你在生活中经历过的最艰难的事情是什么，你是如何克服的？（上）
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Ovie Okeh
I was repeatedly raped by a neighbor when I was 7 years old. I didn't want my mother to find out, because she was a single mother working 3 jobs to support me and my brother and she cried enough as it was. We lived in a trailer that had holes in the floor so that sometimes raccoons and opossums would climb through. I was scared of them. The carpet was infested with fleas. I usually had flea bites all over my body. I never felt clean. We got clothes from Goodwill but they were usually old, faded, and stained. My mother did the best she could but we were all alone in the world. We lived in a rural area that was unforgiving of those who deviated from "the norm." My mother tried to baptize me when I was a baby, only to be turned away by the local preacher because I was "a bastard." We were not welcome in their churches, which were an important part of rural life there. I didn't have friends at school. I was "weird" "dirty" "ugly" "too quiet" etc. Even most of the teachers looked at me and my brother in disgust.
在我7岁的时候，我多次被邻居QJ。我不想让我妈妈发现，因为她是单亲妈妈，要打三份工来养活我和我弟弟，她哭得够多的了。我们住在一个活动板房里，地板上有洞，有时浣熊和负鼠会爬进来。我很害怕他们。地毯上满是跳蚤。我经常全身都被跳蚤咬伤。我从没觉得自己干净过。我们从慈善机构买衣服，但通常都是旧的、褪色的、有污渍的。我母亲尽了最大的努力，但我们在这个世界上都是孤独的，因为我们生活在一个对那些偏离“规范”的人不宽容的农村地区。当我还是个婴儿的时候，我母亲试图给我施洗，但被当地的牧师拒绝了，因为我是“私生子”。我们在他们的教堂里不受欢迎，而教堂是那里农村生活的重要组成部分。我在学校没有朋友。我“古怪”、“肮脏”、“丑陋”、“寡言”。甚至大多数老师都厌恶地看着我和我弟弟。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I was repeatedly raped by a neighbor when I was 7 years old. I didn't want my mother to find out, because she was a single mother working 3 jobs to support me and my brother and she cried enough as it was. We lived in a trailer that had holes in the floor so that sometimes raccoons and opossums would climb through. I was scared of them. The carpet was infested with fleas. I usually had flea bites all over my body. I never felt clean. We got clothes from Goodwill but they were usually old, faded, and stained. My mother did the best she could but we were all alone in the world. We lived in a rural area that was unforgiving of those who deviated from "the norm." My mother tried to baptize me when I was a baby, only to be turned away by the local preacher because I was "a bastard." We were not welcome in their churches, which were an important part of rural life there. I didn't have friends at school. I was "weird" "dirty" "ugly" "too quiet" etc. Even most of the teachers looked at me and my brother in disgust.
在我7岁的时候，我多次被邻居QJ。我不想让我妈妈发现，因为她是单亲妈妈，要打三份工来养活我和我弟弟，她哭得够多的了。我们住在一个活动板房里，地板上有洞，有时浣熊和负鼠会爬进来。我很害怕他们。地毯上满是跳蚤。我经常全身都被跳蚤咬伤。我从没觉得自己干净过。我们从慈善机构买衣服，但通常都是旧的、褪色的、有污渍的。我母亲尽了最大的努力，但我们在这个世界上都是孤独的，因为我们生活在一个对那些偏离“规范”的人不宽容的农村地区。当我还是个婴儿的时候，我母亲试图给我施洗，但被当地的牧师拒绝了，因为我是“私生子”。我们在他们的教堂里不受欢迎，而教堂是那里农村生活的重要组成部分。我在学校没有朋友。我“古怪”、“肮脏”、“丑陋”、“寡言”。甚至大多数老师都厌恶地看着我和我弟弟。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I grew up with the understanding that I was worthless. That I should be ashamed of who I am. I barely said a word through most of my childhood. I didn't say a word to anyone when they pushed me around, taunted me endlessly, beat up my brother and I. I never said a word when my neighbor (who, interestingly, was widely regarded as an outstanding member of society) raped me.
I led a very solitary life. My mother was usually gone at work, my brother would devote himself to his own activities, and there I was. I remember I would sit outside of my home and pretend to be a rock, because rocks didn't feel anything and they certainly didn't cry. They were indestructible, I thought.
在成长过程中，我一直认为自己毫无价值。我应该为自己的身份感到羞耻。在我童年的大部分时间里我几乎没说过一句话。当我的邻居(有趣的是，他被广泛认为是社会上杰出的一员)QJ我时，我一言不发。我过着非常孤独的生活。我的母亲通常去上班了，我的弟弟会全身心地投入到他自己的活动中，而我就会独自坐在那里。我记得我会坐在屋外，假装自己是一块石头，因为石头没有任何感觉，它们当然也不会哭。我想，它们是坚不可摧的。
I led a very solitary life. My mother was usually gone at work, my brother would devote himself to his own activities, and there I was. I remember I would sit outside of my home and pretend to be a rock, because rocks didn't feel anything and they certainly didn't cry. They were indestructible, I thought.
在成长过程中，我一直认为自己毫无价值。我应该为自己的身份感到羞耻。在我童年的大部分时间里我几乎没说过一句话。当我的邻居(有趣的是，他被广泛认为是社会上杰出的一员)QJ我时，我一言不发。我过着非常孤独的生活。我的母亲通常去上班了，我的弟弟会全身心地投入到他自己的活动中，而我就会独自坐在那里。我记得我会坐在屋外，假装自己是一块石头，因为石头没有任何感觉，它们当然也不会哭。我想，它们是坚不可摧的。
I overheard one of the other little girls discussing the prayer they said before bedtime and I resolved to remember it. It went like this - As I lay down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep, if I shall die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.
