遇到诈骗电话的时候,除了挂断之外你还做过什么?
2021-05-27 Kira_Yoshikage 12602
正文翻译

What is something you say to scammers instead of hanging up?

遇到诈骗电话的时候,除了挂断之外你还做过什么?

评论翻译
Lakanooky
I give them a phone number one digit at a time and ask them to repeat it as a whole after each one. Then tell them they got it wrong when I'm done and start over

我会一位数字一位数字地给他念电话号码,然后每念一位数字就让他完整地念一遍。最后等我全念完之后告诉他号码不对,再重新来一遍。

Prize_Entry1064
I do this but with “my name”

我也这么干,只不过我的是“我的名字”。

AnalProlapse666
Tell me "your name" Is like mohhamed abdullah ibrahim. And they just give up after the second

您确定“您的名字”是穆罕默德阿卜杜拉易卜拉欣吗。然后他们基本上下一秒就挂电话了。

alexandicity
"Oh hang on, let me get the , they'll be able to help you!"

“哦等一下,让我把电话给(老婆/老公/家长/合适的做决策的人),他们应该能帮得上你!”

Then just turn the microphone off and go about my day.

然后把麦克风关了接着该干啥干啥。

ErieTempest
I've done this and handed the phone to my kids (when they were toddlers) before, too.、

我之前也这么做过,然后我把我的电话给了我家孩子们(当时他们还是婴儿)。

pinkerly
I use to let them talk to my daugter when she was 2 all the time. She thought it was the best thing in the world."One moment, I'll get the lady of the house for you right now." "Heeeyyywooo??"

我以前让他们跟我的两岁女儿说。她还觉得那是世界上最有趣的事情。“等一下,我把电话交给我家负责的女士。”“歪——?”

Cgaan
Someone scam called my wife once, saying they would call the police on her for all the awful things she's done, I grabbed the phone, said "Don't worry, I've got the sheriff of this town on the phone" I handed the phone to my 1 year old and without missing a beat he goes "DADADADADAAAA AYDYA AWOOOO!!!" And handed the phone back. I've never been more proud.

有人给我老婆打过诈骗电话,跟他说他们要为她之前做过的各种各样的烂事给警察打电话。我把电话拿过来,说“别担心,我马上就把电话交给我们市的警长”,我把电话放到我一岁大的儿子手里,他毫不犹豫地开始“哒哒哒哒哒啊打——啊呜!!”然后把手机交还给我。那是我最自豪的一刻。

1Allnighterforanime
Your kid is going to be successful I'm telling ya

你家孩子是一定会很成功的,我告诉你。

Smashing_stuff
"Mr.Smashing Stuff, I'm calling about an accident you were involved in that wasn't your fault"

“Smashing Stuff先生,我给你打电话是关于之前你卷入的一次事故,那不是你的错”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


"Oh it wasn't an accident, I meant to hurt those people."

“哦,那不是事故。我就是故意要伤害那些人的。”

Darkangel_82
I laughed out loud, that's brilliant

我笑的很大声,这个太棒了。

justking1414
The devil told me to purify them with fire

恶魔告诉我要用火焰净化他们。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


ismekatie
Heavily flirt

使劲儿调情。

arcanum7123
breathes shakily keep talking

颤颤巍巍地呼吸,然后继续讲话

ismekatie
Haha, I have gotten overly sexual with a few of them just for fun lol

哈哈,我曾经单纯为了好玩儿跟几个骗子搞得很色情

Casual-Notice
No-no...tell me. How loooong is your warranty?

不,不……告诉我,你的保险有多——长?

Is it...all inclusive?

那个……全都能包❤住吗?

Shas_Erra
Instructions unclear, now getting married next month

指示没弄明白,现在下个月要跟骗子结婚了

ZGRawr
Just treat them like a full on sex line. Have actually gotten one to apologize for calling and promise he would never call me again.

就把他们当成打色情电话的。曾经真的有一个跟我道歉,并且保证以后再也不会打给我。

beardimus_maximus
I obcr told one that I wanted him to smear peanut butter on my balls and lick it off. He hung up pretty fast.

