为什么中国人在朋友面前不说谢谢？（中）
正文翻译
为什么中国人在朋友面前不说谢谢？（中）
为什么中国人在朋友面前不说谢谢？（中）
评论翻译
Jack Bohannon
I am Chinese. And I’m answering this question from my personal experience.
我是中国人，我是根据我的个人经验回答这个问题的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I am Chinese. And I’m answering this question from my personal experience.
我是中国人，我是根据我的个人经验回答这个问题的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I was born in the northwest of China. Growing up there, it is true that people didn’t say ‘thank you’ as much, especially when you’re with your family or really close friends. I moved away in 2004, so it may be a bit different now.
我出生在中国的西北部。在那里长大，人们确实不怎么说“谢谢”，特别是当你和家人或亲密的朋友在一起的时候。我在2004年搬走了，所以现在可能有点不同。
我出生在中国的西北部。在那里长大，人们确实不怎么说“谢谢”，特别是当你和家人或亲密的朋友在一起的时候。我在2004年搬走了，所以现在可能有点不同。
In my family, I may say thank you to my brother while texting, but have rarely said it verbally, and vice versa. But we both know we do love each other unconditionally. Even the ‘xie xie’ in Mandarin would sound a bit strange in my own dialect - at least to me.
在我的家庭中，我可能会在发短信的时候对我的兄弟说声谢谢，但是很少口头说出来，反之亦然。但是我们都知道我们无条件地爱着对方。普通话中的“谢谢”在我自己的方言中听起来也有点奇怪——至少对我来说是这样。
在我的家庭中，我可能会在发短信的时候对我的兄弟说声谢谢，但是很少口头说出来，反之亦然。但是我们都知道我们无条件地爱着对方。普通话中的“谢谢”在我自己的方言中听起来也有点奇怪——至少对我来说是这样。
And then I moved to Shandong - Confucius’ home province - for university, and I had a bit of culture shock, coz people were surprised (maybe a bit upset even) by me not saying ‘thank you’ as much as they expected me to. My friends and I actually had conversations about it (in a friendly and constructive manner, tho).
然后我搬到了山东——孔子的故乡——上大学，我感到了一点文化冲击，因为人们对我没有像他们期望的那样说“谢谢你”感到惊讶(甚至有点沮丧)。事实上，我和我的朋友们就此进行了交谈(尽管是以一种友好和建设性的方式)。
然后我搬到了山东——孔子的故乡——上大学，我感到了一点文化冲击，因为人们对我没有像他们期望的那样说“谢谢你”感到惊讶(甚至有点沮丧)。事实上，我和我的朋友们就此进行了交谈(尽管是以一种友好和建设性的方式)。
After 5 years in Shandong, I moved to Beijing. People there say ‘thank you’ way more often than Shandong. Children are taught by their parents and the school to say ‘thank you’ as much as they should.
在山东生活了5年后，我搬到了北京。那里的人说谢谢的次数比山东多。孩子们的父母和老师教导他们尽可能多地说“谢谢”。
在山东生活了5年后，我搬到了北京。那里的人说谢谢的次数比山东多。孩子们的父母和老师教导他们尽可能多地说“谢谢”。
So I could say it depends. China is a huge and diversified nation. In places where Han (the major ethnic group) culture is dominant, people definitely say ‘thank you’ to people close to them. And there are also places where people are more shy about saying it out loud, but we express the gratitude through actual actions to honor the kindness we receive from each other.
所以不能统一概论。中国是一个庞大而多样化的国家。在汉族(主要民族)文化占主导地位的地方，人们肯定会对身边的人说“谢谢”。也有一些地方，人们不太好意思大声说出来，但是我们会通过实际行动来表达感激之情，以此来表达我们对彼此友善的尊重。
所以不能统一概论。中国是一个庞大而多样化的国家。在汉族(主要民族)文化占主导地位的地方，人们肯定会对身边的人说“谢谢”。也有一些地方，人们不太好意思大声说出来，但是我们会通过实际行动来表达感激之情，以此来表达我们对彼此友善的尊重。
Shaopeng Zhu
This is my guess. Only an interesting guess.
这是我一个有趣的猜测。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
This is my guess. Only an interesting guess.
这是我一个有趣的猜测。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Let’s assume that human beings are generally rational and self-interested. I know there are a huge amount of exceptions now but our ancestors would not survive if not being that way.
让我们假设人类通常是理性的和自私的。我知道现在有很多例外，但是如果不是这样，我们的祖先就不会生存下来。
让我们假设人类通常是理性的和自私的。我知道现在有很多例外，但是如果不是这样，我们的祖先就不会生存下来。
Having been developed in agricultural society, Chinese ancestors deal with a relatively closed circle of people. They live close together for cooperation and their social lives is to deal with those acquaintances daily. They help one other not because of kindness, but because they learned from accumulated lessons that offering help and getting help in return is beneficial for themselves. When they offer help, they are actually expecting help in return in the future when he is in need. The
closed agricultural society make that giving-returning model possible. But you ought to return the favor otherwise you lose credit among your peers.