I thought about this prayer for the rest of the day, until I went home and decided on my own version: Dear God, I don't want to live anymore. There are other people begging you to keep them alive. Let me take their place. I'll die. I was about 8 years old.
我无意中听到其他小女孩在讨论她们睡前念的祷文，我决心要记住它。因为当我躺下睡觉的时候，我可以向上帝祈祷：如果我在醒来之前死去，请上帝带走我的灵魂。那天余下的时间里，我一直在想这个祷告，直到我回到家，并决定了我自己的版本：亲爱的上帝，我不想再活下去了。如果还有其他人求你让他们活着。让我代替他们死去吧。那时我大概8岁。
I thought about this prayer for the rest of the day, until I went home and decided on my own version: Dear God, I don't want to live anymore. There are other people begging you to keep them alive. Let me take their place. I'll die. I was about 8 years old.
我无意中听到其他小女孩在讨论她们睡前念的祷文，我决心要记住它。因为当我躺下睡觉的时候，我可以向上帝祈祷：如果我在醒来之前死去，请上帝带走我的灵魂。那天余下的时间里，我一直在想这个祷告，直到我回到家，并决定了我自己的版本：亲爱的上帝，我不想再活下去了。如果还有其他人求你让他们活着。让我代替他们死去吧。那时我大概8岁。
But I didn't die, much to my dismay. I woke up the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that. The days went by. My situation didn't greatly improve, people weren't much nicer to me, and my life didn't get easier. But I got stronger. I discovered books as a way to escape from my tedious existence and by the time I was in 5th grade, I was reading at a college level.
I grew up and gained control over my life. I was no longer the defenseless, powerless victim I had been as a child. I had power. I could do whatever I wanted. I got a job. I studied hard so I could go to a good college. I escaped from my small, unforgiving town.
但我没有死，这让我很沮丧。我第二天醒来了，明天，后天，日子一天天过去了。我的处境并没有得到很大的改善，人们也没有对我更好，我的生活也没有变得更轻松。但我变得更强壮了。我发现读书是摆脱乏味生活的一种方式，到我五年级的时候，我已经达到了大学的阅读水平。我长大了，可以掌控自己的生活。我不再是小时候那个手无寸铁、无能为力的受害者了。我有能力，我想做什么就做什么。我找到工作了，因为我努力学习并考上了一所好大学。我逃离了那个无情的小镇。
I grew up and gained control over my life. I was no longer the defenseless, powerless victim I had been as a child. I had power. I could do whatever I wanted. I got a job. I studied hard so I could go to a good college. I escaped from my small, unforgiving town.
但我没有死，这让我很沮丧。我第二天醒来了，明天，后天，日子一天天过去了。我的处境并没有得到很大的改善，人们也没有对我更好，我的生活也没有变得更轻松。但我变得更强壮了。我发现读书是摆脱乏味生活的一种方式，到我五年级的时候，我已经达到了大学的阅读水平。我长大了，可以掌控自己的生活。我不再是小时候那个手无寸铁、无能为力的受害者了。我有能力，我想做什么就做什么。我找到工作了，因为我努力学习并考上了一所好大学。我逃离了那个无情的小镇。
I have a good job now and good relationships. People who know me now would never guess I was once that hungry, miserable, terrified, beaten down little girl I had been back then.
As for my family, my mother still lives in that trailer. My neighbor is long dead. My older brother still lives with my mother. He has never gotten a driver's license or a job. He doesn't leave the house very often. A part of me understands his reluctance - why let the world do you more harm when it has already done so much? But I wish he would take the chance. I feel sad that our childhood all but destroyed him.
If you want to know how to get through hard things, my answer is probably inadequate, but it is the best I have to offer. My answer is: keep going.
我现在有一份好工作和良好的人际关系。现在认识我的人永远不会想到，我曾经是那个饥饿、痛苦、恐惧、被殴打的小女孩。至于我的家人，我妈妈还住在那个移动板房里。我的邻居早就死了。我的弟弟仍然和我母亲住在一起。他从未考过驾照，也从未找过工作。他不常出门。我有点理解他的不情愿——这个世界已经对你做了这么多，为什么还要让它再伤害你呢?但我希望他能抓住机会。我很难过，因为我们的童年几乎毁了他。如果你想知道如何度过难关，我的答案可能不够充分，但这是我能提供的最好的答案。我的回答是:继续前进。
As for my family, my mother still lives in that trailer. My neighbor is long dead. My older brother still lives with my mother. He has never gotten a driver's license or a job. He doesn't leave the house very often. A part of me understands his reluctance - why let the world do you more harm when it has already done so much? But I wish he would take the chance. I feel sad that our childhood all but destroyed him.
If you want to know how to get through hard things, my answer is probably inadequate, but it is the best I have to offer. My answer is: keep going.
我现在有一份好工作和良好的人际关系。现在认识我的人永远不会想到，我曾经是那个饥饿、痛苦、恐惧、被殴打的小女孩。至于我的家人，我妈妈还住在那个移动板房里。我的邻居早就死了。我的弟弟仍然和我母亲住在一起。他从未考过驾照，也从未找过工作。他不常出门。我有点理解他的不情愿——这个世界已经对你做了这么多，为什么还要让它再伤害你呢?但我希望他能抓住机会。我很难过，因为我们的童年几乎毁了他。如果你想知道如何度过难关，我的答案可能不够充分，但这是我能提供的最好的答案。我的回答是:继续前进。
Russell Backman
I was born blind.
All my life, I wanted to do things that others said were impossible because of my blindness. As a child, I used to run around, climb walls, and play PlayStation games. I didn't want to be like normal kids; I just loved to do what I loved doing, and in those years, blindness was not a factor that could prevent me. Not yet.
But slowly, that changed. Somehow I let society dictate what I could and could not do. My perception of my abilities started to shrink, bit by bit. I wanted to study music, but my parents convinced me I couldn't. I wanted to go to the UK, but my family convinced me that I couldn't live on my own. I wanted to learn horseback riding. Nope. Blind people can't do that, either.