我有一次跟某个骗子说我想要他把花生酱抹到我的蛋上,然后舔下来。他挂的很快。

anusthrasher96
My dad used to get a lot of Viagra salesman. So he pleads with them to stop sending free samples because he's too hard all the time and can't live his life.

我爸以前经常接到很多伟哥推销员的电话。于是他求他们别再寄免费小样过来,因为他从早硬到晚,连日子都过不下去了。

Chengweiyingji
“Ah, I’m so glad you called. Your free sample is great! However, it’s been four hours now and I’ve been wondering... how do I get it, y’know, down?”

“啊,你能打电话过来真是太好了。你送的免费样品很棒!但是已经过了好几个小时了,我在想啊……我怎么让它,就,下去?”

Odin_Allfathir
"So, what is your password?" "Kyarewthu. Big K, small cyrylic Ya, Polish ew, Icelandic eth, Turkish dotless i. No bot will ever brute force this."

“那么您的密码是?”“Kyarewthu。大写的K,小写的西里尔字母ya,波兰语的ew,冰岛语的eth,土耳其的没有点的i。根本不可能有机器人能暴力破解这个密码。”

Wild-Cat15
Scammer: "Oh you mean Kяłðı? Is that correct?"

骗子:“哦你说的是Kяłðı?对吧?”

Fortanono
Not entirely a horrible idea--I'm sure it's more secure than most passwords of that length, although you would want to make it longer for more security. Dunno how many websites would accept those characters though.

其实也不算是很糟糕的主意——我很确定这比绝大多数这个长度的密码都要安全,尽管为了更安全一点你会想要让密码更长一点。但我也不知道有多少网站会接受这些字符。

hitforhelp
I ask them to confirm my information for security purposes. Breaks their scxt and they don't know what to say!

我让他们为了安全确认一下我的个人信息。这打乱了他们的剧本,让他们都不知道该说什么!(译注:美国的诈骗电话好像不是先搞到受骗者的个人信息再骗,而是骗他们的个人信息。)

dancingcop7
Ooooh man I got the ‘you have $120,000 in debt on your credit card account’ call once a while back. First question I asked, ‘who’s name is on the account?’ They actually called me a fucking asshole for asking! So I just kept asking for the name on the account until they hung up.

噢噢哥们我好久之前接到过“您的信用卡账户上有12万美元的欠款”的电话,我问的第一个问题是“这个账户的主人姓名是什么?”他们因为我问了这个问题骂我是傻逼!所以我就一直问账号的名字,直到他们闭嘴。(译注:感觉他们这个电信诈骗的水平也不咋地的样子……)

victoriouscissorkick
I just agree and say yes to almost anything, usually get you into the sales speech and eventually something like "So how many windows does your property have?" Me - "Yes". etc etc. Usually they just hang up.

我就一直同意,他说什么我都说对,通常来说都能让他们说完销售话术,然后问“所以您家的房产有多少扇窗户?”,我:“对”。之后他们通常就挂电话了。
(译注:这种问多少扇窗户的诈骗电话,似乎是为了确认那种住大豪斯的美国家庭的房子长什么样子,他们还会询问包括“你家房子的颜色是?”“你家有没有力气大的人?”“你什么时候不在家?”之类的,之后很可能进行入户抢劫)

Vicous
"So how many windows does your property have?"

“所以您家的房产有多少扇窗户?”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


"Yeah."

“对。”

"Well how many?"

“呃多少扇?”

"How many what?"

“多少扇啥啊?”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


"Windows."

“窗户。”

"What about them?"

“窗户咋啦?”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


"How many do you have?"

“您有多少扇?”

"Oh I'm homeless."

“哦我没有家。”

"Okay sir."

“好吧先生。”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


scammer hangs up

骗子挂了

spunkymynci
Hi there, and thanks for calling Cardiff Aquarium. Please be aware your call may be recorded for training porpoises.

您好,感谢致电加的夫水族馆。请注意,您的通话内容可能被录制以供训练使用。

ImTheGreatLeviathan
I tell them my name is Billy Madonna, and I drive a '93 Toyota Paseo. Then i start getting pissed when they tell me they actually CAN'T give me an extended warranty on my car.

