你是什么时候意识到你的“朋友”实际上是假朋友的？
正文翻译
When did you realize your “friends” were actually fake friends?
你是什么时候意识到你的“朋友”实际上是假朋友的？
When did you realize your “friends” were actually fake friends?
你是什么时候意识到你的“朋友”实际上是假朋友的？
评论翻译
gelatinous_poot
When I slowly realized I was only around for chores and errands. Rides to the airport, pick up furniture, help move. Anything social always resulted in either last minute cancellations, showing up 45 minutes late and bolting after 10 minutes. I thought they were busy, but no.
当我慢慢发现只有在需要干家务活时才叫我的时候。搭车去机场，运送大件家具，帮忙搬家。任何与社交有关的活动要不然是最后一分钟取消，要不然是迟到45分钟，要不然是10分钟之后就跑。我以为他们很忙，但其实不是。
When I slowly realized I was only around for chores and errands. Rides to the airport, pick up furniture, help move. Anything social always resulted in either last minute cancellations, showing up 45 minutes late and bolting after 10 minutes. I thought they were busy, but no.
当我慢慢发现只有在需要干家务活时才叫我的时候。搭车去机场，运送大件家具，帮忙搬家。任何与社交有关的活动要不然是最后一分钟取消，要不然是迟到45分钟，要不然是10分钟之后就跑。我以为他们很忙，但其实不是。
zenchemin
Went to pick up my xbox 360 a friend was borrowing, and our whole group of friends were there. They had spent the entire day playing games with snacks and pizza, and I had not been invited. And now I was in the situation of being the douche who takes the ball home and ruins the fun for everyone. I took my xbox and never spoke to anyone in that group again.
我去取朋友借走的Xbox 360，结果发现我的整个朋友圈子都在那里。他们吃着披萨唱着歌在那里打了一天的游戏，没有邀请我。现在我又变成了那个把球带回家去不让大家尽兴的混蛋了。我把Xbox带回家去之后就再也没跟他们说过话。
Went to pick up my xbox 360 a friend was borrowing, and our whole group of friends were there. They had spent the entire day playing games with snacks and pizza, and I had not been invited. And now I was in the situation of being the douche who takes the ball home and ruins the fun for everyone. I took my xbox and never spoke to anyone in that group again.
我去取朋友借走的Xbox 360，结果发现我的整个朋友圈子都在那里。他们吃着披萨唱着歌在那里打了一天的游戏，没有邀请我。现在我又变成了那个把球带回家去不让大家尽兴的混蛋了。我把Xbox带回家去之后就再也没跟他们说过话。
Death_By_Pun
They stopped inviting me to hang out. They would ask me to drive them to parties, but not invite me to go to the parties. They basically ghosted me for a while.
他们不再邀请我出去玩了。他们会让我开车带他们去派对，但从没邀请过我去那些派对。有一段时间他们基本上是把我当成了空气。
They stopped inviting me to hang out. They would ask me to drive them to parties, but not invite me to go to the parties. They basically ghosted me for a while.
他们不再邀请我出去玩了。他们会让我开车带他们去派对，但从没邀请过我去那些派对。有一段时间他们基本上是把我当成了空气。
They were once such amazing and important friends, but they gradually became really arrogant. It took a way longer than it should have to give up and find other people.
之前他们是特别棒、特别重要的朋友，但他们逐渐变得非常自大。我花了很长时间才意识到我应该放弃，寻找别的人。
之前他们是特别棒、特别重要的朋友，但他们逐渐变得非常自大。我花了很长时间才意识到我应该放弃，寻找别的人。
kittycowww
Dude. The group of friends I gave up on would do this to this guy we know. They'd invite him to hang out only so he could drive us. One time they didn't let him into the club so I decided to stay behind with him and watch movies at his house. He even had the decency to go back for my friends when the club closed. I'm no longer friends with them but I am still friends with the guy and he even helped me get together with my boyfriend. I don't give him enough props lol.