中国先民是在农业社会发展起来的，他们生化的圈子相对封闭。他们为了合作而紧密地生活在一起，他们的社交生活就是每天和那些熟人打交道。他们互相帮助并不是因为善良，而是因为他们从积累的经验中学到，提供帮助并得到回报是有益于自己的。当他们提供帮助的时候，他们实际上是在期待未来他需要帮助的时候得到回报。封闭的农业社会使得这种回馈模式成为可能。但是你应该回报他们，否则你就会失去伙伴的信任。
closed agricultural society make that giving-returning model possible. But you ought to return the favor otherwise you lose credit among your peers.
中国先民是在农业社会发展起来的，他们生化的圈子相对封闭。他们为了合作而紧密地生活在一起，他们的社交生活就是每天和那些熟人打交道。他们互相帮助并不是因为善良，而是因为他们从积累的经验中学到，提供帮助并得到回报是有益于自己的。当他们提供帮助的时候，他们实际上是在期待未来他需要帮助的时候得到回报。封闭的农业社会使得这种回馈模式成为可能。但是你应该回报他们，否则你就会失去伙伴的信任。
As it evolves, sometimes “returning the favor” becomes a burden for the Chinese. If you know the “red package” (money wrapped into envelope-type of red paper package as gifts to others’ children or elderly) tradition of China, you may sense how serious a “favor” is to a Chinese. Red package is a gift but it’s far from a voluntary gift. You have to return that in a proper amount of money and proper way. If not handled correctly, you will be regarded as “greedy” or “showing off”.
随着事态的发展，有时候“还人情”会成为中国人的负担。如果你知道中国的“红包”传统，你可能会感觉到“帮忙”对中国人来说有多么重要。人们给红包远远不是出于自愿。你必须用适当的金额和适当的方式归还这些“红包”。如果处理不当，你会被视为“贪婪”或“炫耀”。
随着事态的发展，有时候“还人情”会成为中国人的负担。如果你知道中国的“红包”传统，你可能会感觉到“帮忙”对中国人来说有多么重要。人们给红包远远不是出于自愿。你必须用适当的金额和适当的方式归还这些“红包”。如果处理不当，你会被视为“贪婪”或“炫耀”。
Another example is the Chinese treating of a meal. You will see two parties “fighting” for offering their treat after a meal. Just being nice? Maybe. But the deep inside to me is to avoid being put into a situation where you must remember to return the favor some day.
另一个例子是中国人请客吃饭。你会看到两个人为抢着买单而“打架”。只是为了表示友好吗？也许吧。但是对我来说，更像是避免处于有一天要回请的尴尬境地。
另一个例子是中国人请客吃饭。你会看到两个人为抢着买单而“打架”。只是为了表示友好吗？也许吧。但是对我来说，更像是避免处于有一天要回请的尴尬境地。
So you see my point: saying “Thank you” means you have accepted others’ favor and implies that you need to return it some day. That’s far from easy since if you have many friends and relatives it’s hard to remember all and balance all.
我的意思是: 说“谢谢”意味着你已经接受了别人的好意，并且意味着你有一天需要回报他们。这远非易事，因为如果你有很多朋友和亲戚，就很难记住所有的人情往来。
我的意思是: 说“谢谢”意味着你已经接受了别人的好意，并且意味着你有一天需要回报他们。这远非易事，因为如果你有很多朋友和亲戚，就很难记住所有的人情往来。
That’s why the standard Chinese way of replying “Thank you” is not “you’re welcome” but “you don’t need to thank me”. That means “Yes I see your gratitude and I’m helping you/offering you something without seeking return of favor. Take it easy!”
这就是为什么中国人回答“谢谢”的标准方式不是“不客气”，而是“你不需要感谢我”。这意味着“是的，我看到了你的感激之情，我正在帮助你/给你一些东西，且不寻求回报。别紧张!”
这就是为什么中国人回答“谢谢”的标准方式不是“不客气”，而是“你不需要感谢我”。这意味着“是的，我看到了你的感激之情，我正在帮助你/给你一些东西，且不寻求回报。别紧张!”
That’s also why Chinese people regard saying “thank you” as overly polite and distant. Close friends and families don’t need to be obsessed into the messy and tiring social norm of returning favor. They are one.
这也是为什么中国人认为说“谢谢”过于礼貌和疏远。亲密的朋友和家人不需要纠结于回报恩惠这种操心的人情往来，他们是一体的。
这也是为什么中国人认为说“谢谢”过于礼貌和疏远。亲密的朋友和家人不需要纠结于回报恩惠这种操心的人情往来，他们是一体的。
Let me end with an interesting comparison.
让我以一个有趣的比较来结束。
让我以一个有趣的比较来结束。
Instead of saying “u r welcome”, English-speaking people that are close will reply “Sure!” to “Thank you”, accepting that as granted.
当说谢谢时，说英语的人不会回答到“不客气”，而是会回答“当然!” ，并认为这是理所当然的。
当说谢谢时，说英语的人不会回答到“不客气”，而是会回答“当然!” ，并认为这是理所当然的。
However, say a Chinese wife, heard a “Thank you” from her husband, the most probable answer will be things like “What have you done? Something in your mind? You’ve done something you’re feeling sorry to me?”
然而，一个中国妻子听到丈夫说“谢谢”时，最可能的回答是“你做了什么?”？你在想什么？你做了什么让你觉得对不起我的事吗?”
然而，一个中国妻子听到丈夫说“谢谢”时，最可能的回答是“你做了什么?”？你在想什么？你做了什么让你觉得对不起我的事吗?”