我天生就是盲人。在我的一生中，我都想做一些别人认为因为我的失明而不可能做到的事情。小时候，我经常跑来跑去，爬墙，玩ps游戏。我不想和普通孩子一样;我只是喜欢做我喜欢做的事情，在那些年里，失明还没有成为阻碍我的一个因素。但慢慢地，情况发生了变化。不知何故，我让其他人决定了我能做什么和不能做什么。我对自己能力的认知开始一点一点地变弱。我想学音乐，但我父母说服我我不可能做到。我想去英国，但我的家人说服我我无法独自生活。我想学骑马，但盲人也做不到。
I was born blind.
All my life, I wanted to do things that others said were impossible because of my blindness. As a child, I used to run around, climb walls, and play PlayStation games. I didn't want to be like normal kids; I just loved to do what I loved doing, and in those years, blindness was not a factor that could prevent me. Not yet.
But slowly, that changed. Somehow I let society dictate what I could and could not do. My perception of my abilities started to shrink, bit by bit. I wanted to study music, but my parents convinced me I couldn't. I wanted to go to the UK, but my family convinced me that I couldn't live on my own. I wanted to learn horseback riding. Nope. Blind people can't do that, either.
我天生就是盲人。在我的一生中，我都想做一些别人认为因为我的失明而不可能做到的事情。小时候，我经常跑来跑去，爬墙，玩ps游戏。我不想和普通孩子一样;我只是喜欢做我喜欢做的事情，在那些年里，失明还没有成为阻碍我的一个因素。但慢慢地，情况发生了变化。不知何故，我让其他人决定了我能做什么和不能做什么。我对自己能力的认知开始一点一点地变弱。我想学音乐，但我父母说服我我不可能做到。我想去英国，但我的家人说服我我无法独自生活。我想学骑马，但盲人也做不到。
But when I was 15, I got fed up by those limiting circumstances. I decided to just do what I loved and fail and learn. That would be the worst outcome, and knowing this gave me confidence. I wasn't trying to be awesome. I just wanted to do what I loved doing.
So from then on, I changed again. I wanted to study mathematics. Everyone said I couldn't. But I did. I wanted to study software engineering. Everyone said I couldn't, and some professors even went as far as acting like i didn't exist. But I did. I wanted to get a job. Everyone said no one would hire me, but I was hired. I wanted to write a blog, but everyone said no one will read a blog without images, and then I wrote The post called Tools of a Blind Programmer and it proved, to me at least, that people do read posts without images.
Most of the time, when you lack something, people will smartly note all those things you can't do, and if you listen to them, you wouldn't ever be able to do it. However, if you have a plan B, it would give you the power to try, and either succeed or learn.
但当我15岁的时候，我受够了那些有限制的环境。我决定做我喜欢的事，哪怕失败后再学习，这也不过就是最糟糕的结果罢了，意识到这一点给了我信心。我没想变得很了不起。我只是想做我喜欢做的事。所以从那时起，我又变了。我想学数学。每个人都说我不可能做到。但我做到了。我想学软件工程。每个人都说我不可能做到，有些教授甚至表现得好像我不存在一样。但我做到了。我想找份工作。每个人都说没人会雇佣我，但我还是被雇佣了。我想写一篇博客，但每个人都说没有人会读没有图片的博客，然后我写了一篇名为《盲人程序员的工具》的文章，至少对我来说，它证明了人们确实会阅读没有图片的文章。大多数时候，当你缺少什么时，人们会巧妙地指出所有那些你做不到的事情，如果你听他们的话，你将永远无法做到。然而，如果你有一个B计划，它会给你尝试的勇气，要么成功，要么继续学习。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
So from then on, I changed again. I wanted to study mathematics. Everyone said I couldn't. But I did. I wanted to study software engineering. Everyone said I couldn't, and some professors even went as far as acting like i didn't exist. But I did. I wanted to get a job. Everyone said no one would hire me, but I was hired. I wanted to write a blog, but everyone said no one will read a blog without images, and then I wrote The post called Tools of a Blind Programmer and it proved, to me at least, that people do read posts without images.
Most of the time, when you lack something, people will smartly note all those things you can't do, and if you listen to them, you wouldn't ever be able to do it. However, if you have a plan B, it would give you the power to try, and either succeed or learn.
但当我15岁的时候，我受够了那些有限制的环境。我决定做我喜欢的事，哪怕失败后再学习，这也不过就是最糟糕的结果罢了，意识到这一点给了我信心。我没想变得很了不起。我只是想做我喜欢做的事。所以从那时起，我又变了。我想学数学。每个人都说我不可能做到。但我做到了。我想学软件工程。每个人都说我不可能做到，有些教授甚至表现得好像我不存在一样。但我做到了。我想找份工作。每个人都说没人会雇佣我，但我还是被雇佣了。我想写一篇博客，但每个人都说没有人会读没有图片的博客，然后我写了一篇名为《盲人程序员的工具》的文章，至少对我来说，它证明了人们确实会阅读没有图片的文章。大多数时候，当你缺少什么时，人们会巧妙地指出所有那些你做不到的事情，如果你听他们的话，你将永远无法做到。然而，如果你有一个B计划，它会给你尝试的勇气，要么成功，要么继续学习。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Mitchell Kenyon
My mom was a drug addict. Never met my dad. Heard he was a drug dealer, but i’m not sure.
Growing up, I spent a lot of time incarcerated. Was in Juvenile Boot Camps, Juvenile Detention Centers, and drug treatment more then a dozen times.
I wasn’t a bad kid, but my mom just couldn’t handle me.
