等等，那么我们可能不会有那么多离婚和所有其他我提到的事情。

Hollywood and society, in general, peddle it out like an addictive candy and we just eat it up and get fat on it. But we live in a free society under God’s free will, so we have the choice to screw up our lives, and frequently do so, for a moment of temporary pleasure instead of a longer-lasting love. If only we used the…BIG head more often.

一般来说，好莱坞社会就像一块上瘾的糖果一样，我们只是把它吃光然后发胖。但我们是生活在上帝的自由意志下的自由社会中，所以我们为了暂时的快乐而不是更长久的爱而选择去破坏我们的生活。如果我们能经常用大脑就好了。

Mahinthan So (மகி), I love history and geography

Mahinthan So (மகி), 喜欢历史和地理

While it’s common for every one we Tamils have many steps above others in-term of addiction to ethnicity and Language.

我们泰米尔人对种族和语言的依赖程度比其他人高很多。

Many Tamils think Tamil is the oldest language and oldest culture in the world. They seldom try to learn from other cultures.

许多泰米尔人认为泰米尔语是世界上最古老的语言和文化。他们很少尝试学习其他文化。

While Tamils is one of the oldest culture and living language that doesn’t mean we are superior to every one else.

虽然泰米尔语是最古老的文化和最古老的语言之一，但这并不意味着我们比其他任何人都优越。

Ruqqy Shah, Telemarketing Executive

Ruqqy Shah，电话营销主管

The dowry system, the thing that the girl''s family has to make all the expenses on wedding and the groom''s family only takes. Greediest. And one mistake and she''s sent back to her home, though the groom can have a girlfriend as a side satisfaction.

嫁妆制度，女孩的家庭必须支付婚礼和新郎家庭所需的一切费用。最贪婪的。还有只要有一个做的不好的地方，她会被送回娘家，尽管新郎可以允许有一个女朋友作为满足。

I wish I could put an end to the fact that a woman cannot propose a man.

我希望我能结束一个女人不能向男人求婚的事实。