The sudden distance generated by “Thank you” reminded her of the exchange of favor.
“谢谢”所产生的距离感让她知道她丈夫肯定有所需求。
“谢谢”所产生的距离感让她知道她丈夫肯定有所需求。
Baiyan Zhao
I fit the stereotype because I don't remember i have ever said "thank you" to my families and my best friends. I say thank you to everyone else though.
我符合这种刻板印象，因为我不记得我曾经对我的家人和最好的朋友说过“谢谢”。但我还是要感谢其他所有人。
I feel that "thank you" has more do with courtesy and manner than it does with gratitude and appreciation. Between families and friends, a lot of feelings get through without being said, which is called silent mutual understanding (默契).
我觉得“谢谢”更多的是出于礼貌和举止，而不是出于感激和欣赏。在家人和朋友之间，许多感情不用说就能传递出去，这叫做默契。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I fit the stereotype because I don't remember i have ever said "thank you" to my families and my best friends. I say thank you to everyone else though.
我符合这种刻板印象，因为我不记得我曾经对我的家人和最好的朋友说过“谢谢”。但我还是要感谢其他所有人。
I feel that "thank you" has more do with courtesy and manner than it does with gratitude and appreciation. Between families and friends, a lot of feelings get through without being said, which is called silent mutual understanding (默契).
我觉得“谢谢”更多的是出于礼貌和举止，而不是出于感激和欣赏。在家人和朋友之间，许多感情不用说就能传递出去，这叫做默契。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Zhang Jian Qiao
With all due respect, the observation stated in the question, as far as my own experience goes, is false.
恕我直言，就我个人的经验而言，问题中所陈述的观点是错误的。
Born and raised in China, I have spent more than seventeen years there, mostly in the province of Shandong. In my observation, to say thank you or “谢谢/谢谢你/太感谢您了” is both customary and encouraged in daily life. Both my parents and the school system teach students at a young age about the importance of 礼, which roughly translates into courtesy.
我在中国出生长大，在那里生活了十七年多，大部分时间都在山东省。在我看来，说“谢谢/谢谢你/太感谢您了” 是日常生活中的习惯，是被鼓励的一种行为。我的父母和学校都在学生很小的时候就教导他们关于“礼”的重要性，这大致可以翻译成礼貌。
People usually respond to thank you with “太客气了(don’t be so polite)” or “不用谢(no need for thanks)”. However, phrases like them should not be taken literally, but as customary sayings of the Chinese language. Based on my own experience, if you are not too close with someone, not saying thank you will be considered as rude or rushy at best and ill-mannered at worst.
人们通常用“ 不要这么客气”或“ 不需要谢谢”来回答你的谢意。然而，像这样的短语不应该从字面上理解，而应该作为汉语的习惯用语。根据我自己的经验，如果你和某人关系不是很亲密，不说谢谢，往好了说会被认为是粗鲁或鲁莽，往坏了说会被认为是没有礼貌。
With all due respect, the observation stated in the question, as far as my own experience goes, is false.
恕我直言，就我个人的经验而言，问题中所陈述的观点是错误的。
Born and raised in China, I have spent more than seventeen years there, mostly in the province of Shandong. In my observation, to say thank you or “谢谢/谢谢你/太感谢您了” is both customary and encouraged in daily life. Both my parents and the school system teach students at a young age about the importance of 礼, which roughly translates into courtesy.
我在中国出生长大，在那里生活了十七年多，大部分时间都在山东省。在我看来，说“谢谢/谢谢你/太感谢您了” 是日常生活中的习惯，是被鼓励的一种行为。我的父母和学校都在学生很小的时候就教导他们关于“礼”的重要性，这大致可以翻译成礼貌。
People usually respond to thank you with “太客气了(don’t be so polite)” or “不用谢(no need for thanks)”. However, phrases like them should not be taken literally, but as customary sayings of the Chinese language. Based on my own experience, if you are not too close with someone, not saying thank you will be considered as rude or rushy at best and ill-mannered at worst.
人们通常用“ 不要这么客气”或“ 不需要谢谢”来回答你的谢意。然而，像这样的短语不应该从字面上理解，而应该作为汉语的习惯用语。根据我自己的经验，如果你和某人关系不是很亲密，不说谢谢，往好了说会被认为是粗鲁或鲁莽，往坏了说会被认为是没有礼貌。
This answer is based on my experience in the province of Shandong. China is incredibly diverse in cultures and customs, and other regions might have a different culture or linguistic custom(for example, it is possible that somewhere thank you is considered as overly formal) that does follow what’s stated in the question.
这个答案是基于我在山东省的经验。中国在文化和习俗方面有着令人难以置信的多样性，其他地区可能有着不同的文化或语言习俗(例如，某些地方的“谢谢”可能被认为过于正式) ，这确实遵循了问题中所陈述的内容。
这个答案是基于我在山东省的经验。中国在文化和习俗方面有着令人难以置信的多样性，其他地区可能有着不同的文化或语言习俗(例如，某些地方的“谢谢”可能被认为过于正式) ，这确实遵循了问题中所陈述的内容。
To Hatou
I would like to address this question from a semantic perspective.
