有哪些原因可以解释为什么印度人出国定居时会感到沮丧?（二）
正文翻译
What are some reasons to explain why Indians get depressed when they go abroad to settle?
有哪些原因可以解释为什么印度人出国定居时会感到沮丧?
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
有哪些原因可以解释为什么印度人出国定居时会感到沮丧?
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
评论翻译
Sunil Umesh
I am an Indian man living in Australia, and although I am happier here than I was in India, I have no social life here which sometimes makes me depressed.
I suffer from severe social anxiety and social awkwardness. And it's nearly impossible for me to ‘just go out and meet people’ as most advise me to. I have pushed myself to try and socialise here, but it never worked and I just ended up feeling lost, miserable and disappointed every single time.
I wasn't social back in India too, but I had a small handful of friends I obtained during childhood (I was too young to have social anxiety then, and I hardly made close friends after school). And of course, I had my family as well so my social anxiety kind of got ‘masked’.
But once I moved abroad, reality hit me - harder than a sledgehammer in full force. I knew absolutely no one, and my issues made it impossible to find people to mingle with. I tried to show false bravado by claiming that I need no one and I am better off alone, but that didn't work for long. So yes, this did often make me depressed.
I have kind of gotten used to this by now (I live by myself) but I still sometimes wish I had company.'
我是一个住在澳大利亚的印度人，虽然我在这里比在印度更快乐，但我在这里没有社交生活，这有时会让我感到沮丧。
我患有严重的社交焦虑和社交尴尬。我几乎不可能像大多数人建议的那样“出去见见人”。我强迫自己尝试在这里社交，但从来没有成功过，每次我都感到迷茫、痛苦和失望。
在印度的时候，我也不擅长社交，但我有几个儿时结识的朋友(那时我还太小，没有社交焦虑症，放学后也几乎没有交过亲密的朋友)。当然，我也有我的家人，所以我的社交焦虑被“掩盖”了。
但当我搬到国外后，现实打击了我——比大锤猛烈的打击还要猛烈。我一个人也不认识，我的问题使我无法找到可以交往的人。我试图假装虚张声势，声称我不需要任何人，我一个人过得更好，但这并没有持续太久。所以，是的，这确实经常让我沮丧。
我现在已经习惯了这种生活(我一个人住)，但有时我还是希望有人陪伴。
Anonymous
Most Indian’s who try to make it big abroad predominantly come from Middle class backgrounds. The problem is that most people will publicly deny this but everyone’s here just to escape the India. Everyone’s simply fed up of life back home where you slog your ass off 6 days a week at a job you hate and the mediocre house you live in and the crappy salary that you are making . This group has it the worst. We believe that moving to North America is the solution to every problem of ours. What first hits you when you move here is that, you have to start from the very scratch. None of the things from the past matter anymore. Makes you think that your life has been a joke. Most people have a lot of debt . One by one when things dont go as planned, the worry starts to pile. The phone calls to India reduce and then begins the saga of depression. You start getting a weird sense of calm inside you and as every dollar you spend the more anxious you get. Then begins the saga of lies, You lie to your loved ones back at home that everything’s going but all you really want to do is catch the next available flight and go back home.
大多数试图在国外取得成功的印度人主要来自中产阶级。问题是，大多数人会公开否认这一点，但每个人来这里只是为了逃离印度。每个人都受够了家乡的生活，在那里你一周工作6天，做着你讨厌的工作，住着平庸的房子，拿着糟糕的薪水。这个群体的情况最糟。我们相信，搬到北美是解决我们所有问题的办法。当你搬到这里的时候，首先让你感到震惊的是，你必须从头开始。过去的事都不重要了。让你觉得你的人生就是个笑话。大多数人都有很多债务。当事情一个接一个地没有按计划进行时，忧虑开始堆积。打到印度的电话减少了，然后开始经历沮丧。你的内心开始有一种奇怪的平静感，因为你花的每一美元都让你更加焦虑。然后开始了一连串谎言，你对在家里的爱人撒谎，说一切都很顺利，但你真正想做的是赶下一班航班回家。
Most Indian’s who try to make it big abroad predominantly come from Middle class backgrounds. The problem is that most people will publicly deny this but everyone’s here just to escape the India. Everyone’s simply fed up of life back home where you slog your ass off 6 days a week at a job you hate and the mediocre house you live in and the crappy salary that you are making . This group has it the worst. We believe that moving to North America is the solution to every problem of ours. What first hits you when you move here is that, you have to start from the very scratch. None of the things from the past matter anymore. Makes you think that your life has been a joke. Most people have a lot of debt . One by one when things dont go as planned, the worry starts to pile. The phone calls to India reduce and then begins the saga of depression. You start getting a weird sense of calm inside you and as every dollar you spend the more anxious you get. Then begins the saga of lies, You lie to your loved ones back at home that everything’s going but all you really want to do is catch the next available flight and go back home.