我妈妈是个瘾君子。我从来没有见过我爸爸。听说他是毒贩，但我不确定。在成长过程中，我有很多时间是在被监禁中度过的。我曾被监禁在少年新兵训练营、少年看守所、戒毒所十几次。我不是个坏孩子，但我妈妈就是受不了我。
My mom was a drug addict. Never met my dad. Heard he was a drug dealer, but i’m not sure.
Growing up, I spent a lot of time incarcerated. Was in Juvenile Boot Camps, Juvenile Detention Centers, and drug treatment more then a dozen times.
I wasn’t a bad kid, but my mom just couldn’t handle me.
我妈妈是个瘾君子。我从来没有见过我爸爸。听说他是毒贩，但我不确定。在成长过程中，我有很多时间是在被监禁中度过的。我曾被监禁在少年新兵训练营、少年看守所、戒毒所十几次。我不是个坏孩子，但我妈妈就是受不了我。
As time went on, I found myself in more precarious situations. I got married when I was seventeen, and joined the military.
I went to war when I was seventeen, and seen a lot of things that I shouldn’t have. A lot of things that changed the way I perceive life. I tried to forget about them, but I just couldn’t.
Subconsciously, I was dead inside, but I fought. I fought, gripping a bottle for 15 years every waking day.
随着时间的推移，我发现自己处于更加不稳定的境地。我十七岁结婚，然后就参军了。十七岁就去打仗，见识了很多不该见的东西。很多事情改变了我对生活的看法。我试图忘记他们，但我做不到。潜意识里，我内心已死，但我抗争了。我挣扎了15年，每天醒着的时候都抱着酒瓶子。
I went to war when I was seventeen, and seen a lot of things that I shouldn’t have. A lot of things that changed the way I perceive life. I tried to forget about them, but I just couldn’t.
Subconsciously, I was dead inside, but I fought. I fought, gripping a bottle for 15 years every waking day.
随着时间的推移，我发现自己处于更加不稳定的境地。我十七岁结婚，然后就参军了。十七岁就去打仗，见识了很多不该见的东西。很多事情改变了我对生活的看法。我试图忘记他们，但我做不到。潜意识里，我内心已死，但我抗争了。我挣扎了15年，每天醒着的时候都抱着酒瓶子。
I somehow managed to survive and hold a job for a long time. I ended up in the oilfields, and then in Arizona. All over the place, running from my pain.
All of my relationships faded, and I found myself having fewer and fewer ways to cope.
我设法活了下来，并长期保持工作状态。我最终去了油田，然后去了亚利桑那州。到处乱跑，以逃避我的痛苦。我所有的人际关系都消失了，而我发现自己应对的方法越来越少。
All of my relationships faded, and I found myself having fewer and fewer ways to cope.
我设法活了下来，并长期保持工作状态。我最终去了油田，然后去了亚利桑那州。到处乱跑，以逃避我的痛苦。我所有的人际关系都消失了，而我发现自己应对的方法越来越少。
I ended up homeless at 27. I tried treatment again, but it only made things worse.
I remained homeless for 3 and a half years. I went to PTSD treatment several times, and tried so hard to find out what my purpose is in this life.
My friends from PTSD treatment started killing themselves, one by one. It became a common recurrence in my life. It seemed like every time I turned around, someone was killing themselves.
I knew if I didn’t change, I was going to die too.
我在27岁时无家可归。我再次尝试治疗，但这让事情变得更糟了。我无家可归了3年半。我曾多次接受创伤后应激障碍治疗，并非常努力地想要找到我生活的目标。我接受创伤后应激障碍治疗的朋友开始一个接一个地自杀。这在我的生活中成了家常便饭。好像每次我一转身，就有人在自杀。我知道如果我不改变，我也会死。
I remained homeless for 3 and a half years. I went to PTSD treatment several times, and tried so hard to find out what my purpose is in this life.
My friends from PTSD treatment started killing themselves, one by one. It became a common recurrence in my life. It seemed like every time I turned around, someone was killing themselves.
I knew if I didn’t change, I was going to die too.
我在27岁时无家可归。我再次尝试治疗，但这让事情变得更糟了。我无家可归了3年半。我曾多次接受创伤后应激障碍治疗，并非常努力地想要找到我生活的目标。我接受创伤后应激障碍治疗的朋友开始一个接一个地自杀。这在我的生活中成了家常便饭。好像每次我一转身，就有人在自杀。我知道如果我不改变，我也会死。
I was asleep at my Aunt Kerry’s house, after an 8 day meth binge. I started on coke. 6 months later I ran out of money so I started using heroin. And finally meth. Anything to numb the pain really.
My daughter wanted nothing to do with me. I hadn’t talked to my stepdad for 8 months. I had cleaned out my mom’s garage on a pawn run, so she was upset with me. Basically, they were sick of being my babysitter.
经过8天的冰D狂欢后，我在克里阿姨的家里睡着了。我开始的时候吸食KK因。6个月后，我的钱花光了，所以我开始吸食HL因。最后是冰D。只要能麻痹痛苦就行。我的女儿不想和我有任何关系。我已经8个月没有和我的继父说话了。我把我妈妈的车库中所有的东西都拿去典当了，所以她对我很不高兴。基本上，他们厌倦了当我的保姆。
My daughter wanted nothing to do with me. I hadn’t talked to my stepdad for 8 months. I had cleaned out my mom’s garage on a pawn run, so she was upset with me. Basically, they were sick of being my babysitter.
经过8天的冰D狂欢后，我在克里阿姨的家里睡着了。我开始的时候吸食KK因。6个月后，我的钱花光了，所以我开始吸食HL因。最后是冰D。只要能麻痹痛苦就行。我的女儿不想和我有任何关系。我已经8个月没有和我的继父说话了。我把我妈妈的车库中所有的东西都拿去典当了，所以她对我很不高兴。基本上，他们厌倦了当我的保姆。
Everything was gone. I had nothing left.