太对了哥们。之前被我放弃了的那群朋友就会对我认识的这个人做这种事情。他们邀请他出来玩，只是为了让他开车载我们一程。有一次他们没让他进俱乐部和他们一起玩，所以我决定不进去，而是留下来陪他一个人，去他家里看电影。他甚至讲究到会在俱乐部关门的时候再过去看看我的朋友们。我现在已经不再和其他人是朋友了，但我仍然和这个人是朋友，并且他还帮我和我现在的男朋友在一起。我没有给他足够的支持哈哈哈
Dude. The group of friends I gave up on would do this to this guy we know. They'd invite him to hang out only so he could drive us. One time they didn't let him into the club so I decided to stay behind with him and watch movies at his house. He even had the decency to go back for my friends when the club closed. I'm no longer friends with them but I am still friends with the guy and he even helped me get together with my boyfriend. I don't give him enough props lol.
太对了哥们。之前被我放弃了的那群朋友就会对我认识的这个人做这种事情。他们邀请他出来玩，只是为了让他开车载我们一程。有一次他们没让他进俱乐部和他们一起玩，所以我决定不进去，而是留下来陪他一个人，去他家里看电影。他甚至讲究到会在俱乐部关门的时候再过去看看我的朋友们。我现在已经不再和其他人是朋友了，但我仍然和这个人是朋友，并且他还帮我和我现在的男朋友在一起。我没有给他足够的支持哈哈哈
SpectreAmazing
Back in my first year of college, I used to have a group of friends (like 7 dudes with me included). We always hang out together and we're used to have this "group chat" where we discuss about anything from class subjects to random things. After a year, I noticed that one of the guys (let's just call him Randy) keeps getting excluded; Not invited/informed to group hangout while they're talking smack behind his back. And the "unofficial leader" of the group actually made a whole new group chat, inviting everyone (myself included) except Randy without his knowledge.
在我上大学的第一年，我有一群朋友（算上我七个人）。我们经常一起出去玩，并且我们也有个“群聊”，会在里面聊从课程到随便什么东西。一年之后，我发现有一个人（就叫他兰迪吧）总是被排出去；一起出去玩的时候不邀请他，还在背后说他的坏话。并且这个团体的“非官方领袖”真的建了一个新的群聊，把除了兰迪之外的所有人（包括我）都邀请了进去，他本人并不知情。
Back in my first year of college, I used to have a group of friends (like 7 dudes with me included). We always hang out together and we're used to have this "group chat" where we discuss about anything from class subjects to random things. After a year, I noticed that one of the guys (let's just call him Randy) keeps getting excluded; Not invited/informed to group hangout while they're talking smack behind his back. And the "unofficial leader" of the group actually made a whole new group chat, inviting everyone (myself included) except Randy without his knowledge.
在我上大学的第一年，我有一群朋友（算上我七个人）。我们经常一起出去玩，并且我们也有个“群聊”，会在里面聊从课程到随便什么东西。一年之后，我发现有一个人（就叫他兰迪吧）总是被排出去；一起出去玩的时候不邀请他，还在背后说他的坏话。并且这个团体的“非官方领袖”真的建了一个新的群聊，把除了兰迪之外的所有人（包括我）都邀请了进去，他本人并不知情。
I know what it feels to be left out, I experienced that in Middle school and it's really awful. I stopped hanging out with them and I starts hanging out with Randy. He's quite eccentric but a very good person at heart. We've been friends for more than 6 years, and he still got my back
我知道这是什么感受，我在中学时经历过这种事情，真的很糟糕。我此后就没有再和他们一起出去玩过，但是我开始和兰迪一起出去。他是个挺怪的人，但他的心地非常善良。我们已经当了六年多的朋友了，他仍然帮助着我。
我知道这是什么感受，我在中学时经历过这种事情，真的很糟糕。我此后就没有再和他们一起出去玩过，但是我开始和兰迪一起出去。他是个挺怪的人，但他的心地非常善良。我们已经当了六年多的朋友了，他仍然帮助着我。
indigo462
Good for you to be his friend! Most people would have been to cowardly to go against the group. I’m proud of you.