我想从语义学的角度来解释这个问题。
Because xiexie(谢谢) is not equal to thank you, it's far more formal. In classical Chinese, when you xie(谢) sb., you are expected to bow at least, even to kowtow. We, no matter American or Chinese, only use formal language in situations that are serious or that involve people we don’t know well.
因为中文的“谢谢”不等同于英文的“thank you” ，谢谢要更正式一些。在古汉语中，当你“谢谢”某人的时候，你至少要鞠躬，甚至还要磕头。我们，不管是美国人还是中国人，只有在正式场合或者涉及到我们不熟悉的人的时候才使用正式的语言。
I would like to address this question from a semantic perspective.
我想从语义学的角度来解释这个问题。
Because xiexie(谢谢) is not equal to thank you, it's far more formal. In classical Chinese, when you xie(谢) sb., you are expected to bow at least, even to kowtow. We, no matter American or Chinese, only use formal language in situations that are serious or that involve people we don’t know well.
因为中文的“谢谢”不等同于英文的“thank you” ，谢谢要更正式一些。在古汉语中，当你“谢谢”某人的时候，你至少要鞠躬，甚至还要磕头。我们，不管是美国人还是中国人，只有在正式场合或者涉及到我们不熟悉的人的时候才使用正式的语言。
So in China, you say xiexie to a passer-by after she shows you how to go to the nearest toilet, to your audience when you finish your presentation, to your TAXI driver after he drives you home, etc. But you will choose informal way to express gratitude to your friends, e.g., tap your fingers on the desk when your friend fills your cup up, say how delicious it is when your roommate brings you his homemade pancake, give a hearty slap on the back when your buddy lends you his porn.
所以在中国，当路人教你如何去最近的厕所时，当你的听众听完你的演讲时，当出租车司机开车送你回家时，你需要对他说谢谢。但是你会选择非正式的方式来表达你对朋友的感激之情，例如，当你的朋友给你续杯时，用你的手指在桌子上轻敲，当你的室友给你自制薄饼的时候，说它是多么的美味，当你的朋友借给你他的色情片的时候，你怕怕他的后背。
Though I always avoid to mix English into Chinese, for daily use, I tend to say thank you and bye-bye instead of its Chinese counterpart. Modern Chinese courtesy words like, 谢谢(thanks),再见(goodbye) sounds really awkward to me.
虽然我总是避免把英语和中文混在一起，但在日常生活中，我更倾向于“thank you”和“bye-bye”，而不是说中文。现代汉语的礼貌用语，听起来真的很尴尬，如谢谢和再见。
所以在中国，当路人教你如何去最近的厕所时，当你的听众听完你的演讲时，当出租车司机开车送你回家时，你需要对他说谢谢。但是你会选择非正式的方式来表达你对朋友的感激之情，例如，当你的朋友给你续杯时，用你的手指在桌子上轻敲，当你的室友给你自制薄饼的时候，说它是多么的美味，当你的朋友借给你他的色情片的时候，你怕怕他的后背。
Though I always avoid to mix English into Chinese, for daily use, I tend to say thank you and bye-bye instead of its Chinese counterpart. Modern Chinese courtesy words like, 谢谢(thanks),再见(goodbye) sounds really awkward to me.
虽然我总是避免把英语和中文混在一起，但在日常生活中，我更倾向于“thank you”和“bye-bye”，而不是说中文。现代汉语的礼貌用语，听起来真的很尴尬，如谢谢和再见。
Bingzhuo Lee
I am a Chinese and my english is so bad.Anyway,when I saw this question,I think I have some useful experience to help some people.
我是一个中国人，我的英语很差。无论如何，当我看到这个问题时，我想和你们分享一些有用的经验。
I am a Chinese and my english is so bad.Anyway,when I saw this question,I think I have some useful experience to help some people.
我是一个中国人，我的英语很差。无论如何，当我看到这个问题时，我想和你们分享一些有用的经验。
In this country,A lot of people are not accustomed to using language to express emotions.We prefer action than words.Because we believe that action is more powerful than words .If my friends help me to deal some problems,I will say nothing but I would like to thank him very much at heart.Later,When he had some problems，I will try to help him.
在中国，很多人不习惯用语言来表达情感。我们喜欢行动胜过语言。因为我们相信行动比语言更有力量。如果我的朋友帮助我处理一些问题，我会什么也不说，但我要在心里非常感谢他。以后，当他遇到一些问题时，我会尽力帮助他。
在中国，很多人不习惯用语言来表达情感。我们喜欢行动胜过语言。因为我们相信行动比语言更有力量。如果我的朋友帮助我处理一些问题，我会什么也不说，但我要在心里非常感谢他。以后，当他遇到一些问题时，我会尽力帮助他。
Because We prefer action than words.
因为我们更喜欢行动而不是语言。
因为我们更喜欢行动而不是语言。
(My english is very very bad.don't laugh at me)
(我的英语非常非常差。别笑我。)
(我的英语非常非常差。别笑我。)
Mu Chang
As a Chinese, I say "thank you " whenever my friends do me a favor. Mostly vice versa. Also I say "thank you" evey time after the waitress serve the table.
作为一个中国人，每当我的朋友帮我忙时，我都会说“谢谢”。大多数情况下，反之亦然。每次女服务员上菜后，我都会说“谢谢”。
As a Chinese, I say "thank you " whenever my friends do me a favor. Mostly vice versa. Also I say "thank you" evey time after the waitress serve the table.