我跟他们说我叫比利·麦当娜,开一辆93年的丰田Paseo。当他们说他们实际上不能给我的车上延期保险的时候我就开始生气。

I mean, why can't you?! YOU called ME, and the machine SAID I could get an extended warranty. THAT IS FALSE ADVERTISING! LET ME SPEAK WITH YOUR SUPERVISOR!

你凭什么不能啊?!是你给我打的电话,还亲口说我能获得延长保险。你这是虚假广告!让我跟你们的上司说两句!

UnoriginalMike
I can’t drive anymore

我再也不能开车了

Why not?

为什么不行?

Judge said I’d go to jail if I ever drove again after all my DUIs and running over that family.

法官说假如我醉驾这么多次又把那一家人碾死之后要是再开车就得进监狱了。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


Keep making up atrocities until they hang up.

一直在那里编造我的罪行,直到他们挂电话。

JanusIsBlue
“Hi sorry this is my work line, so I don’t take personal calls on here! Here’s my home phone: insert phone number of other known scammer/other prank call number here call me there later and we can talk!”

“您好,不好意思这是我的工作电话,所以我不会接个人电话!这是我家里的电话:(别的诈骗电话号码)请晚点给我打电话,我们好好聊一聊!”

Works better for texting based scams, but would probably work for calls too

短信诈骗更方便,但电话说不定也可行。

blaedmon
I've put them on hold before. As if I'm working in a call centre. Had a guy on hold for 5 or so minutes it was quite ridiculous that he stayed on the line.

我以前让他们一直等着,就好像我在接线中心工作。有个人等了我五分钟,他一直在线还挺搞笑的。

runawayslave69
I can guarantee he probably appreciated the free break

我保证他绝对很感激你送他的免费休息。

thebeautifulseason
This is what my grandfather used to do. "Hello? Oh, hmm, let me get my wife..." Wouldn't hang up, just set the phone down and went back to watching golf.

我祖父就喜欢这么做。“喂?哦,嗯,我给我老婆……”不挂断,就把电话放下,然后回去接着看奥尔夫。

Roaming_Pie
Depends on the scam call.

取决于是什么诈骗。

Recently I’m getting a lot of “we’re calling in regards to your recent car accident”

最近我接到了很多“我们希望聊聊您最近的一起车祸”的这种电话。

I relied with “how dare you! I died in that accident!”

我回他说“你怎么敢!我都被撞死了!”

spaceplanepilot2
Or a “my son and wife died in that accident!” (then start to sob and if they have a heart they’ll hang up and apologize)

或者来一句“我的儿子和老婆都在那场事故中去世了!”(然后开始假哭,假如他们还有点良心他们就会把电话挂了道歉)

bowdown2q
if they had a heart they wouldn't be trying to steal your money.

假如他们还有点良心他们就不会偷你的钱了。

modi13
"My wife and son died in that crash!"

“我的老婆和儿子都死在那场车祸里了!”

"Oh, that's awful. We also sell funeral packages."

“哦,这太糟糕了。我们也做葬礼服务。”

modi13
they’ll hang up and apologize

引用:他们会把电话挂了道歉
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


That seems counterproductive

这就不够有生产力了

OMG_A_CUPCAKE
"So I take it that you are now interested in hot singles in your area?"

“所以我猜你现在对你附近的性感单身女性有兴趣?”

USA_A-OK
Those are the ones I act shocked and say "shit, I thought no one would find the body" to

这种电话我会假装很诧异,然后说“操,我以为没人会发现尸体”

_cosmicomics_
“Oh, that wasn’t an accident. Thanks for your concern, though.”

“哦,那不算一场事故。但多谢你的关心。”

Rob-With-One-B
My approach is, “I’d only drunk eight pints!”、

我的方法是“要是我只喝了八品脱就好了!”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


mr_ji
"I already paid what you asked and didn't say anything to the cops. Are we going to have a problem?"