你能当他的朋友很棒！绝大多数人可能都不敢和自己的群体反着来。我为你感到自豪。
Good for you to be his friend! Most people would have been to cowardly to go against the group. I’m proud of you.
你能当他的朋友很棒！绝大多数人可能都不敢和自己的群体反着来。我为你感到自豪。
So many people see others being excluded/bullied and do nothing mostly out of fear of being excluded themselves.
有太多人看着其他人被排除出小团体或是被霸凌，但他们自己什么都不敢做，因为恐惧或是因为害怕他们自己也被排斥。
有太多人看着其他人被排除出小团体或是被霸凌，但他们自己什么都不敢做，因为恐惧或是因为害怕他们自己也被排斥。
Ashii_nix
Whenever we were supposed to hang out something came up and that something was hanging out with other mutual "friends"
只要我们打算出去玩，就一定会发生什么事情让他去不了，而这个事情其实是和其他共同的“朋友”出去玩。
Whenever we were supposed to hang out something came up and that something was hanging out with other mutual "friends"
只要我们打算出去玩，就一定会发生什么事情让他去不了，而这个事情其实是和其他共同的“朋友”出去玩。
gonewildecat
Yes! My “best friend” in high school used to do this to me all the time. On Wednesday, I’d ask if she wanted to see a movie Friday night. She’d always say maybe, if I can get out of doing whatever with my parents. Come Monday I’d hear her talking about how great the movie was. Apparently, last minute her parents said she didn’t have to go and miraculously a group of people called right then and asked her to see the same movie. She’d always say “I figured you made other plans” when I confronted her about it. In reality, she’d just wait to see what the better option was and pick on Friday. God that pissed me off.
没错！我高中时“最好的朋友”以前一直会对我做这种事。在周三，我会问她周五晚上要不要一起去看电影。她总是说也许吧，假如我能不去和家长一起做什么什么事的话。等到周一，我会听见她跟别人聊那个电影有多好看。显然到了最后时刻她的家长突然跟她说她不用去了，然后奇迹般地出现了一群人立刻给她打电话让她去看同一部电影。我跟她对峙的时候，她总是跟我说“我以为你有其他打算”。事实上，她只是在等有没有更好的选项，然后到周五那天挑一个。天哪这真的让我非常愤怒。
Yes! My “best friend” in high school used to do this to me all the time. On Wednesday, I’d ask if she wanted to see a movie Friday night. She’d always say maybe, if I can get out of doing whatever with my parents. Come Monday I’d hear her talking about how great the movie was. Apparently, last minute her parents said she didn’t have to go and miraculously a group of people called right then and asked her to see the same movie. She’d always say “I figured you made other plans” when I confronted her about it. In reality, she’d just wait to see what the better option was and pick on Friday. God that pissed me off.