作为一个中国人，每当我的朋友帮我忙时，我都会说“谢谢”。大多数情况下，反之亦然。每次女服务员上菜后，我都会说“谢谢”。
But it's true that when I say thank you to my close friends, sometimes they would say "you don't have to say thank you to me". Saying thank you all the time may makes people think you're not close enough.
但事实是，当我对我的好朋友说谢谢的时候，他们有时会说“你不必对我说谢谢”。一直说谢谢可能会让别人觉得你不够亲近。
但事实是，当我对我的好朋友说谢谢的时候，他们有时会说“你不必对我说谢谢”。一直说谢谢可能会让别人觉得你不够亲近。
Yun Hong
In China, “Thank you” ”Please” , these words rarely appear in daily conversation. Chinese people only say such words in the very urgent situation. If my friends call me and start with “Would you please help me…”, I will immediately know this matter is very important to him, so I will try my best to help him. And finally he will say “Thank you” to me.
在中国，“谢谢”这个词很少出现在日常对话中。中国人只有在非常紧急的情况下才会说这样的话。如果我的朋友打电话给我，上来就说“你能帮助我...”，我就明白这件事对他来说非常重要，所以我会尽力帮助他。最后他会对我说“谢谢”。
In China, “Thank you” ”Please” , these words rarely appear in daily conversation. Chinese people only say such words in the very urgent situation. If my friends call me and start with “Would you please help me…”, I will immediately know this matter is very important to him, so I will try my best to help him. And finally he will say “Thank you” to me.
在中国，“谢谢”这个词很少出现在日常对话中。中国人只有在非常紧急的情况下才会说这样的话。如果我的朋友打电话给我，上来就说“你能帮助我...”，我就明白这件事对他来说非常重要，所以我会尽力帮助他。最后他会对我说“谢谢”。
Christian Kober
Someone once explained to me: "To my driver I say thank you. To you I do not say thank you because we are so close it is obvious that I am thankful and such superficial words are not necessary between close friends."
有人曾经对我解释说: “我要对我的司机说声谢谢。但我不会对你说谢谢，因为我们是如此亲密，很明显，我很感激，但亲密的朋友之间不需要说这种肤浅的话。”
Someone once explained to me: "To my driver I say thank you. To you I do not say thank you because we are so close it is obvious that I am thankful and such superficial words are not necessary between close friends."
有人曾经对我解释说: “我要对我的司机说声谢谢。但我不会对你说谢谢，因为我们是如此亲密，很明显，我很感激，但亲密的朋友之间不需要说这种肤浅的话。”
Hanni Guo
I'm Chinese and living in China now. I say lots of thank you every day and so do others around me. But it's true that I hardly say thank you to my families and best friends. For one thing, it's the tradition that makes us think if we are close enough, we help each other out of instinct. So there is no need to say thank you. For another thing, local Chinese people are not that good at express their feelings. They may feel shy to say thank you to people whom they are very close to.
我是中国人，现在住在中国。我每天都说很多谢谢你，我周围的人也是如此。但是我很少对我的家人和最好的朋友说谢谢，这是事实。一方面，传统使我们认为，如果我们足够亲近，我们会出于本能互相帮助。所以没有必要说谢谢。另一方面，中国人并不善于表达他们的感情。他们可能会羞于对他们非常亲近的人说谢谢。
I'm Chinese and living in China now. I say lots of thank you every day and so do others around me. But it's true that I hardly say thank you to my families and best friends. For one thing, it's the tradition that makes us think if we are close enough, we help each other out of instinct. So there is no need to say thank you. For another thing, local Chinese people are not that good at express their feelings. They may feel shy to say thank you to people whom they are very close to.
我是中国人，现在住在中国。我每天都说很多谢谢你，我周围的人也是如此。但是我很少对我的家人和最好的朋友说谢谢，这是事实。一方面，传统使我们认为，如果我们足够亲近，我们会出于本能互相帮助。所以没有必要说谢谢。另一方面，中国人并不善于表达他们的感情。他们可能会羞于对他们非常亲近的人说谢谢。
Max Liao
As a Chinese guy, I would never want my close friends to say thank you to me when I help them out. It is because in my mind, we are so close that we help each other like helping ourselves, and a thank you is not necessary and may sounds a little bit strange. In China, there is a saying "大恩不言谢", meaning people don't say thank you for big helps others done. We say thank you by other ways, e.g. by helping back in the future.
作为一个中国人，我从来不希望我的好朋友在我帮助他们的时候对我说谢谢。这是因为在我心目中，我们是如此亲密，以至于我们互相帮助就像帮助自己一样，而且一句谢谢并不是必要的，而且可能听起来有点奇怪。在中国，有一句谚语“大恩不言谢”，意思是人们不会对帮助自己的大事说谢谢。我们通过其他方式表示感谢，例如，在将来你需要帮助的时候帮助你。
As a Chinese guy, I would never want my close friends to say thank you to me when I help them out. It is because in my mind, we are so close that we help each other like helping ourselves, and a thank you is not necessary and may sounds a little bit strange. In China, there is a saying "大恩不言谢", meaning people don't say thank you for big helps others done. We say thank you by other ways, e.g. by helping back in the future.