大多数试图在国外取得成功的印度人主要来自中产阶级。问题是，大多数人会公开否认这一点，但每个人来这里只是为了逃离印度。每个人都受够了家乡的生活，在那里你一周工作6天，做着你讨厌的工作，住着平庸的房子，拿着糟糕的薪水。这个群体的情况最糟。我们相信，搬到北美是解决我们所有问题的办法。当你搬到这里的时候，首先让你感到震惊的是，你必须从头开始。过去的事都不重要了。让你觉得你的人生就是个笑话。大多数人都有很多债务。当事情一个接一个地没有按计划进行时，忧虑开始堆积。打到印度的电话减少了，然后开始经历沮丧。你的内心开始有一种奇怪的平静感，因为你花的每一美元都让你更加焦虑。然后开始了一连串谎言，你对在家里的爱人撒谎，说一切都很顺利，但你真正想做的是赶下一班航班回家。
Sunil Umesh
I am an Indian man living in Australia, and although I am happier here than I was in India, I have no social life here which sometimes makes me depressed.
I suffer from severe social anxiety and social awkwardness. And it's nearly impossible for me to ‘just go out and meet people’ as most advise me to. I have pushed myself to try and socialise here, but it never worked and I just ended up feeling lost, miserable and disappointed every single time.
I wasn't social back in India too, but I had a small handful of friends I obtained during childhood (I was too young to have social anxiety then, and I hardly made close friends after school). And of course, I had my family as well so my social anxiety kind of got ‘masked’.
But once I moved abroad, reality hit me - harder than a sledgehammer in full force. I knew absolutely no one, and my issues made it impossible to find people to mingle with. I tried to show false bravado by claiming that I need no one and I am better off alone, but that didn't work for long. So yes, this did often make me depressed.
I have kind of gotten used to this by now (I live by myself) but I still sometimes wish I had company.'
我是一个住在澳大利亚的印度人，虽然我在这里比在印度更快乐，但我在这里没有社交生活，这有时会让我感到沮丧。
我患有严重的社交焦虑和社交尴尬。我几乎不可能像大多数人建议的那样“出去见见人”。我强迫自己尝试在这里社交，但从来没有成功过，每次我都感到迷茫、痛苦和失望。
在印度的时候，我也不擅长社交，但我有几个儿时结识的朋友(那时我还太小，没有社交焦虑症，放学后也几乎没有交过亲密的朋友)。当然，我也有我的家人，所以我的社交焦虑被“掩盖”了。
但当我搬到国外后，现实打击了我——比大锤猛烈的打击还要猛烈。我一个人也不认识，我的问题使我无法找到可以交往的人。我试图假装虚张声势，声称我不需要任何人，我一个人过得更好，但这并没有持续太久。所以，是的，这确实经常让我沮丧。
我现在已经习惯了这种生活(我一个人住)，但有时我还是希望有人陪伴。
Srinath Srinivasa
I went to study and live in Germany, many years ago, of my own will and choice. The experience was wonderful and I loved the country and the culture. Despite being an introvert, I had made lots of friends there and still keep in touch with several of them.
However, the happiest day of my life there was the day when I was returning to India for good.
I first thought it is because my extended family still lived in India. However, over the years, much of my immediate family members relocated abroad and most of my life back in India is now spent alone. So much so that, I came back to a city in which I was once born and spent my childhood, but which had become totally alien to me. I could not relate to anything and could not even speak my mother tongue there.
Not to mention, life in India has also been much more of a struggle and rife with politics, than the fairly straightforward life I had abroad.
Despite this, whenever I travel abroad, I feel happy returning back to India.