没错！我高中时“最好的朋友”以前一直会对我做这种事。在周三，我会问她周五晚上要不要一起去看电影。她总是说也许吧，假如我能不去和家长一起做什么什么事的话。等到周一，我会听见她跟别人聊那个电影有多好看。显然到了最后时刻她的家长突然跟她说她不用去了，然后奇迹般地出现了一群人立刻给她打电话让她去看同一部电影。我跟她对峙的时候，她总是跟我说“我以为你有其他打算”。事实上，她只是在等有没有更好的选项，然后到周五那天挑一个。天哪这真的让我非常愤怒。
TheManFromFarAway
This is the worst. I remember being in high school and trying to make plans with people for the weekend and getting responses to the effect of, "I'll see what else is going on this weekend before I commit to this idea." Once or twice? Alright. But when it's every time you just sort of quit trying after a while
这太糟糕了。我记得在高中的时候我尝试和别人制定周末的计划，得到的回答总是类似于“我看看这周末还有什么要做的，然后我再决定要不要去你这个。”一两次倒是没问题。不过如果每次都是这个后果的话，那就没有询问的必要了。
This is the worst. I remember being in high school and trying to make plans with people for the weekend and getting responses to the effect of, "I'll see what else is going on this weekend before I commit to this idea." Once or twice? Alright. But when it's every time you just sort of quit trying after a while
这太糟糕了。我记得在高中的时候我尝试和别人制定周末的计划，得到的回答总是类似于“我看看这周末还有什么要做的，然后我再决定要不要去你这个。”一两次倒是没问题。不过如果每次都是这个后果的话，那就没有询问的必要了。
edenunbound
I asked my ex bff to take the day off for St. Patrick's day since we always celebrate together. She did. I reminded her a couple days before to finalize what we would do. Her response was "Oh I made plans with X. You could come meet us for a drink I guess."
我问我之前最好的朋友在圣帕特里克节请一天假一起玩，因为我们之前每年都这么做。她答应了。那天之前的几天，我提醒她决定一下我们要做什么。她的回答是“哦我和X有约了。我猜在那之后你可以过来跟我们喝一杯。”
I asked my ex bff to take the day off for St. Patrick's day since we always celebrate together. She did. I reminded her a couple days before to finalize what we would do. Her response was "Oh I made plans with X. You could come meet us for a drink I guess."
我问我之前最好的朋友在圣帕特里克节请一天假一起玩，因为我们之前每年都这么做。她答应了。那天之前的几天，我提醒她决定一下我们要做什么。她的回答是“哦我和X有约了。我猜在那之后你可以过来跟我们喝一杯。”
I said no thanks and in my head the friendship was over. She never reached out to me once. Turns out I wasn't important in her life.
我说不用了，然后在我的脑海中这段友谊就结束了。她从来都没主动接触过我。结果我在她的生命中并不重要。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
我说不用了，然后在我的脑海中这段友谊就结束了。她从来都没主动接触过我。结果我在她的生命中并不重要。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
LiquidGoldMonk
Man, this sounds like my “friends”. I work strange hours and a lot of weekends so I let the friends know that I’m around a particular Saturday weeks in advance to meet up for drinks/movie/ etc and they always flake at the last minute. Find out afterwards they have gone out with other friends. So now I don’t bother. And I don’t have a lot of friends to begin with. Man it’s lonely
天哪，这听起来就像我的“朋友们”。我工作的时间比较奇怪，有很多周末我也得工作，所以我经常提前让我的朋友们知道有哪个周六我是有空的，我们可以一起去喝酒，看电影等等，但他们总是在最后一分钟拒绝。结果他们是和其他朋友出去了。所以现在我也懒得管了。并且我本来也没有多少朋友。天哪太孤独了。
Man, this sounds like my “friends”. I work strange hours and a lot of weekends so I let the friends know that I’m around a particular Saturday weeks in advance to meet up for drinks/movie/ etc and they always flake at the last minute. Find out afterwards they have gone out with other friends. So now I don’t bother. And I don’t have a lot of friends to begin with. Man it’s lonely
天哪，这听起来就像我的“朋友们”。我工作的时间比较奇怪，有很多周末我也得工作，所以我经常提前让我的朋友们知道有哪个周六我是有空的，我们可以一起去喝酒，看电影等等，但他们总是在最后一分钟拒绝。结果他们是和其他朋友出去了。所以现在我也懒得管了。并且我本来也没有多少朋友。天哪太孤独了。
Idgiethreadgoode86
When I was babysitting her kids things were going great. We would hangout all the time...have movie nights and just talk and chill. But the second she no longer needed a babysitter was the second I got kicked to the curb. No explanation...not even a text back. Some people will act like your best friend until they no longer need you. Their loss though.