作为一个中国人，我从来不希望我的好朋友在我帮助他们的时候对我说谢谢。这是因为在我心目中，我们是如此亲密，以至于我们互相帮助就像帮助自己一样，而且一句谢谢并不是必要的，而且可能听起来有点奇怪。在中国，有一句谚语“大恩不言谢”，意思是人们不会对帮助自己的大事说谢谢。我们通过其他方式表示感谢，例如，在将来你需要帮助的时候帮助你。
Anonymous
Chinese cultures emphasize modesty and humbleness. Keep saying "thank you" or expressing your gratitute too often too loud makes people feel you are overly warm-hearted and hypocritic.
中国文化强调谦逊。不停地说“谢谢”或者过于大声地表达你的感激之情会让别人觉得你过于热心和虚伪。
Chinese cultures emphasize modesty and humbleness. Keep saying "thank you" or expressing your gratitute too often too loud makes people feel you are overly warm-hearted and hypocritic.
中国文化强调谦逊。不停地说“谢谢”或者过于大声地表达你的感激之情会让别人觉得你过于热心和虚伪。
Yuncheng Mao
One cannot ignore this fundamental factor: being polite in the contemporary Chinese culture is a way of showing distance between people. Strangely enough (and no one can tell when it started in Chinese history), in China when people get close to each other, they believe that people should discard their politeness and reveal their “true desire” so as to be frank and honest towards “friends” or companions.
我们不能忽视这一基本因素: 在当代中国文化中，礼貌是一种表现人与人之间距离的方式。奇怪的是，在中国，当人们彼此很亲密的时候，他们认为人们应该抛弃礼貌，表达出他们的“真实情感”，以便对“朋友”或“同伴”坦诚相待。
One cannot ignore this fundamental factor: being polite in the contemporary Chinese culture is a way of showing distance between people. Strangely enough (and no one can tell when it started in Chinese history), in China when people get close to each other, they believe that people should discard their politeness and reveal their “true desire” so as to be frank and honest towards “friends” or companions.
我们不能忽视这一基本因素: 在当代中国文化中，礼貌是一种表现人与人之间距离的方式。奇怪的是，在中国，当人们彼此很亲密的时候，他们认为人们应该抛弃礼貌，表达出他们的“真实情感”，以便对“朋友”或“同伴”坦诚相待。
Here is a small story of my own when I was in France. One day I was talking with my ex-girlfriend (then girlfriend) who was staying in China, I just habitually said “thank you” to her, which is just a very common behavior in France. The next thing, she started questioning why I say “thank you” to her and whether I was going to break up with her (well. we finally broke up for other reasons). That really took me. I spent a lot of effort to comfort her and assure her that there is nothing abnormal going on between us.
下面是我在法国时的一个小故事。有一天，我和留在中国的前女友(当时是女友)聊天时，我习惯性地对她说“谢谢”，这在法国是很常见的行为。接下来，她开始质疑我为什么要对她说“谢谢”，以及我是否会和她分手。我们最终因为其他原因分手了。向她解释我为什么对她说谢谢真的花了我不少时间。我花了很多精力去安慰她，并向她保证我们之间没有什么不正常的事情。
下面是我在法国时的一个小故事。有一天，我和留在中国的前女友(当时是女友)聊天时，我习惯性地对她说“谢谢”，这在法国是很常见的行为。接下来，她开始质疑我为什么要对她说“谢谢”，以及我是否会和她分手。我们最终因为其他原因分手了。向她解释我为什么对她说谢谢真的花了我不少时间。我花了很多精力去安慰她，并向她保证我们之间没有什么不正常的事情。
This rule can also help you understand partially the alcohol culture of China. When you dare to show your ugly part to someone, you are telling him you are treating him as a true friend (even though that’s not necessarily true at all).
这个规则也可以帮助你部分理解中国的酒文化。当你敢于向别人展示你“出丑”的一面时，你就是在告诉他，你把他当作真正的朋友对待(尽管事实并非如此)。
这个规则也可以帮助你部分理解中国的酒文化。当你敢于向别人展示你“出丑”的一面时，你就是在告诉他，你把他当作真正的朋友对待(尽管事实并非如此)。
But there in fact some problems of this rule of showing closeness by being rude and impolite, because you don’t always know the tolerance and the bottom line of your counterpart. If you happened to do or say something that is no big deal to others but means something serious to this specific person, you risk transforming a friend into an enemy.
但事实上，这种通过粗鲁和不礼貌来表现亲密的规则存在一些问题，因为你并不总是知道对方的容忍度和底线。如果你碰巧做了或者说了一些对别人来说没什么大不了的事情，但是对这个特定的人来说却意味着很严重的事情，那么你就有把朋友变成敌人的危险。
但事实上，这种通过粗鲁和不礼貌来表现亲密的规则存在一些问题，因为你并不总是知道对方的容忍度和底线。如果你碰巧做了或者说了一些对别人来说没什么大不了的事情，但是对这个特定的人来说却意味着很严重的事情，那么你就有把朋友变成敌人的危险。
Murray Farrell
I stayed with a Chinese family in Shenzhen for 10 days and it was a wonderful experience as they have a privileged background. They would serve me food at the dinner table and I would continually say "Thank you" in appreciation. It is my habit - I am Australian.