许多年前，出于我自己的意愿和选择，我去了德国学习和生活。这次经历很棒，我喜欢这个国家和它的文化。尽管我是一个内向的人，但我在那里交了很多朋友，并且仍然和他们中的一些人保持着联系。
然而，我一生中最快乐的一天是我永远回到印度的那一天。
我一开始以为是因为我的大家庭还住在印度。然而，多年来，我的大部分直系亲属都搬到了国外，现在我在印度的大部分时间都是一个人度过的。因此，我回到了一个我曾经出生并度过童年的城市，但它对我来说已经完全陌生了。在那里，我什么都听不懂，甚至不会说母语。
更不用说，与我在国外相当直截了当的生活相比，印度的生活更像是一场斗争，充斥着政治。
尽管如此，每当我出国旅行时，我都很高兴回到印度。
I went to study and live in Germany, many years ago, of my own will and choice. The experience was wonderful and I loved the country and the culture. Despite being an introvert, I had made lots of friends there and still keep in touch with several of them.
However, the happiest day of my life there was the day when I was returning to India for good.
I first thought it is because my extended family still lived in India. However, over the years, much of my immediate family members relocated abroad and most of my life back in India is now spent alone. So much so that, I came back to a city in which I was once born and spent my childhood, but which had become totally alien to me. I could not relate to anything and could not even speak my mother tongue there.
Not to mention, life in India has also been much more of a struggle and rife with politics, than the fairly straightforward life I had abroad.
Despite this, whenever I travel abroad, I feel happy returning back to India.
许多年前，出于我自己的意愿和选择，我去了德国学习和生活。这次经历很棒，我喜欢这个国家和它的文化。尽管我是一个内向的人，但我在那里交了很多朋友，并且仍然和他们中的一些人保持着联系。
然而，我一生中最快乐的一天是我永远回到印度的那一天。
我一开始以为是因为我的大家庭还住在印度。然而，多年来，我的大部分直系亲属都搬到了国外，现在我在印度的大部分时间都是一个人度过的。因此，我回到了一个我曾经出生并度过童年的城市，但它对我来说已经完全陌生了。在那里，我什么都听不懂，甚至不会说母语。
更不用说，与我在国外相当直截了当的生活相比，印度的生活更像是一场斗争，充斥着政治。
尽管如此，每当我出国旅行时，我都很高兴回到印度。
It is hard to explain why this is so. Here is what I have understood. The “developed” world lives by the head, while India lives by the heart. In the world outside, social harmony is seen as essential for economic wealth, while in popular Indian thought economic wealth is seen as essential for social harmony. In the world outside, philosophers sit in ivory towers of universities and governments; while in India everybody is a philosopher. Given a practical problem, India wants to understand the underlying philosophy, while the rest of the world wants to just solve the stupid problem and get along with life.
Indian culture has an uncanny knack to win over people by frustrating and nauseating them with its goody-goody sense of apparent naivety.
In a single working day in India, I would have interacted with ultra-rich and ultra-poor; with hard-nosed pragmatism and sublime spiritual wisdom; felt a deep sense of peace and a deep sense of depression.
We keep encountering basic existential questions all the time. And life just keeps hitting you from all sides, overwhelming our senses and faculty of thought.
When we relocate to a developed country, suddenly everything is so quiet.. And there is this big emptiness.. Life feels so.. cute and naive?
很难解释为什么会这样。以下是我所理解的。发达国家靠头脑生活，而印度靠心灵生活。在外界，社会和谐被视为经济财富的关键，而在印度流行的思想中，经济财富被视为社会和谐的关键。在外面的世界里，哲学家们坐在大学和政府的象牙塔里；而在印度，每个人都是哲学家。考虑到一个实际问题，印度想了解其背后的哲学，而世界其他国家只想解决这个愚蠢的问题，与生活和解。
印度文化有一种不可思议的技巧，通过表面上的天真，让人感到沮丧和恶心，从而赢得人们的支持。
在印度的一个工作日里，我就会与超级富豪和超级穷人互动——务实的态度，崇高的精神智慧；感到一种深深的平静和深深的沮丧感。
我们总是遇到一些基本的生存问题。生活不断从四面八方打击你，压倒我们的感官和思维能力。
当我们搬到一个发达国家后，突然间一切都变得如此安静。有一种巨大的空虚…感觉生活如此可爱又天真
Indian culture has an uncanny knack to win over people by frustrating and nauseating them with its goody-goody sense of apparent naivety.
In a single working day in India, I would have interacted with ultra-rich and ultra-poor; with hard-nosed pragmatism and sublime spiritual wisdom; felt a deep sense of peace and a deep sense of depression.
We keep encountering basic existential questions all the time. And life just keeps hitting you from all sides, overwhelming our senses and faculty of thought.
When we relocate to a developed country, suddenly everything is so quiet.. And there is this big emptiness.. Life feels so.. cute and naive?