“我已经交了你要的那份钱,我也什么都没跟警察交待。你是想找麻烦吗?”

spyroism
To this call I normally commend them on their Intel, cause I am standing next to the smoldering wreck as we speak. They normally worry as it takes time off scxt and soon hang up after I give them details of the fictional scene.

对于这种电话,我通常都会评论一下他们提供的细节,因为我假装自己就站在冒烟的汽车残骸旁边。他们通常会有点担心,因为离开剧本即兴表演总是要花点时间的,在我给他们这个虚拟场景的细节之后不久,他们就会把电话给挂了。

slightfootproblem
I did a similar thing and told him I lost my legs, kept it going for just over 10 minutes with my work mate laughing in the background. I told him we drove off a cliff. He called me a cunt and hung up.

我也做过类似的事,我跟他们说我两条腿都断了,瞎说了有十分钟,同事在背景里一直笑。我跟他说我们把车开到悬崖下头去了。他说我是个婊子然后把电话挂了。

Nethervex
"Just to let you know, by law I'm required to inform you that this is a premium phone line that will be billed directly to your provider. By calling here you agree to accept all charges."

“我得提前说一句,按照法律我必须通知你这是一条高级电话热线,会直接从您的电信供应商那里收费。往这里打电话就意味着你同意所有的费用。”

Something like that not only gets them to hang up, but they tend to stop calling me after that.

这种话不止会让他们挂电话,还会让他们以后也不给我打。

BeerGardenGnome
My mother is older and retired for some time now. She makes a game out of screwing with them. She kept one calling from “Microsoft” going for a good 20-30 minutes having them try to direct her to install something. She just kept playing dumb and asking them to explain what they meant or to describe what she should be looking for. At the end she drops, “do you think I’m having trouble finding ‘Start’ or ‘Windows’ because I’m on a Mac?” And then just laughs and told them she’d be wasting their time on purpose. I think she said she was cooking or something like that the whole time.

我妈妈已经老了,退休了有一阵子。她很喜欢捉弄这帮骗子玩。她让一个“微软”打来的电话跟她聊了二三十分钟,电话那头想要让他安装什么东西。她就一直装傻,问他们说的是什么意思,或者描述一下她应该找什么东西。最后她来一句“你们觉不觉得我找不到‘开始’按钮或者‘Windows’有可能是因为我用的苹果系统啊?”然后一边笑一边告诉他们她是故意浪费他们的时间。我记得她说她是一边接电话一边在做饭还是什么的。

Other times she will just keep telling them they’ve got a bad connection and asks them to keep repeating themselves at which time she blows this shrill high pitched whistle into the phone while they try and talk. Wash rinse repeat until they hang up.

还有一些情况,她会跟他们说他们信号不太好,让他们再重复一遍,然后在他们说话的时候,她冲着话筒吹那种音调非常高的口哨。不断重复,直到他们挂电话。

My dad passed away more than a decade ago and when he was pretty much stuck at home towards the end he’d screw around with them and sit and give them incorrect credit card numbers and shit until they caught on. I called a lot then to check in on him and on more than one occasion he switched lines to grab my call and he’d say, “I wonder if they’ll still be on hold when we’re done taking?”

我父亲十多年前去世了,在他还在的时候他基本上出不去家门,那时他也会跟骗子们纠缠,比如告诉他们不正确的信用卡卡号之类的,直到他们发现。我当时会给他打不少电话,不止一次他都是切过来接我的电话,然后说“你说他们会不会等到我们聊完天啊?”

Don’t get me wrong my parents are generally not malicious people. Quite the opposite actually. They just have some kind of particular axe to grind with telemarketing and scammers as they got to their older ages. When I was a kid it was always a polite, “no thank you”

别想多了,我父母本质上不是什么坏人。正好相反。他们只是老了之后对电信诈骗和电话销售特别看不顺眼。在我还小的时候他们也只是礼貌地说一句“不用谢谢”。

Rovden
Modern attitude about the phone scammers is the longer you have them on the phone, the less time they get to scam someone else. It's a public service now.