I had worn the same clothes everyday for a year. My face had aged 10 years in 6 months. I knew that in order to survive, I had to change ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING about my life. So that’s what I did.
I learned a lot of valuable lessons in a short period of time.
一切都消失了。我一无所有。一年来，我每天都穿同样的衣服。我的脸在6个月内老了10岁。我知道为了生存，我必须彻底改变我生活中的一切。这就是我所需要做的。我在很短的时间内学到了很多宝贵的经验。
I had worn the same clothes everyday for a year. My face had aged 10 years in 6 months. I knew that in order to survive, I had to change ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING about my life. So that’s what I did.
I learned a lot of valuable lessons in a short period of time.
一切都消失了。我一无所有。一年来，我每天都穿同样的衣服。我的脸在6个月内老了10岁。我知道为了生存，我必须彻底改变我生活中的一切。这就是我所需要做的。我在很短的时间内学到了很多宝贵的经验。
Nobody cares about you as much as you think.
Every time you get a craving to use drugs and alcohol, it is really and escape mechanism and the same result can be obtained by talking about your feelings.
Men do cry, and it is necessary to cleanse your soul.
Always take care of your mom, because no matter what happens in life, she will always try her best to love you.
I quit smoking.
I started eating healthy and working out.
I worked diligently to improve the relationships with my family members.
I told myself affirmations and meditated on a daily basis.
I enrolled in college and made it a commitment to continue to learn on a daily basis.
没有人像你想的那样在乎你。每次你渴望使用药物和酒精时，它确实是一种逃避机制，通过谈论你的感受可以获得同样的效果。男人是会哭的，净化你的灵魂是必要的。永远照顾好你的妈妈，因为无论生活中发生什么，她都会尽她最大的努力来爱你。我戒烟了。我开始健康饮食和锻炼。我努力改善与家人的关系。我每天都对自己说一些肯定的话，并进行冥想。我上了大学，并承诺每天继续学习。
Every time you get a craving to use drugs and alcohol, it is really and escape mechanism and the same result can be obtained by talking about your feelings.
Men do cry, and it is necessary to cleanse your soul.
Always take care of your mom, because no matter what happens in life, she will always try her best to love you.
I quit smoking.
I started eating healthy and working out.
I worked diligently to improve the relationships with my family members.
I told myself affirmations and meditated on a daily basis.
I enrolled in college and made it a commitment to continue to learn on a daily basis.
没有人像你想的那样在乎你。每次你渴望使用药物和酒精时，它确实是一种逃避机制，通过谈论你的感受可以获得同样的效果。男人是会哭的，净化你的灵魂是必要的。永远照顾好你的妈妈，因为无论生活中发生什么，她都会尽她最大的努力来爱你。我戒烟了。我开始健康饮食和锻炼。我努力改善与家人的关系。我每天都对自己说一些肯定的话，并进行冥想。我上了大学，并承诺每天继续学习。
The main point i’m trying to make here is to never give up. I truly believe that a higher power is leading our journey, whatever that higher power may be. To me, this life is everlasting, and I will spend the rest of my time chasing the light at the end of the rainbow that I was shown in my darkest times. I was put through these tribulations to be shown that you cannot have light without first having darkness.
我在这里想说的重点是永不放弃。我真的相信有一种更强的力量正在引领我们的旅程，无论这种更强的力量是什么。对我来说，这种生活是永恒的，我将用余生去追逐在我最黑暗的时候看到的彩虹尽头的光。我经历这些磨难是为了让我看到，没有黑暗就没有光明。
我在这里想说的重点是永不放弃。我真的相信有一种更强的力量正在引领我们的旅程，无论这种更强的力量是什么。对我来说，这种生活是永恒的，我将用余生去追逐在我最黑暗的时候看到的彩虹尽头的光。我经历这些磨难是为了让我看到，没有黑暗就没有光明。
Lorri Robinson
The hardest thing I went through in life was September 13, 1969.
I was living at my childhood home in Ohio with my parents at the time. I had recently married my high school sweetheart, Doug Kempf, in January of 1969.
In our hearts we were still newlyweds, but Uncle Sam had other plans for Doug, a trained Army combat medic. In May, he was sent to Vietnam.
我一生中经历的最艰难的事情是1969年9月13日。当时我和父母住在俄亥俄州我儿时的家里。1969年1月，我刚和我的高中恋人道格.肯普夫结婚了。在我们心里，我们还是新婚夫妇，但山姆大叔对道格另有打算，道格是一名训练有素的陆军战地医生。5月，他被派往了越南。
The hardest thing I went through in life was September 13, 1969.
I was living at my childhood home in Ohio with my parents at the time. I had recently married my high school sweetheart, Doug Kempf, in January of 1969.
In our hearts we were still newlyweds, but Uncle Sam had other plans for Doug, a trained Army combat medic. In May, he was sent to Vietnam.
我一生中经历的最艰难的事情是1969年9月13日。当时我和父母住在俄亥俄州我儿时的家里。1969年1月，我刚和我的高中恋人道格.肯普夫结婚了。在我们心里，我们还是新婚夫妇，但山姆大叔对道格另有打算，道格是一名训练有素的陆军战地医生。5月，他被派往了越南。
Doug and I shared a beautiful life from January to May. During the months before he left for Vietnam, we lived in a mobile home on base at Ft. Bragg, Fayetteville, North Carolina.
We were military-poor but we didn't care. We were together and we were happy. There, we loved and laughed and planned our future for when he returned.
We would buy an old Victorian with lots of bedrooms, oak woodwork, a huge kitchen for entertaining family and friends, and a large front porch with a wooden swing. There we could cuddle and talk, read a book, or just swing and watch thunderstorms together.