很难解释为什么会这样。以下是我所理解的。发达国家靠头脑生活，而印度靠心灵生活。在外界，社会和谐被视为经济财富的关键，而在印度流行的思想中，经济财富被视为社会和谐的关键。在外面的世界里，哲学家们坐在大学和政府的象牙塔里；而在印度，每个人都是哲学家。考虑到一个实际问题，印度想了解其背后的哲学，而世界其他国家只想解决这个愚蠢的问题，与生活和解。
印度文化有一种不可思议的技巧，通过表面上的天真，让人感到沮丧和恶心，从而赢得人们的支持。
在印度的一个工作日里，我就会与超级富豪和超级穷人互动——务实的态度，崇高的精神智慧；感到一种深深的平静和深深的沮丧感。
我们总是遇到一些基本的生存问题。生活不断从四面八方打击你，压倒我们的感官和思维能力。
当我们搬到一个发达国家后，突然间一切都变得如此安静。有一种巨大的空虚…感觉生活如此可爱又天真
Anonymous
This is based on my personal experiences and my feelings alone.
I am currently living in Europe, I am fortunate enough to live in a town with a lot of fellow Indians, but this is the double edged sword, I can’t escape judgement no matter what, I can’t step out of my comfort zone for this fear of being judged. As a student here, I get daily reminders my goal is to finish my education. The near constant worry of all the expectations,the worry you are wasting your parents hard earned money, the under-performance and the loneliness will get to some people(like me). You can’t be yourself because your social circle has only people you’ve known for years and it makes you feel boxed in. I read a line, “Leaving India is easy, it is the staying outside that is hard.’ I think it is particularly applicable because of our log kya kahenge mindset which demands that you get a job abroad and all that, this will also get to you, and you end up sitting in your room for days on end with very little human interaction over-thinking and becoming bitter. But you will also keep fighting this desolation because you know how much this whole thing is costing you, and you also don’t want your neighbors to say “Why did she come back?” This split in your mind will cause a lot of unrest. It will strengthen you in the long run and you will hate the experience while it is happening, but hopefully when it is done,you will acknowledge it is the best thing to happen to you.
这是基于我的个人经历和我自己的感受。
我目前生活在欧洲，我很幸运能和很多印度人住在一起，但这是一把双刃剑，无论如何，我都无法逃避评判，因为害怕被评判，我无法走出自己的舒适区。作为这里的一名学生，我每天都会收到提醒，我的目标是完成学业。对所有期望近乎无休止的担忧，担心你在浪费父母的血汗钱，表现不佳和孤独会让一些人（比如我）感到不安。你不能做你自己，因为你的社交圈里只有你认识多年的人，这让你觉得自己被束缚了，我读到一句话，“离开印度很容易，留在外面很难。”“我认为这句话特别适用，因为我们的思维模式要求你在国外找一份工作，这也会影响到你，你最终会连续几天坐在房间里，很少与人交流，过度思考，变得痛苦。但你也会继续与这种孤寂作斗争，因为你知道这整件事花了你多少钱，而且你也不想让你的邻居说“她为什么回来？”你的这种想法会引起很多不安。从长远来看，它会让你变得更强大，当它发生的时候，你会讨厌它，但希望当它完成时，你会承认它是发生在你身上的最好的事情。
This is based on my personal experiences and my feelings alone.
I am currently living in Europe, I am fortunate enough to live in a town with a lot of fellow Indians, but this is the double edged sword, I can’t escape judgement no matter what, I can’t step out of my comfort zone for this fear of being judged. As a student here, I get daily reminders my goal is to finish my education. The near constant worry of all the expectations,the worry you are wasting your parents hard earned money, the under-performance and the loneliness will get to some people(like me). You can’t be yourself because your social circle has only people you’ve known for years and it makes you feel boxed in. I read a line, “Leaving India is easy, it is the staying outside that is hard.’ I think it is particularly applicable because of our log kya kahenge mindset which demands that you get a job abroad and all that, this will also get to you, and you end up sitting in your room for days on end with very little human interaction over-thinking and becoming bitter. But you will also keep fighting this desolation because you know how much this whole thing is costing you, and you also don’t want your neighbors to say “Why did she come back?” This split in your mind will cause a lot of unrest. It will strengthen you in the long run and you will hate the experience while it is happening, but hopefully when it is done,you will acknowledge it is the best thing to happen to you.