现在对电话诈骗的人的态度是,你在电话上耽误他们的时间,他们去骗别人的时间就越短。现在这算是公共服务了。

special-spork
Play along for as long as possible, just giving them fake details. You can tell the frustration slowly builds but they're still trying to be all nice and helpful

陪他们玩,越久越好,给他们各种假的信息。你可以察觉到他们在缓缓地积累起困惑感,但仍然扮出一副温柔愿意帮忙的样子。

pixie13903
A friend of my father did this. They told him there was a virus I'm his computer and he had to get to it immediately. So for idk 20 minutes or more he was just standing there going "uh huh, yeah yeah," and pretending he was actually doing stuff with his computer. Then by the end of it he goes "oh I don't have a computer". The scammer lost his shit at him calling my dad's friend a scammer.

我爸爸的朋友就这么做。他们说他的电脑里有个病毒,需要立刻清除掉。所以有那么二十分钟吧,他就站在那里“嗯哼,好的好的”假装他在操作电脑。然后到最后他说一句“哦我没有电脑”。骗子气得骂我爸爸的朋友是骗子。

Wheredidmyballsgo
when the scammer calls you a scammer, you know you're doing shit right

当骗子说你是个骗子的时候,你就知道你做了正确的事情。

rarestereocats
One of my roommates did this. Got a call from "Windows Support", so he pretended to be an old man who didn't understand how computers worked. He strung them along with fake details and made them explain everything to him step-by-step. He wasted a little over two hours of their life. Call ended when my roommate told them he was using Windows XP and the scammer angrily told him that he needed to throw the computer away.

我有个室友就这么做。从“Windows支持中心”接到了个电话,他就开始假装自己是个不懂电脑的老人。他用假的细节遛他们玩儿,让他们一步步地把所有细节都给他解释一遍。他浪费了生命中的两个多小时。最后室友跟他们说他在用WindowsXP,骗子愤怒地跟他说他该把那个破电脑扔了,然后把电话挂了。

supervillain9
I do this too. Use my fake old man voice and make them go through their instructions but pretend I don't understand and make everything as long as frustrating as possible.

我也会这么做。假装自己是个老人,让他们一步一步地指示我,但假装我什么都不懂,让每一步都尽量让他们困惑。

SGMedi
I do this with CRA scammers, I play along until they tell me how much cash they need, then I give them an address for a meet up which is a local police division and tell them that I'm the guy behind the desk.

我会跟假装自己是加拿大税务局的骗子这么做。我一直配合他们,直到他们跟我跟我说他们需要多少现金,我给他们一个碰头的地址,实际上是当地的警局,然后跟他们说我是坐在桌子后面的那个。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


dartistic
I did this as well, and when I finally told them I knew this was BS all along, and I had in fact been sitting on a Mac the whole time not Windows, they said "But we are Apple also!".

我也这么干过,等到我最后告诉他们我知道从头到尾都是骗人的,我事实上一直都坐在苹果电脑前面而不是Windows的时候,他们说“但我们也管苹果的!”

Casual-Notice
"Hello, sir. This is the Microsoft offices. We're calling to inform you that your computer is infected with a virus."

“您好,先生。这里是微软办公室。我们打电话是为了通知您您的电脑感染了一种病毒。”

"My computer?"

“我的电脑?”

"Yes, sir. And if you do no take steps to correct it we will be forced to shut down your system remotely."

“没错。假如你不按照规定步骤去纠正的话,我们将不得不远程关闭您的电脑。”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


"Which one?"

“哪个?”

"What?"

“啥?”

"Which computer? I have a couple."

“哪个?我有好几台电脑。”

"The one running Microsoft Windows."

“运行微软Windows系统的那个。”

"They all run Microsoft Windows."

“它们都运行微软Windows系统。”

"Yes, well, I am showing they are all infected." (you can literally hear him salivate.)

“好,呃,我的意思是他们都被感染了。”(你都能听见他在流口水。“

"So you're monitoring my systems right now?"

“所以你在监视我的所有操作系统?”

"Yes."

“没错。”

"Despite the fact that doing so is a violation of multiple federal laws?"