在我给她看孩子的时候，一切都还算不错。我们会经常出去玩……晚上看电影，聊聊天放松一下。但在她不再需要人看孩子的时候，我就立刻被打入冷宫了。没有任何解释……甚至连短信也没再给我发过。有些人会一直演得像你最好的朋友，直到他们不再需要你的那一刻。虽然这是他们的损失。
When I was babysitting her kids things were going great. We would hangout all the time...have movie nights and just talk and chill. But the second she no longer needed a babysitter was the second I got kicked to the curb. No explanation...not even a text back. Some people will act like your best friend until they no longer need you. Their loss though.
在我给她看孩子的时候，一切都还算不错。我们会经常出去玩……晚上看电影，聊聊天放松一下。但在她不再需要人看孩子的时候，我就立刻被打入冷宫了。没有任何解释……甚至连短信也没再给我发过。有些人会一直演得像你最好的朋友，直到他们不再需要你的那一刻。虽然这是他们的损失。
fancy_marmot
Yep, this happened to me, but more generally. Had a "friend" who would only contact me when she needed something, but she was pretty sly about it in the beginning (inviting me over to hang and then bringing up the favor organically, like oh we don't have anyone to watch the dog next weekend, or I want to move this bed but it's so heavy, etc). After a while it got more egregious and obvious - only calling to ask to use my truck or dog sit. I'd politely say I wasn't available and eventually she stopped calling. She still texts every now and then to "catch up" (she tried that a few times in the past and it was always followed by a request) despite my no longer responding. To this day I cringe when someone says "Hi Friend!", her freakin catchphrase.
没错，这种事情也发生在我的身上过，但也挺普遍的。曾经有过一个“朋友”，只有她需要什么东西的时候她才会联系我，但她一开始对此还是挺隐晦的（邀请我过去玩，然后一点也不唐突地提出要帮忙的事情，比如哦我们下周没有人帮忙看狗了，或者我想搬这个但是太重了，等等）。过了一阵子就越来越明显、越糟糕了——只有在用到我的卡车或者需要我看狗的时候才给我打电话。我礼貌地跟她说我没时间，最后她就不再打电话了。她仍然会偶尔给我发个短信跟我“联络一下”（之前她试过几次，后面跟着的总是要求），尽管我再也不回她了。直到今天，有人说“嗨，朋友！”的时候我都会吓得一激灵，这是她的口头禅。
Yep, this happened to me, but more generally. Had a "friend" who would only contact me when she needed something, but she was pretty sly about it in the beginning (inviting me over to hang and then bringing up the favor organically, like oh we don't have anyone to watch the dog next weekend, or I want to move this bed but it's so heavy, etc). After a while it got more egregious and obvious - only calling to ask to use my truck or dog sit. I'd politely say I wasn't available and eventually she stopped calling. She still texts every now and then to "catch up" (she tried that a few times in the past and it was always followed by a request) despite my no longer responding. To this day I cringe when someone says "Hi Friend!", her freakin catchphrase.
没错，这种事情也发生在我的身上过，但也挺普遍的。曾经有过一个“朋友”，只有她需要什么东西的时候她才会联系我，但她一开始对此还是挺隐晦的（邀请我过去玩，然后一点也不唐突地提出要帮忙的事情，比如哦我们下周没有人帮忙看狗了，或者我想搬这个但是太重了，等等）。过了一阵子就越来越明显、越糟糕了——只有在用到我的卡车或者需要我看狗的时候才给我打电话。我礼貌地跟她说我没时间，最后她就不再打电话了。她仍然会偶尔给我发个短信跟我“联络一下”（之前她试过几次，后面跟着的总是要求），尽管我再也不回她了。直到今天，有人说“嗨，朋友！”的时候我都会吓得一激灵，这是她的口头禅。
Meowmyissues
When I was in school, all my friends and I did different A levels.
在我上学的时候，我的朋友和我读的是不同的科目。
When I was in school, all my friends and I did different A levels.