从1月到5月，道格和我过着美好的生活。在他前往越南之前的几个月里，我们住在北卡罗来纳州布拉格堡的一间活动板房里。我们很穷，但我们不在乎。我们在一起很快乐。在那里，我们爱着，笑着，并计划着他回来后我们的未来。我们可能会买一套维多利亚时代的老房子，里面有很多卧室，橡木制品，一个用来招待家人和朋友的大厨房，还有一个带木秋千的大前廊。在那里我们可以拥抱聊天，读书，或者只是一起一边荡秋千，一边看雷雨。
We were military-poor but we didn't care. We were together and we were happy. There, we loved and laughed and planned our future for when he returned.
We would buy an old Victorian with lots of bedrooms, oak woodwork, a huge kitchen for entertaining family and friends, and a large front porch with a wooden swing. There we could cuddle and talk, read a book, or just swing and watch thunderstorms together.
从1月到5月，道格和我过着美好的生活。在他前往越南之前的几个月里，我们住在北卡罗来纳州布拉格堡的一间活动板房里。我们很穷，但我们不在乎。我们在一起很快乐。在那里，我们爱着，笑着，并计划着他回来后我们的未来。我们可能会买一套维多利亚时代的老房子，里面有很多卧室，橡木制品，一个用来招待家人和朋友的大厨房，还有一个带木秋千的大前廊。在那里我们可以拥抱聊天，读书，或者只是一起一边荡秋千，一边看雷雨。
We wanted three children. Two boys and a girl would be perfect. Our sons would be tall and handsome with their daddy's bowed legs, legs that loved to dance, and they would have his sense of humor and infectious laugh.
Our sons would grow up to be good men, looked up to for their strength of character. Like Doug, they would be smart, kind and gentle husbands, loving and playful with their children, as well as proud and fiercely patriotic.
Doug decided our little girl would be, (in his words), "Pretty like her mommy, with big blue eyes and just a hint of tomboy to defend herself from her big brothers." In my heart, I knew she would always be daddy's little girl.
我们想要三个孩子。如果是两个男孩和一个女孩就完美了。我们的儿子会又高又帅，有他们爸爸的粗细有致的，喜欢跳舞的腿，他们会有他的幽默感和富有感染力的笑声。我们的儿子长大后会成为好人，因为他们坚强的性格而受到尊敬。像道格一样，他们会是聪明、善良、温柔的丈夫，对孩子充满爱，同时也是骄傲和强烈的爱国主义者。道格认为我们的小女儿应该(用他的话来说)“像她妈妈一样漂亮，有一双蓝色的大眼睛，还有一点假小子的气质，可以保护自己不受哥哥们的欺负。”在我心里，我知道她永远会是爸爸的小女儿。
Our sons would grow up to be good men, looked up to for their strength of character. Like Doug, they would be smart, kind and gentle husbands, loving and playful with their children, as well as proud and fiercely patriotic.
Doug decided our little girl would be, (in his words), "Pretty like her mommy, with big blue eyes and just a hint of tomboy to defend herself from her big brothers." In my heart, I knew she would always be daddy's little girl.
我们想要三个孩子。如果是两个男孩和一个女孩就完美了。我们的儿子会又高又帅，有他们爸爸的粗细有致的，喜欢跳舞的腿，他们会有他的幽默感和富有感染力的笑声。我们的儿子长大后会成为好人，因为他们坚强的性格而受到尊敬。像道格一样，他们会是聪明、善良、温柔的丈夫，对孩子充满爱，同时也是骄傲和强烈的爱国主义者。道格认为我们的小女儿应该(用他的话来说)“像她妈妈一样漂亮，有一双蓝色的大眼睛，还有一点假小子的气质，可以保护自己不受哥哥们的欺负。”在我心里，我知道她永远会是爸爸的小女儿。
Saying goodbye at the Columbus Airport in May, was soul-crushing. I promised myself I wouldn't cry, but it was a foolish promise and one I wasn't able to keep. One thing I can truthfully say is, it never once occurred to me that Doug wouldn't return home safe.
Our letters were happy and full of love. The intimate moments we had shared and memorized were yearned for and always included in the letters between us. But on September 13, 1969, my world stopped.
5月在哥伦布机场告别时，我的心都碎了。我向自己保证不哭，但这是一个愚蠢的承诺，我没能做到。我可以诚实地说的一件事是，我从来没有想过道格不会安全地回到家。我们之间的信里充满了幸福和爱。我们所分享和回忆的亲密时刻令人向往，并且始终贯穿在我们之间的信件内容中。但1969年9月13日，我的世界停止了。
Our letters were happy and full of love. The intimate moments we had shared and memorized were yearned for and always included in the letters between us. But on September 13, 1969, my world stopped.
5月在哥伦布机场告别时，我的心都碎了。我向自己保证不哭，但这是一个愚蠢的承诺，我没能做到。我可以诚实地说的一件事是，我从来没有想过道格不会安全地回到家。我们之间的信里充满了幸福和爱。我们所分享和回忆的亲密时刻令人向往，并且始终贯穿在我们之间的信件内容中。但1969年9月13日，我的世界停止了。
I was working as a secretary in the office of a manufacturing company a few blocks from my parents' home. That afternoon, mother called me at work. "Honey, you'd better come home. There are some men here from the Army and they need to talk to you about Doug."
I couldn't say a word. I dropped the phone on my desk and with my heart in my throat, I ran out of the building. I didn't stop running until three blocks later, in front of the house where I grew up, the home where I had always felt so safe and loved.
I was filled with fear and dread. Parked in front of the house and looking out of place, was a large black car with something printed along the side. I gathered my courage and climbed the front steps to the front door.