这是基于我的个人经历和我自己的感受。
我目前生活在欧洲，我很幸运能和很多印度人住在一起，但这是一把双刃剑，无论如何，我都无法逃避评判，因为害怕被评判，我无法走出自己的舒适区。作为这里的一名学生，我每天都会收到提醒，我的目标是完成学业。对所有期望近乎无休止的担忧，担心你在浪费父母的血汗钱，表现不佳和孤独会让一些人（比如我）感到不安。你不能做你自己，因为你的社交圈里只有你认识多年的人，这让你觉得自己被束缚了，我读到一句话，“离开印度很容易，留在外面很难。”“我认为这句话特别适用，因为我们的思维模式要求你在国外找一份工作，这也会影响到你，你最终会连续几天坐在房间里，很少与人交流，过度思考，变得痛苦。但你也会继续与这种孤寂作斗争，因为你知道这整件事花了你多少钱，而且你也不想让你的邻居说“她为什么回来？”你的这种想法会引起很多不安。从长远来看，它会让你变得更强大，当它发生的时候，你会讨厌它，但希望当它完成时，你会承认它是发生在你身上的最好的事情。
Aniket Deshmukh
Hi don’t be upset, what you are going through is very common, what you need to do is to go outside and start making friends
嗨，不要难过，你所经历的是很常见的，你需要做的是走出去，开始交朋友
Hi don’t be upset, what you are going through is very common, what you need to do is to go outside and start making friends
嗨，不要难过，你所经历的是很常见的，你需要做的是走出去，开始交朋友
Anonymous
Hey. Thankyou so much for your ideas. Gives me a lot of positive energy
嘿。非常感谢你的建议，给了我很多正能量
Hey. Thankyou so much for your ideas. Gives me a lot of positive energy
嘿。非常感谢你的建议，给了我很多正能量
ShailendR. Singh
It happens with everyone … I spent 10 months in Canada like this around 10 years back … now I want to go again.. definitely starting 1–2 yrs are difficult… u need company… India is amazing country.. we don't like so many things here .. but we miss it always when we r far from motherland..!! Stay strong first … involve urself with people!!
每个人都会这样，大约10年前我在加拿大就这样待了10个月，现在我想再去一次……开始1-2年肯定很困难，你需要陪伴，印度是个了不起的国家。我们不喜欢这里的很多东西，但是当我们远离祖国时，我们总是想念它!首先要保持坚强，与人交往!
It happens with everyone … I spent 10 months in Canada like this around 10 years back … now I want to go again.. definitely starting 1–2 yrs are difficult… u need company… India is amazing country.. we don't like so many things here .. but we miss it always when we r far from motherland..!! Stay strong first … involve urself with people!!
每个人都会这样，大约10年前我在加拿大就这样待了10个月，现在我想再去一次……开始1-2年肯定很困难，你需要陪伴，印度是个了不起的国家。我们不喜欢这里的很多东西，但是当我们远离祖国时，我们总是想念它!首先要保持坚强，与人交往!
Padma Rangarajan
Unfamiliarity breeds uncertainty.
India is a very different country to live in, compared to the USA. Every Indian who travels to the US expects this. But expecting something and actually living it are two entirely different scenarios.
I was newly married when I came to the US with my husband. And when I say America, I DO NOT mean NYC. I mean, a small city in Virginia. Transported from the busy hustle-bustle of Mumbai to a small town in Virginia.
不熟悉会滋生紧张不安的情绪。
与美国相比，印度是一个非常不同的国家。每个前往美国的印度人都期待着这一点。但是期待和实际生活是完全不同的两种情况。
当我和我丈夫来到美国时，我刚结婚。当我说美国时，我不是指纽约。我是说，弗吉尼亚的一个小城市。从熙熙攘攘的孟买搬到弗吉尼亚的一个小镇。
Unfamiliarity breeds uncertainty.
India is a very different country to live in, compared to the USA. Every Indian who travels to the US expects this. But expecting something and actually living it are two entirely different scenarios.
I was newly married when I came to the US with my husband. And when I say America, I DO NOT mean NYC. I mean, a small city in Virginia. Transported from the busy hustle-bustle of Mumbai to a small town in Virginia.