在我上学的时候，我的朋友和我读的是不同的科目。
Despite us all having different lessons to each other, they would wait for each other to go to lunch together, but they would always always forget me. Like I'd come out and they wouldn't be there, so I'd have lunch by myself.
尽管我们每天都在上不同的课，他们都会等待彼此下课然后一起去吃午餐，但他们每次都会把我给忘了，就比如我下课的时候他们不在门口，所以我得自己吃午餐。
尽管我们每天都在上不同的课，他们都会等待彼此下课然后一起去吃午餐，但他们每次都会把我给忘了，就比如我下课的时候他们不在门口，所以我得自己吃午餐。
And then they'd come back and tell me they thought I was with them.
然后他们吃完午餐回来，跟我说他们以为我和他们在一起呢。
然后他们吃完午餐回来，跟我说他们以为我和他们在一起呢。
I was the only one they didn't wait for.
我是唯一一个他们没等过的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
我是唯一一个他们没等过的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I've only seen one of them since we left school. She had forgotten my name.
在我们毕业之后，我只见过他们中的一个人，她已经忘了我的名字了。
在我们毕业之后，我只见过他们中的一个人，她已经忘了我的名字了。
So that sucked.
所以这就很糟糕。
所以这就很糟糕。
MistahFrodo
That happened to me. One time my friends all sat at a lunch table that was full and I was sat on one that was completely empty and so I asked them to come sit by me and they said no. Those people suck.
我也遇见过这种事。有一次我的朋友们全坐在一个餐桌旁边，那个餐桌已经满了。于是我找了一个完全空荡的餐桌，叫他们过来和我一起吃，他们说不去。这帮人太烂了。
That happened to me. One time my friends all sat at a lunch table that was full and I was sat on one that was completely empty and so I asked them to come sit by me and they said no. Those people suck.
我也遇见过这种事。有一次我的朋友们全坐在一个餐桌旁边，那个餐桌已经满了。于是我找了一个完全空荡的餐桌，叫他们过来和我一起吃，他们说不去。这帮人太烂了。
maddallena
When my phone got stolen and I lost their phone numbers. Mine stayed the same, but we just never talked again.
我的手机被偷了，他们的手机号都没了。我的手机号从没变过，但我们再也没打过电话。
When my phone got stolen and I lost their phone numbers. Mine stayed the same, but we just never talked again.
我的手机被偷了，他们的手机号都没了。我的手机号从没变过，但我们再也没打过电话。
HereComesTheVroom
When my Apple account got compromised and I lost my backup when I changed phones I lost all of my numbers. I haven’t gotten a text or call from any of my friends since. That was 5 years ago.
在我的苹果账号被盗了，我换手机丢了备份之后，我的手机号码全没了。我在此之后再也没接到过任何一个朋友的短信或电话。那是五年前了。
When my Apple account got compromised and I lost my backup when I changed phones I lost all of my numbers. I haven’t gotten a text or call from any of my friends since. That was 5 years ago.
在我的苹果账号被盗了，我换手机丢了备份之后，我的手机号码全没了。我在此之后再也没接到过任何一个朋友的短信或电话。那是五年前了。
bunnyrut
My phone number hasn't changed in decades. No one seems to have it for some reason.
我的手机号码已经有几十年都没变过了。不知道为什么，没人有我的手机号。
My phone number hasn't changed in decades. No one seems to have it for some reason.
我的手机号码已经有几十年都没变过了。不知道为什么，没人有我的手机号。
mandox1
When I traded in my truck for a smaller more eco friendly vehicle. Communication plummeted now that i can’t haul furniture around, assist with moving as much, dispose of garbage.. etc.
我把我的卡车换成一个小一些的、更环保的车子之后。和朋友们的联系一下就少了，因为现在我没办法到处运家具、帮忙搬家、扔垃圾了。
When I traded in my truck for a smaller more eco friendly vehicle. Communication plummeted now that i can’t haul furniture around, assist with moving as much, dispose of garbage.. etc.