我当时在一家制造公司的办公室做秘书，离我父母家只有几个街区。那天下午，妈妈在我上班的时候给我打电话。“亲爱的，你最好回家来，这儿有几个军队的人，他们要跟你谈谈道格的事。”我一句话也说不出来。我把电话丢在桌子上，心都提到嗓子眼了。我跑出了大楼，一直跑到三个街区后才停了下来，跑到了我从小长大的房子前面，这个我一直感到安全和被爱的家。我心里充满了恐惧。房子前面停着一辆黑色的大轿车，看上去很不相称，车的侧面印着什么东西。我鼓起勇气，走上前门的台阶。
I couldn't say a word. I dropped the phone on my desk and with my heart in my throat, I ran out of the building. I didn't stop running until three blocks later, in front of the house where I grew up, the home where I had always felt so safe and loved.
I was filled with fear and dread. Parked in front of the house and looking out of place, was a large black car with something printed along the side. I gathered my courage and climbed the front steps to the front door.
我当时在一家制造公司的办公室做秘书，离我父母家只有几个街区。那天下午，妈妈在我上班的时候给我打电话。“亲爱的，你最好回家来，这儿有几个军队的人，他们要跟你谈谈道格的事。”我一句话也说不出来。我把电话丢在桌子上，心都提到嗓子眼了。我跑出了大楼，一直跑到三个街区后才停了下来，跑到了我从小长大的房子前面，这个我一直感到安全和被爱的家。我心里充满了恐惧。房子前面停着一辆黑色的大轿车，看上去很不相称，车的侧面印着什么东西。我鼓起勇气，走上前门的台阶。
Just inside, in the foyer stood two uniformed men locked to attention. Their hands were behind their backs, hats tucked under an arm. Their faces were somber.
Daddy and mama stood nearby. Daddy had his arm around Mama's waist and she was crying softly.
[No. No. No. Dear God, why are they here? No, wait, I don't want to know. Go away! Please, please just go away.]
"Mrs. Kempf, we regret to inform you that your husband, Sp4 Douglas S. Kempf, was killed in action while performing his duty as a combat medic in Vietnam on September 5 ..."
I didn't hear the rest of what the man had to say. Daddy said I fainted where I stood, just inside the front door in the foyer.
就在里面的门厅里站着两个穿制服的人。他们的手放在背后，帽子夹在胳膊下，脸色阴沉。爸爸妈妈就站在旁边。爸爸搂着妈妈的腰，她在轻声哭泣。(不。不。不。亲爱的上帝啊，他们为什么在这里?不，等等，我不想知道。走开!求求你，求求你走开。）“肯普夫夫人，我们遗憾地通知您，您的丈夫道格拉斯·s·肯普夫于9月5日在越南执行战地医疗任务时牺牲……”我没听到那人接下来说的话。爸爸说我站在那里晕倒了，就在前门的门厅里。
Daddy and mama stood nearby. Daddy had his arm around Mama's waist and she was crying softly.
[No. No. No. Dear God, why are they here? No, wait, I don't want to know. Go away! Please, please just go away.]
"Mrs. Kempf, we regret to inform you that your husband, Sp4 Douglas S. Kempf, was killed in action while performing his duty as a combat medic in Vietnam on September 5 ..."
I didn't hear the rest of what the man had to say. Daddy said I fainted where I stood, just inside the front door in the foyer.
就在里面的门厅里站着两个穿制服的人。他们的手放在背后，帽子夹在胳膊下，脸色阴沉。爸爸妈妈就站在旁边。爸爸搂着妈妈的腰，她在轻声哭泣。(不。不。不。亲爱的上帝啊，他们为什么在这里?不，等等，我不想知道。走开!求求你，求求你走开。）“肯普夫夫人，我们遗憾地通知您，您的丈夫道格拉斯·s·肯普夫于9月5日在越南执行战地医疗任务时牺牲……”我没听到那人接下来说的话。爸爸说我站在那里晕倒了，就在前门的门厅里。
When I came around, I was lying on the couch in my parents' living room -—and then I remembered. Oh God, I remembered, and I wanted to die, too. I was devoid of all feeling, except soul-numbing grief.
My whole world had turned upside down. How could everything still look and sound so normal?
The sun still shined through the front windows with Mama's white curtains swaying in a light breeze. The birds still chirped outside in the old apple tree I used to climb as a child. Somewhere, a neighbor was mowing his lawn, and I could hear children laughing and playing in their yards.
当我苏醒过来时，我正躺在父母客厅的沙发上——然后我想起来了之前发生的事。天啊，我想起来了，我也想去死。我没有任何感觉，除了令人麻木的悲伤。我感到我的整个世界都颠倒了。但为什么一切看起来听起来都那么正常?阳光仍然透过前窗照进来，妈妈的白色窗帘在微风中摇曳。鸟儿还在外面那棵我小时候常爬的老苹果树上啁啾。不知在什么地方，一位邻居正在修剪他的草坪，我听到孩子们在院子里嬉笑玩耍。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
My whole world had turned upside down. How could everything still look and sound so normal?
The sun still shined through the front windows with Mama's white curtains swaying in a light breeze. The birds still chirped outside in the old apple tree I used to climb as a child. Somewhere, a neighbor was mowing his lawn, and I could hear children laughing and playing in their yards.
当我苏醒过来时，我正躺在父母客厅的沙发上——然后我想起来了之前发生的事。天啊，我想起来了，我也想去死。我没有任何感觉，除了令人麻木的悲伤。我感到我的整个世界都颠倒了。但为什么一切看起来听起来都那么正常?阳光仍然透过前窗照进来，妈妈的白色窗帘在微风中摇曳。鸟儿还在外面那棵我小时候常爬的老苹果树上啁啾。不知在什么地方，一位邻居正在修剪他的草坪，我听到孩子们在院子里嬉笑玩耍。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Only a few minutes ago, that had been real. Now it all clashed with a new reality and I felt I was losing my mind.
Why? Why?