不熟悉会滋生紧张不安的情绪。
与美国相比，印度是一个非常不同的国家。每个前往美国的印度人都期待着这一点。但是期待和实际生活是完全不同的两种情况。
当我和我丈夫来到美国时，我刚结婚。当我说美国时，我不是指纽约。我是说，弗吉尼亚的一个小城市。从熙熙攘攘的孟买搬到弗吉尼亚的一个小镇。
What hit me first was the silence. It was 8pm and most of the stores were closed! There were no pavements, no one walking about. This is was big fact to get used to. It can easily make you depressed. In America, people living in small towns do not walk. They drive.
Which brings me to the next point. Driving. There is no public transport. You have to drive. For the first couple of months, I was in a weird state of confusion. I was a new bride with a loving husband, yet I was so depressed. I didn’t have any friends in this place, no one to simply drop in and chat and biggest drawback, I couldn’t go out if my husband wasn’t there. I was a confident, independent girl who always went everywhere by herself, in a crowded city like Mumbai. Suddenly, I am living in a place where I can’t even step out to get some salt for my food because I didn’t drive. Believe me, if that doesn’t depress you, nothing would.
首先袭击我的是寂静。当时是晚上8点，大多数商店都关门了！人行道上没有人四处走动，这是一个需要习惯的事实。它很容易让你沮丧，在美国，生活在小城镇的人们不走路，他们开车。
这就引出了下一点：开车。没有公共交通工具。你必须开车，在最初的几个月里，我一直处于一种奇怪的困惑状态。我是一个新婚的新娘，有一个爱我的丈夫，但我却如此沮丧。我在这个地方没有朋友，没有人可以简单地来聊天，最大的缺点是，如果我丈夫不在，我就不能出去。我是一个自信、独立的女孩，在孟买这样拥挤的城市里，她总是一个人去任何地方。突然间，我生活在这样一个地方，我甚至不能出去买盐，因为我没有开车。相信我，如果这都不让你沮丧，那就没什么能让你沮丧了。
Which brings me to the next point. Driving. There is no public transport. You have to drive. For the first couple of months, I was in a weird state of confusion. I was a new bride with a loving husband, yet I was so depressed. I didn’t have any friends in this place, no one to simply drop in and chat and biggest drawback, I couldn’t go out if my husband wasn’t there. I was a confident, independent girl who always went everywhere by herself, in a crowded city like Mumbai. Suddenly, I am living in a place where I can’t even step out to get some salt for my food because I didn’t drive. Believe me, if that doesn’t depress you, nothing would.
首先袭击我的是寂静。当时是晚上8点，大多数商店都关门了！人行道上没有人四处走动，这是一个需要习惯的事实。它很容易让你沮丧，在美国，生活在小城镇的人们不走路，他们开车。
这就引出了下一点：开车。没有公共交通工具。你必须开车，在最初的几个月里，我一直处于一种奇怪的困惑状态。我是一个新婚的新娘，有一个爱我的丈夫，但我却如此沮丧。我在这个地方没有朋友，没有人可以简单地来聊天，最大的缺点是，如果我丈夫不在，我就不能出去。我是一个自信、独立的女孩，在孟买这样拥挤的城市里，她总是一个人去任何地方。突然间，我生活在这样一个地方，我甚至不能出去买盐，因为我没有开车。相信我，如果这都不让你沮丧，那就没什么能让你沮丧了。
Southern Virginia is not a hub of desis. So I didn’t come across other Indians. My husband had a few Indian friends but they weren’t married yet. There was no wives club. A couple of wives had kids, so they were too busy with their life.
I am not even talking about missing your family and friends. Obviously, that’s kind of part of the package. I am talking about all the other things, like paying for stuff using credit cards and not carrying much cash. If you do pay with cash, learning to count the change, like understanding that one dime is ten cents. I am talking about filling gas in the car, doing household chores without domestic help, checking the temperature every time you step out of the house, the southern drawled American English, the extensive use of ice in every drink, the gigantic cups of black coffee. Every single little thing takes some getting used to.
弗吉尼亚州南部不是印度人集中的地方。所以我没有遇到其他印度人。我丈夫有几个印度朋友，但他们还没有结婚，所以没有妻子俱乐部。有几个妻子都有孩子，所以他们的生活非常忙。
我甚至没有说想念家人和朋友。很明显，这是我们的一部分。我说的是所有其他的事情，比如用信用卡付款，不要带太多现金。如果你用现金支付，要学会数零钱，就像明白一毛钱等于十美分一样。我说的是给汽车加油，在没有家人帮助的情况下做家务，每次出门都要检查体温，南方口音（慢吞吞）的美式英语，每种饮料中都要大量使用冰块，大杯的黑咖啡，每一件小事都需要一些时间去适应。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I am not even talking about missing your family and friends. Obviously, that’s kind of part of the package. I am talking about all the other things, like paying for stuff using credit cards and not carrying much cash. If you do pay with cash, learning to count the change, like understanding that one dime is ten cents. I am talking about filling gas in the car, doing household chores without domestic help, checking the temperature every time you step out of the house, the southern drawled American English, the extensive use of ice in every drink, the gigantic cups of black coffee. Every single little thing takes some getting used to.