我在深圳的一个中国家庭呆了10天，这是一次美好的经历，因为他们有着特权背景。他们会在餐桌上为我提供食物，我会不断地说“谢谢你”以示感谢。这是我的习惯，我是一名澳大利亚人。
I stayed with a Chinese family in Shenzhen for 10 days and it was a wonderful experience as they have a privileged background. They would serve me food at the dinner table and I would continually say "Thank you" in appreciation. It is my habit - I am Australian.
我在深圳的一个中国家庭呆了10天，这是一次美好的经历，因为他们有着特权背景。他们会在餐桌上为我提供食物，我会不断地说“谢谢你”以示感谢。这是我的习惯，我是一名澳大利亚人。
Connie, my host originally from Futian, Fujian Province told me: -
接待我的女主人来自福建福田，她告诉我:-
接待我的女主人来自福建福田，她告诉我:-
"No need to say that. You are here as a family member and we treat you as a family member. There is no need to say 'thank you' as we know everyone in the family is appreciative and we do not expect thanks. That is our culture."
“没有必要这么说。我们把你当做一个家庭成员对待。没有必要说“谢谢”，因为我们知道家里的每个人都很感激，我们也不期待感谢。这就是我们的文化。”
“没有必要这么说。我们把你当做一个家庭成员对待。没有必要说“谢谢”，因为我们知道家里的每个人都很感激，我们也不期待感谢。这就是我们的文化。”
Li-Geng Tian
There is a idiom that goes 大恩不言谢 , that basically means 'big favour needs no thanks'. The idea is that if somebody helped you tremendously, you should remember it and aim to repay the favour someday in action, not simply words of gratitude.
有一个成语大恩不言谢 ，基本上意思是“大忙不用谢”。大体意思是，如果有人帮了你一个大忙，你应该记住这一点，并致力于在某一天的行动中报答这个帮助，而不是说一些简单的感激之词。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
There is a idiom that goes 大恩不言谢 , that basically means 'big favour needs no thanks'. The idea is that if somebody helped you tremendously, you should remember it and aim to repay the favour someday in action, not simply words of gratitude.
有一个成语大恩不言谢 ，基本上意思是“大忙不用谢”。大体意思是，如果有人帮了你一个大忙，你应该记住这一点，并致力于在某一天的行动中报答这个帮助，而不是说一些简单的感激之词。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Shaofeng Lv
I was born and grew up in a traditional Chinese family, like many other families in China, that we don’t say thanks to each other. None of us think or realize this is necessary and important to each other, because everyone else is doing the same way, and because no one else tells us that we should, and we don’t know that is very very common routine in western world before 1980s. What is more than this is that we do not directly express how much we appreciate and love each others. The result is that you will become very skeptical that your parents or husband or wife really love you, whenever a serious family row occurs. I started to see the negative influence to accumulate little by little over the years, it eventually turns to be severe lack of mutual respect and understanding among family members, which in the end could cause a family to fall apart. It is the kind of culture in many families, and it is inherited to family of next generation without being noticed by many people.
我出生和成长在一个传统的中国家庭，就像中国的其他家庭一样，我们不会对彼此说谢谢。我们没有人认为或者意识到这对彼此来说是必要的和重要的，因为其他人都在以同样的方式做事，因为没有人告诉我们应该这样做，而且我们不知道这在20世纪80年代以前的西方世界是非常常见的例行公事。更重要的是，我们没有直接表达我们有多么欣赏和爱对方。其结果是，每当家庭发生严重争吵时，你就会变得非常怀疑你的父母或丈夫或妻子是否真的爱你。这些年来我开始看到不善于表达感情带来的负面影响，最终变成家庭成员之间严重缺乏相互尊重和理解，最终可能导致家庭破裂。这种文化在很多家庭中都存在，并且在没有被很多人注意到的情况下被传给了下一代。
I was born and grew up in a traditional Chinese family, like many other families in China, that we don’t say thanks to each other. None of us think or realize this is necessary and important to each other, because everyone else is doing the same way, and because no one else tells us that we should, and we don’t know that is very very common routine in western world before 1980s. What is more than this is that we do not directly express how much we appreciate and love each others. The result is that you will become very skeptical that your parents or husband or wife really love you, whenever a serious family row occurs. I started to see the negative influence to accumulate little by little over the years, it eventually turns to be severe lack of mutual respect and understanding among family members, which in the end could cause a family to fall apart. It is the kind of culture in many families, and it is inherited to family of next generation without being noticed by many people.
我出生和成长在一个传统的中国家庭，就像中国的其他家庭一样，我们不会对彼此说谢谢。我们没有人认为或者意识到这对彼此来说是必要的和重要的，因为其他人都在以同样的方式做事，因为没有人告诉我们应该这样做，而且我们不知道这在20世纪80年代以前的西方世界是非常常见的例行公事。更重要的是，我们没有直接表达我们有多么欣赏和爱对方。其结果是，每当家庭发生严重争吵时，你就会变得非常怀疑你的父母或丈夫或妻子是否真的爱你。这些年来我开始看到不善于表达感情带来的负面影响，最终变成家庭成员之间严重缺乏相互尊重和理解，最终可能导致家庭破裂。这种文化在很多家庭中都存在，并且在没有被很多人注意到的情况下被传给了下一代。
Yuning Chen
Did many people over thinked in this?