“而你知道这么做违反了多项联邦法律?”

Skhmt
I do something similar, but instead of talking about violating federal laws, I say "Oh, so you're monitoring all the computers on this US Army installation? I thought we had our own IT specialists that do that..."

我也会做类似的事情,但我说的不是违反联邦法律,而是“哦,所以你在监控这个美国陆军设施里的所有电脑?我以为我们有自己的IT专家负责这件事……”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


I don't work on an army base.

我不在任何军事基地工作。

ChangeTheFocus
When I'm not feeling creative, I just tell the truth.

在我没什么创意的时候,我就干脆说实话。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


SCAMMER: You bought tech support from us last year.

骗子:您去年从我们那里购买了技术支持服务。

ME: No, I didn't.

我:不,我没有。

SCAMMER: Yes, you bought our tech support package. It's about to expire.

骗子:不,您购买了我们的技术支持服务。并且快要过期了。

ME: There isn't anything to expire.

我:没什么要过期的。

Etc. They're not supposed to hang up, so they try for a long time before finally giving up. I regard wasting their time as a minor public service.

等等。他们本来是不应该挂电话的,所以他们会在我身上浪费很多时间才放弃。我想浪费他们的时间或许算一种小的公共服务。

SaberToothGerbil
I do the same with the "Your car's warranty" people.

我对“您车辆的保险”的骗子也这么做。

ME: oh, which car?

我:哦,哪辆车?
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


THEM: What kind of car do you have?

他们:您有哪种车?

ME: I have a couple, which were you talking about just now?

我:我有两三辆。你刚才说的是哪辆?

THEM: We work with any car.

他们:我们什么车都行。

ME: No, you called me about my car, you said the warranty was expiring. Check your list there, which car are you talking about? This isn't a scam is it?

我:不,你刚才说的是我的车,你说的是保险要过期了。看看你的列表,你说的是哪辆车?这不是诈骗对不对?

Its_Juice
I learned they hang up immediately if you say a really exotic car or something really old.

我发现假如你说一辆特别贵的跑车或者一些特别老的车,他们会立刻挂电话。

tinymonesters
Not always. I was like yeah I have a 2023 BMW M4...They didn't even hesitate about me having a fucking future car...

也不一定。我当时说对我有辆2023年的宝马M4,他们甚至都没对我有一辆未来的车感到犹豫……

J-Sixhoej
I sometimes try to sell them stuff. I once spent 45 minutes on a slow day at work trying to sell a 120 kg vibrator to some dude.

我有时会试着给他们推销东西。我曾经在没什么工作的工作日花了45分钟给某人推销一个120公斤的振动器。(译注:振动器和震动棒是同一个单词,所以……)

LifeBeFlimsy
Hi, American here. And from my knowledge of the metric system 1 kg = 2.2lbs, therefore 1 2 0 K G is over 260lbs. What fucking vibrator were u selling? Who was it built for? King Kong's mother?

嘿,我是美国人。根据我对公制单位的知识,一公斤=2.2磅,所以120公斤就是260多磅。你们卖的是什么震动棒啊?给谁用的?金刚他妈?
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


wrinkled_nutsack
An all-American 6.0L HEMI V8 powered TickleMaster™

一个纯粹美国制造6.0升克莱斯勒HEMI V8发动机驱动的痒痒大师™
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


nano_wulfen
Does that come with the turbocharger?.....asking for......a friend.

带涡轮增压吗?……替我……朋友问。

J-Sixhoej
It's a vibrator for stabilizing dirt not a fucking dildo..

那是用来把脏土压平的,不是他娘的假屌……

tillstymmelse
Dude, you gotta stop calling my mom dirt!

兄弟,不许骂我妈妈叫脏土!

BigBear4281
Okay, but stay with me... I feel like there is an untapped market for 260lbs dildos...

好吧,但您别挂……我感觉260磅的假屌还是有市场的……

Crypto7899
I usually pretend to be an answering machine

我通常会假装自己是个自动应答机

PlantsAreEverything
I pretend to speak robot and only converse with beeps and boops. For example:

我会假装自己是个会说话的机器人,但只用滴滴嘟嘟回答。比如:

Me: Hello?