我把我的卡车换成一个小一些的、更环保的车子之后。和朋友们的联系一下就少了，因为现在我没办法到处运家具、帮忙搬家、扔垃圾了。
phuntss
When they stopped contacting me when I stopped drinking
当我戒酒之后他们就不再联系我的时候。
When they stopped contacting me when I stopped drinking
当我戒酒之后他们就不再联系我的时候。
suppinmajibusu
I feel this. Used to have countless friends. Went out all the time. Lost control of myself and quit. Friends stopped calling. Now I’m a weird eccentric who hangs out in the woods in all my free time. Things are better this way. I have a couple friends who stuck around and the girl of my dreams. That’s all I need.
我感同身受。曾经有很多朋友。经常一起出去玩。我对自己失去控制了，就退出去了。朋友们不再打电话了。现在我是个闲暇时刻就会钻进森林里的怪咖。我觉得这样更好。我有几个一直在我身边的朋友，也有我梦想中的女孩。这就是我需要的一切了。
I feel this. Used to have countless friends. Went out all the time. Lost control of myself and quit. Friends stopped calling. Now I’m a weird eccentric who hangs out in the woods in all my free time. Things are better this way. I have a couple friends who stuck around and the girl of my dreams. That’s all I need.
我感同身受。曾经有很多朋友。经常一起出去玩。我对自己失去控制了，就退出去了。朋友们不再打电话了。现在我是个闲暇时刻就会钻进森林里的怪咖。我觉得这样更好。我有几个一直在我身边的朋友，也有我梦想中的女孩。这就是我需要的一切了。
RaiThioS
When you stop going to the bar you no longer exist to those who live that life. It messed with my head for awhile but I get it now.
当你不再去酒吧的时候，对于那些过着那种人生的人来说，你就不再存在了。我曾经有好一阵子都搞不明白，但现在我懂了。
When you stop going to the bar you no longer exist to those who live that life. It messed with my head for awhile but I get it now.
当你不再去酒吧的时候，对于那些过着那种人生的人来说，你就不再存在了。我曾经有好一阵子都搞不明白，但现在我懂了。
allens969
When I went through a divorce and was down to $700...most difficult period and weeded out all those who “friended” me for my generosity because I was well settled. Started over and have like 2 true good friends.
当我刚刚离婚，口袋里只有700美元的时候……这是最困难的一段时间，并且那些因为我之前的慷慨和我“结交”的朋友们也全都离开了。从头开始之后，我有两个真正的好朋友。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
When I went through a divorce and was down to $700...most difficult period and weeded out all those who “friended” me for my generosity because I was well settled. Started over and have like 2 true good friends.
当我刚刚离婚，口袋里只有700美元的时候……这是最困难的一段时间，并且那些因为我之前的慷慨和我“结交”的朋友们也全都离开了。从头开始之后，我有两个真正的好朋友。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
littled311
I was invited to the bachelorette party for one of the friends in this group. While at the party, I figured out that I was the only person not invited to the wedding. I had been invited to the party because they needed another person to chip in for expenses.
圈子里有个朋友开（婚礼前的）单身派对，把我请了过去。参加派对的时候，我发现我是唯一一个没有收到婚礼请柬的人。他们把我请过去是因为他们想多来一个人平摊预算
I was invited to the bachelorette party for one of the friends in this group. While at the party, I figured out that I was the only person not invited to the wedding. I had been invited to the party because they needed another person to chip in for expenses.
圈子里有个朋友开（婚礼前的）单身派对，把我请了过去。参加派对的时候，我发现我是唯一一个没有收到婚礼请柬的人。他们把我请过去是因为他们想多来一个人平摊预算
flabbytabby12
What kind of human scum does that?
什么人渣会做出这种事情？
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
What kind of human scum does that?