是不是有很多人在这件事上想得太多了？
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Did many people over thinked in this?
是不是有很多人在这件事上想得太多了？
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
We do say thank you to our friends. Although a lot of people will reply: you dont need to say thank you to friends.
我们有对我们的朋友说谢谢。虽然很多人会回答: 你不需要对朋友说谢谢。
我们有对我们的朋友说谢谢。虽然很多人会回答: 你不需要对朋友说谢谢。
They might just being polite to you. But but if just ignore what they did to you, dont expect the same again next time.
他们可能只是对你有礼貌。但是如果忽略他们对你的帮助，不要指望下次还会发生同样的事情。
他们可能只是对你有礼貌。但是如果忽略他们对你的帮助，不要指望下次还会发生同样的事情。
Ford Fu
I think your question can be divided into two situations. It depends on what kind of friends of yours.
我认为你的问题可以分为两种情况，这取决于你的朋友是什么类型的。
I think your question can be divided into two situations. It depends on what kind of friends of yours.
我认为你的问题可以分为两种情况，这取决于你的朋友是什么类型的。
1. normal friends
At this situation, people always try to be polite to each other for a good impression. As a result, people say thank you all the time when others help him or her.
1.普通朋友。在这种情况下，人们总是试图对彼此礼貌以获得好的印象。因此，当别人帮助他或她时，人们总是说谢谢。
At this situation, people always try to be polite to each other for a good impression. As a result, people say thank you all the time when others help him or her.
1.普通朋友。在这种情况下，人们总是试图对彼此礼貌以获得好的印象。因此，当别人帮助他或她时，人们总是说谢谢。
2. close friends
when a Chinese take you as a close friend, he or she would do his or her best to take care of you. Sometimes, they would take it for granted to help friends or receive support from their friends. At this case, they would not mention thank you anymore.
2。亲密的朋友。当一个中国人把你当作亲密的朋友，他或她会尽他或她最大的努力来照顾你。有时，他们会认为帮助朋友或从朋友那里得到支持是理所当然的。在这种情况下，他们不会再说谢谢了。
when a Chinese take you as a close friend, he or she would do his or her best to take care of you. Sometimes, they would take it for granted to help friends or receive support from their friends. At this case, they would not mention thank you anymore.
2。亲密的朋友。当一个中国人把你当作亲密的朋友，他或她会尽他或她最大的努力来照顾你。有时，他们会认为帮助朋友或从朋友那里得到支持是理所当然的。在这种情况下，他们不会再说谢谢了。
This is my own points.
这是我自己的观点。
这是我自己的观点。
Eetau Wong
In facts,it's not we speak thanks so offen,we just seldom do it to our families and closed friends.As a Chinese,I usually speak thanks to someone we aren't so closed.such as,waitress…However,it seems I never say it to my families and friends.In my opinions,we needn't it.We remember everyone's kindness,and we will help each other if someone in need.All these done is so natural.I enjoy the relationship.Perhaps,it will make distance between friends when thanks was spoke.It is Chinese minds.
事实上，不是我们不经常说谢谢，而我们只是很少对我们的家人和亲密的朋友说谢谢。作为一个中国人，我通常要感谢那些关系不是那么亲密的人。例如，女服务员... ... 然而，我似乎从来没有对我的家人和朋友说过这句话。所有这些都很自然，我喜欢这种关系。也许，说出感谢的话会拉开朋友之间的距离。这或许是中国人的思想。
In facts,it's not we speak thanks so offen,we just seldom do it to our families and closed friends.As a Chinese,I usually speak thanks to someone we aren't so closed.such as,waitress…However,it seems I never say it to my families and friends.In my opinions,we needn't it.We remember everyone's kindness,and we will help each other if someone in need.All these done is so natural.I enjoy the relationship.Perhaps,it will make distance between friends when thanks was spoke.It is Chinese minds.
事实上，不是我们不经常说谢谢，而我们只是很少对我们的家人和亲密的朋友说谢谢。作为一个中国人，我通常要感谢那些关系不是那么亲密的人。例如，女服务员... ... 然而，我似乎从来没有对我的家人和朋友说过这句话。所有这些都很自然，我喜欢这种关系。也许，说出感谢的话会拉开朋友之间的距离。这或许是中国人的思想。
Ryxin Wu
If you are my friend and did something to help me. I will use my credit card to pay the bill when we have a lunch at the next time instead of saying thank you. And I will say that 有空请你吃饭. We consider that eating is very import for everyone who is alive in the world.
如果你是我的朋友并且帮助了我。下次我们吃午饭的时候，我会用我的信用卡付账，而不是说谢谢。我会说有空请你吃饭。我们认为吃对世界上每一个活着的人来说都是非常重要的。民以食为天。
If you are my friend and did something to help me. I will use my credit card to pay the bill when we have a lunch at the next time instead of saying thank you. And I will say that 有空请你吃饭. We consider that eating is very import for everyone who is alive in the world.
如果你是我的朋友并且帮助了我。下次我们吃午饭的时候，我会用我的信用卡付账，而不是说谢谢。我会说有空请你吃饭。我们认为吃对世界上每一个活着的人来说都是非常重要的。民以食为天。
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