弗吉尼亚州南部不是印度人集中的地方。所以我没有遇到其他印度人。我丈夫有几个印度朋友，但他们还没有结婚，所以没有妻子俱乐部。有几个妻子都有孩子，所以他们的生活非常忙。
我甚至没有说想念家人和朋友。很明显，这是我们的一部分。我说的是所有其他的事情，比如用信用卡付款，不要带太多现金。如果你用现金支付，要学会数零钱，就像明白一毛钱等于十美分一样。我说的是给汽车加油，在没有家人帮助的情况下做家务，每次出门都要检查体温，南方口音（慢吞吞）的美式英语，每种饮料中都要大量使用冰块，大杯的黑咖啡，每一件小事都需要一些时间去适应。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I got used to every single little thing. Within a couple months, I got my driver’s license. That was my big step out of this state of depression and becoming part of this new society. I drove myself wherever I needed to go. I paid attention to people, their mannerisms and more importantly, the southern accent. I applied to graduate school and that really helped me get more integrated in this society. I made lots of new friends, mostly Americans, who by the way, are very welcoming and friendly. I learnt subtle nuances like saying “hey, I would probably do it this way” rather than “this isn’t the way you should do it”. I learnt how different liberal and conservative Americans are. I learnt about democratic and republican parties. I learnt to love salads with dressing. I have a big group of Indian wives club too now, since my husband’s friends got married within a year or two!
我习惯了每一件小事。几个月后，我拿到了驾照。这是我走出抑郁状态，成为这个新社会一部分的一大步。我自己开车去想去的地方。我注意人们的言谈举止，更重要的是，注意他们的南方口音。我申请了研究生院，这真的帮助我更加融入了这个社会。我交了很多新朋友，大多数是美国人，顺便说一下，他们非常热情和友好。我学会了细微的差别，比如说“嘿，我可能会这样做”，而不是“这不是你应该做的方式”。我了解到美国的自由派和保守派是多么不同。我了解了民主党派和共和党派。我学会了喜欢调味沙拉。我现在也遇到了一大群印度妻子俱乐部，因为我丈夫的朋友不到一两年就结婚了！
我习惯了每一件小事。几个月后，我拿到了驾照。这是我走出抑郁状态，成为这个新社会一部分的一大步。我自己开车去想去的地方。我注意人们的言谈举止，更重要的是，注意他们的南方口音。我申请了研究生院，这真的帮助我更加融入了这个社会。我交了很多新朋友，大多数是美国人，顺便说一下，他们非常热情和友好。我学会了细微的差别，比如说“嘿，我可能会这样做”，而不是“这不是你应该做的方式”。我了解到美国的自由派和保守派是多么不同。我了解了民主党派和共和党派。我学会了喜欢调味沙拉。我现在也遇到了一大群印度妻子俱乐部，因为我丈夫的朋友不到一两年就结婚了！
Life in America takes some getting used to. You can easily get depressed if you don’t try. I made a conscious effort to try. I had to. I complained a lot initially (my poor husband!!) about what a weird place this was. I complained about the mall not open full day on Sundays. I complained about not able to get desi food and other items on a whim. I ranted about how awesome Mumbai was and I can’t believe I can’t eat samosas whenever I want!
But now I understand how great it was that I came to this little city. I actually got to be around Americans and learn their ways. It is cool and I understand both cultures of living now, as different as day and night as they are!
在美国的生活需要一些时间来适应。如果你不去尝试，你很容易变得沮丧。我有意识地努力去尝试，我不得不这么干，我最初诸多抱怨，说这是一个多么奇怪的地方——我丈夫真可怜!我抱怨商场星期天不是全天营业。我抱怨一时兴起买不到印度食品和其他物品。我咆哮着说孟买有多棒，真不敢相信我不能随心所欲地吃萨莫萨！
但现在我明白了我来到的这个小城市是多么的美好。我实际上是和美国人在一起，学习他们的生活方式。这很酷，我现在理解了两种生活文化，它们就像白天和黑夜一样不同!