我:您好?

Scam Call: [random scam tactic]

诈骗电话:(诈骗内容)

Me: BOOOOOP

我:嘟——

Scam Call: uhh...hello? Miss?

诈骗电话:呃……您好?小姐?

Me: BEEEEEEeeeep beepbeep

我:滴——滴滴滴
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


Scam Call: mumbles wtf...

诈骗电话:小声说我草……

(continue conversing in robot tones until they give up)

(继续以机器人的声音对话直到他们放弃)

It’s worked every time but once. One time the scammer thought I was a kid and kept asking me to give the phone to my Mommy or Daddy. That time, I had to hang up. Every other time they get annoyed or frustrated and hang up.

只有一次不管用,那次骗子以为我是个小孩,一直让我把电话给我爸爸或者妈妈。那次我不得不挂电话。剩下的每次他们要么是气到不行要么是搞不懂,然后自己把电话挂了。

This is fantastic for me for three reasons:

对我来说这种方法很棒,因为三点:

I find it highly amusing and it takes no brain power. It’s my own fun game to see how long they’ll endure the noises. It’s usually not long.

我觉得这特别好玩,并且不用走脑子。看他们能忍受多长时间的噪音是我自己的游戏。通常都坚持不了太久。

If you’re at a social event, answer a call, and speak in beeps and boops it is highly entertaining for others.

假如你在社交场合,接了个电话,然后用哔哔叭叭来回答的话,其他人也会觉得很有意思。

I’m a grown-ass woman in her 40s. Rarely do I get a chance to speak complete nonsense and just make funny noises so it always makes me smile. Highly recommended.

我是个40多岁的老女人了。我很少有机会说彻头彻尾的废话,或者发出搞笑的噪音,所以这样总能让我笑出来。非常推荐。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


atomjohn
Scammer was Indian, I'm Indian, I put on my Indian accent then accused him of putting on a bad fake Indian accent to make fun of me and told him he should be ashamed of himself. It was a few seconds of fun.

骗子是个印度人。我也是个印度人,我换上我的印度口音,然后骂他学我的印度口音来取笑我,告诉他应该感到羞耻。有那么几秒钟还挺有意思的。

tantalizingGarbage
i wisper into the mic to make them turn the volume on their headsets up then suddenly start yelling

我对麦克风说悄悄话,让他们把自己的耳机音量调大,然后我突然开始大叫

Nursultan_Tulyakbay_
shouting in Arabic mostly get them pretty scared

用阿拉伯语跟他们大喊通常会把他们吓到。

Obvious_Bookkeeper27
Same with Russian, I'll usually say, "Hello?" And then when they take even a second too long to answer I start shrieking at them. "Who are you? What do you want?! Why do you waste my time?!" They usually hang up immediately after that.

用俄语也差不多。我通常会说“您好?”,然后假如他们回答得慢了哪怕一秒钟,我都开始对他们尖叫。“你谁啊?你想干啥?为什么要浪费我的时间?!”他们通常会立马把电话挂了。

rainbow84uk
Haha I used to do the same in English when I lived in Mexico. Answering Spanish-speaking scammers with "YES??? WHAT DO YOU WANT??" usually made them hang up. If not I'd just leave the phone on the counter until they got bored and ended the call.

哈哈哈我住在墨西哥的时候也经常会用英语这么做。用“啊?你要干啥?(英语)”回答那些讲西班牙语的骗子通常会让他们立刻挂断。假如他们不挂的话,我会把电话扔在柜台上直到他们自己把电话挂了。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


Alex_Madnesso
“911 what’s your emergency?”

“这里911,您的紧急情况是?”
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


NoOneShallPassHassan
"Is this what you wanted to be when you grew up?"

“这就是你小时候希望自己长大之后要做的事吗?”

Herrthrowaway1975
OUCH. That one probably hurts some.