Then I focused hard, until only the couch was real. I was on the couch where Doug and I first held hands and hugged; the couch where we had our first disagreement, then kissed and made up. The same couch where I often sat in front of him on the floor while we watched TV and he ran his fingers gently through my hair. The same couch where he nervously asked me to be his wife and I said I would.
就在几分钟前，这还是真的。而现在，这一切都与新的现实发生了冲突，我觉得自己快要疯了。为什么?为什么?然后我努力集中注意力，直到感觉到只有沙发是真实的。在沙发上，道格和我第一次手牵着手拥抱;我们第一次吵架，然后接吻并和好。我们一起看电视时，我经常坐在他坐的沙发前的地板上，他的手指轻轻拨弄我的头发。就在那个沙发上，他紧张地要我做他的妻子，我说我愿意。
Why? Why?
Then I focused hard, until only the couch was real. I was on the couch where Doug and I first held hands and hugged; the couch where we had our first disagreement, then kissed and made up. The same couch where I often sat in front of him on the floor while we watched TV and he ran his fingers gently through my hair. The same couch where he nervously asked me to be his wife and I said I would.
就在几分钟前，这还是真的。而现在，这一切都与新的现实发生了冲突，我觉得自己快要疯了。为什么?为什么?然后我努力集中注意力，直到感觉到只有沙发是真实的。在沙发上，道格和我第一次手牵着手拥抱;我们第一次吵架，然后接吻并和好。我们一起看电视时，我经常坐在他坐的沙发前的地板上，他的手指轻轻拨弄我的头发。就在那个沙发上，他紧张地要我做他的妻子，我说我愿意。
No, nothing would ever be the same again. My life was changed forever and I felt helpless and so alone, though I was surrounded by people who cared and also grieved.
All I could do was cry, and I remember fighting a growing anger, as well. God, how could You do this? Why would You reach down inside me and rip out my heart? And always, the question, Why?
There was so much grief and hurt and I went through the following weeks, months and even years in a fog. There are some things about that time I can't remember at all, but there is one thing I will never forget. That was the first and only time I ever saw my father cry.
不，一切都不一样了。我的生活被永远地改变了，我感到无助和孤独，尽管我周围的人都关心我，也为我感到悲伤。我所能做的就是哭泣，我记得我也在与与日俱增的愤怒作斗争。上帝，你怎么能这样做?为什么你要深入我的身体并撕碎我的心?我总是会发出这样的问题:为什么?在接下来的几周、几个月甚至几年里，我都是在迷茫中度过的。关于那段时间，有些事情我完全不记得了，但有一件事我永远不会忘记。那是我第一次也是唯一一次看到父亲哭。
All I could do was cry, and I remember fighting a growing anger, as well. God, how could You do this? Why would You reach down inside me and rip out my heart? And always, the question, Why?
There was so much grief and hurt and I went through the following weeks, months and even years in a fog. There are some things about that time I can't remember at all, but there is one thing I will never forget. That was the first and only time I ever saw my father cry.
不，一切都不一样了。我的生活被永远地改变了，我感到无助和孤独，尽管我周围的人都关心我，也为我感到悲伤。我所能做的就是哭泣，我记得我也在与与日俱增的愤怒作斗争。上帝，你怎么能这样做?为什么你要深入我的身体并撕碎我的心?我总是会发出这样的问题:为什么?在接下来的几周、几个月甚至几年里，我都是在迷茫中度过的。关于那段时间，有些事情我完全不记得了，但有一件事我永远不会忘记。那是我第一次也是唯一一次看到父亲哭。
That day in 1969 was the worst day of my life. But, in the years since, that day has carried me through some other bad times, too.
There have been things that happened since then when I've said, "This hurts. Yeah, this really hurts -—it hurts like bloody hell! But I will survive, because I know what REAL hurt is."
For the rest of my life, that one day became my yardstick for measuring pain. I knew with a final certainty that nothing else could, or ever would, hurt me that bad again.
When I look up in the night sky, it isn't stars I see, but little openings in heaven's floor where the love of my lost one pours through and shines down to let me know he is happy ...
Addendum:
C.J. Heck's answer to What is the most humane gesture you have ever encountered?
1969年的那一天是我一生中最糟糕的一天。但是，在后来的几年里，那一天也陪我度过了其他一些糟糕的时光。从那以后发生了一些事情，我说:“这很痛苦。是啊，真的很痛苦，痛苦得要命!但我会活下去，因为我知道什么是真正的伤害。”在我的余生中，那一天会成为我衡量痛苦的标准。我非常肯定地知道，再没有别的东西能，也永远不会再像现在这样伤害我了。当我仰望夜空时，我看到的不是星星，而是天堂的地板上的小缺口，我失去的爱人的爱从那里倾泻而出，照耀着我，让我知道他是幸福的……
There have been things that happened since then when I've said, "This hurts. Yeah, this really hurts -—it hurts like bloody hell! But I will survive, because I know what REAL hurt is."
For the rest of my life, that one day became my yardstick for measuring pain. I knew with a final certainty that nothing else could, or ever would, hurt me that bad again.
When I look up in the night sky, it isn't stars I see, but little openings in heaven's floor where the love of my lost one pours through and shines down to let me know he is happy ...
Addendum:
C.J. Heck's answer to What is the most humane gesture you have ever encountered?
1969年的那一天是我一生中最糟糕的一天。但是，在后来的几年里，那一天也陪我度过了其他一些糟糕的时光。从那以后发生了一些事情，我说:“这很痛苦。是啊，真的很痛苦，痛苦得要命!但我会活下去，因为我知道什么是真正的伤害。”在我的余生中，那一天会成为我衡量痛苦的标准。我非常肯定地知道，再没有别的东西能，也永远不会再像现在这样伤害我了。当我仰望夜空时，我看到的不是星星，而是天堂的地板上的小缺口，我失去的爱人的爱从那里倾泻而出，照耀着我，让我知道他是幸福的……
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