But now I understand how great it was that I came to this little city. I actually got to be around Americans and learn their ways. It is cool and I understand both cultures of living now, as different as day and night as they are!
在美国的生活需要一些时间来适应。如果你不去尝试，你很容易变得沮丧。我有意识地努力去尝试，我不得不这么干，我最初诸多抱怨，说这是一个多么奇怪的地方——我丈夫真可怜!我抱怨商场星期天不是全天营业。我抱怨一时兴起买不到印度食品和其他物品。我咆哮着说孟买有多棒，真不敢相信我不能随心所欲地吃萨莫萨！
但现在我明白了我来到的这个小城市是多么的美好。我实际上是和美国人在一起，学习他们的生活方式。这很酷，我现在理解了两种生活文化，它们就像白天和黑夜一样不同!
Anonymous
Reasons why I feel depressed in US sometimes:
A lot of things I learned while growing up seems to be useless now.
I feel like an outsider.
I came here to study, not to make money. But now I am forced to stay here in order to work and earn back the money I spend. My family and my girlfriend expect me to do so and I can totally understand it.
I have lost a lot of friends I had in India. It has become hard to be in touch with my old friends. I visit India once in a year. Each time I go there, I feel that the number of reasons to go back is gradually decreasing. Sometimes I feel I am neither here nor there.
Making friends in US is a difficult task especially if you are in your mid-late 20s. Everyone will be in a race. Nobody will really have time for anyone.
Here the competition is fierce and human relationships are not considered very important. I feel people are overly individualistic and I miss the sense of togetherness I experienced in India.
I miss my family especially my parents. I feel guilty for not being with them, helping them, during their old age.
我在美国有时感到沮丧的原因:
我在成长过程中学到的很多东西现在似乎都没用了。
我觉得自己像个局外人。
我来这里是为了学习，而不是为了赚钱。但现在我被迫留在这里工作，赚回我花出去的钱。我的家人和我的女朋友都希望我这么做，对此我完全可以理解。
我失去了很多在印度的朋友。要与我的老朋友保持联系，已经变得很困难。我一年回一次印度。每次去那里，都觉得回去的理由越来越少。有时我觉得我既不属于这里也不属于那里。
在美国交朋友是一项艰巨的任务，尤其是当你25岁的时候。所有人都在奔波，真的没有什么时间是给到别人的。
在这里，竞争很激烈，人际关系不被认为是很重要的。我觉得人们过于个人主义，我怀念我在印度体验到的团结感。
我想念我的家人，尤其是想念我的父母。我为在他们年老的时候没有和他们在一起，没有帮助他们而感到内疚。
Reasons why I feel depressed in US sometimes:
A lot of things I learned while growing up seems to be useless now.
I feel like an outsider.
I came here to study, not to make money. But now I am forced to stay here in order to work and earn back the money I spend. My family and my girlfriend expect me to do so and I can totally understand it.
I have lost a lot of friends I had in India. It has become hard to be in touch with my old friends. I visit India once in a year. Each time I go there, I feel that the number of reasons to go back is gradually decreasing. Sometimes I feel I am neither here nor there.
Making friends in US is a difficult task especially if you are in your mid-late 20s. Everyone will be in a race. Nobody will really have time for anyone.
Here the competition is fierce and human relationships are not considered very important. I feel people are overly individualistic and I miss the sense of togetherness I experienced in India.
I miss my family especially my parents. I feel guilty for not being with them, helping them, during their old age.
我在美国有时感到沮丧的原因:
我在成长过程中学到的很多东西现在似乎都没用了。
我觉得自己像个局外人。
我来这里是为了学习，而不是为了赚钱。但现在我被迫留在这里工作，赚回我花出去的钱。我的家人和我的女朋友都希望我这么做，对此我完全可以理解。
我失去了很多在印度的朋友。要与我的老朋友保持联系，已经变得很困难。我一年回一次印度。每次去那里，都觉得回去的理由越来越少。有时我觉得我既不属于这里也不属于那里。
在美国交朋友是一项艰巨的任务，尤其是当你25岁的时候。所有人都在奔波，真的没有什么时间是给到别人的。
在这里，竞争很激烈，人际关系不被认为是很重要的。我觉得人们过于个人主义，我怀念我在印度体验到的团结感。
我想念我的家人，尤其是想念我的父母。我为在他们年老的时候没有和他们在一起，没有帮助他们而感到内疚。
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