哦。这句话很可能会伤到某些人。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


FilledwithTegridy
I only do this if I'm at home...I scream. They stop talking..when they start talking again I scream again. "Sir are you okay?!" "I'm taking a shit and I swear it's coming out sideways! Oh god please keep talking it helps!" Then repeat steps one and two until they hang up.

我只会在家的时候这么干……我会尖叫。他们就不说话。等到他们再张嘴的时候,我就接着尖叫。“先生您没事吧?”“我在拉屎,我草我要拉到马桶外头去了!我草请继续跟我说话,很有帮助!”然后重复前两部,直到他们自己挂电话。

Q_and_C
Continually say “Hello? Is anyone there? Can you speak up?” until they hang up. I always hope after the call they troubleshoot their headphones / mic and spend less time calling others.

一直说“你好?有人吗?能大点声吗?”直到他们挂电话。我一直希望在他们挂电话之后他们会检修自己的耳机或麦克风,从而少花点时间给别人打电话。

Anthoz
If I catch they’re telemarketers or scammers I usually try to take their order. “Domino’s pizza, can I take your order?”

假如我发现他们是电信诈骗或者电话销售的人,我通常会试着让他们点单。“多米诺披萨。您想点什么?”

If they catch me off guard and I have the time, I try to weird them out.

假如我一开始没发现他们,并且我有时间的话,我会让他们觉得我太怪。

“What are you wearing?” “Have you washed your teeth today?”

“你现在穿的是什么?”“你今天洗牙了吗?”

They hang up before I do. It’s fun.

他们会在我之前先把电话挂掉。很好玩。

Lobo-rojo
I keep them on the phone for as long as humanly possible. I switch up the conversation, ask questions, stray completely off topic, slip in a few personal questions and just do whatever I can do to waste as much of their time as I can.

我会把他们在电话上拖延尽可能久的时间。我会切换话题,问他们问题,聊彻底五官的话题,插进去一些个人问题,为了尽量浪费他们的时间绞尽脑汁。

My personal record is over 15 minutes of useless conversation which ended with me trying to proposition the male caller for sex. (For the record, I am a straight male and I assume that the caller was also straight.)

我的个人记录是跟某个骗子进行了15分钟毫无营养的对话,直到我说打算约那个男性骗子出来打炮的时候他把电话挂了。(有必要说一句,我是直男,我觉得那个打电话的也是)

I've been able to get an Indian telemarketer named Allen or Alex to give me his real name and location, and one telemarketer to stray from scxt and admit that like me, he's also tried cocaine.

我让一个名叫Allen或Alex的印度电话营销员给了我他的真实姓名和家庭地址,有个电话营销员不照着稿子念,承认和我一样他也吸过可卡因。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


In one instance I was able to get the caller to admit that she hated her job and was only doing it to put herself through school.

有一次我让打电话的人承认她不喜欢她的工作,只是想挣够学费。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


As much as I despise getting calls, I also try to remind myself that they are human beings, doing a job that everyone hates them for, and they probably hate themselves. I figure, at least perhaps I'll give them something funny to talk about after they get off of work.

尽管我不喜欢接电话,我还是试着告诉自己,他们也是人类,他们在做一个招人讨厌的工作,他们可能自己都讨厌自己。我想,至少我可以让他们在下班之后有点有趣的东西可以聊。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


Edit:. I do the above for telemarketers. If it's a scammer like the fake IRS gig or something similar, I still try to keep them on the phone for as long as possible, but I feel that they are scum of the earth and will try to make the call as painful for them as possible.. ( i.e. acting like an elderly person that doesn't understand the question, making them repeat sections of dialogue, asking a LOT of questions, etc.)

编辑:我只为电话营销的那些人做这种事情。假如来电话的是个假冒国税局之类的骗子,我当然也会让他们在电话上耽误越久越好,但我觉得他们是地球的渣滓,所以我会让他们的这通电话越痛苦越好……(比如假装自己是个听不懂问题的老年人,让他们重复某一部分的对话,问很多问题,等等。)

PyxlwasTaken
I would act as a dumb person and do everything they tell me NOT to do

我会假装自己是个笨蛋,把所有他们不让我做的事情都做一遍。

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