什么人渣会做出这种事情？
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
littled311
It's amazing what people will do to get what they want because they "deserve" a perfect wedding experience.
人们为了达到自己想要的情况而做出的事情真的令人震惊，只是因为他们觉得自己“值得”一个完美的婚礼体验。
It's amazing what people will do to get what they want because they "deserve" a perfect wedding experience.
人们为了达到自己想要的情况而做出的事情真的令人震惊，只是因为他们觉得自己“值得”一个完美的婚礼体验。
UncomfortableChuckle
My ex did that shit; would boggle my mind every time.
我的前任就做过这种事情，我每次都想不通。
My ex did that shit; would boggle my mind every time.
我的前任就做过这种事情，我每次都想不通。
She'd plan an event for 12 people and then invite everyone she wanted there. If anyone wasn't available or would bail, she'd start inviting people she wouldn't want to hang out with. She'd rather invite people she didnt like than scaling back the event.
她会先计划一个12人的活动，然后邀请所有她希望到场的人。假如有人去不了或者得放鸽子，她就邀请别的她不愿意一起出去玩的人。她宁愿邀请自己不喜欢的人，也不愿意把活动规模缩小一点。
她会先计划一个12人的活动，然后邀请所有她希望到场的人。假如有人去不了或者得放鸽子，她就邀请别的她不愿意一起出去玩的人。她宁愿邀请自己不喜欢的人，也不愿意把活动规模缩小一点。
dorvann
Something similar happened to me--there was a minimum group rate for 16 and they needed a 16th person.
类似的事情也在我的身上发生过——那个活动最少需要16个人参加，他们需要第16个人。
Something similar happened to me--there was a minimum group rate for 16 and they needed a 16th person.
类似的事情也在我的身上发生过——那个活动最少需要16个人参加，他们需要第16个人。
And then the night before I was told the event was canceled --- what actually happened is one of their friends who previously could not make it suddenly could go so they invited him and dumped me.
然后在活动的前一天晚上他们跟我说活动取消了——事实上是他们有一个之前说来不了的朋友突然能来了，于是他们邀请那个朋友过去，然后把我给踢了。
然后在活动的前一天晚上他们跟我说活动取消了——事实上是他们有一个之前说来不了的朋友突然能来了，于是他们邀请那个朋友过去，然后把我给踢了。
Spookypumpkinbb
Apparently I didn’t realize I was on a different tier of friendship with my so called friend. My friend was getting married and I didn’t get an invite, which was fine since her wedding was a destination wedding in a different country.
显然我并没有意识到我和那个所谓的朋友之间的友谊的等级并不一样。我的那个朋友要结婚了，但我并没有收到请柬，但这倒还好，因为她的婚礼是在另一个国家办的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Apparently I didn’t realize I was on a different tier of friendship with my so called friend. My friend was getting married and I didn’t get an invite, which was fine since her wedding was a destination wedding in a different country.
显然我并没有意识到我和那个所谓的朋友之间的友谊的等级并不一样。我的那个朋友要结婚了，但我并没有收到请柬，但这倒还好，因为她的婚礼是在另一个国家办的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I attended a sleepover party, which she hosted. There was about 9 girls there in total. They kept talking about the kick ass bachelorette party and then started showing photos of the crazy party. I realized I was the only one not invited. Made me feel kind of crummy.
之后我参加了一个过夜的派对，她办的。当时总共有9个女孩。她们一直在那里聊单身派对，然后开始传阅那天的照片。我才发现我是唯一一个没有收到邀请的。让我觉得有点糟糕。
之后我参加了一个过夜的派对，她办的。当时总共有9个女孩。她们一直在那里聊单身派对，然后开始传阅那天的照片。我才发现我是唯一一个没有收到邀请的。让我觉得有点糟糕。
AggravatingCupcake0
I am a firm believer that you don't talk about a party in front of someone unless they have been invited (or unless you are willing to remedy the situation by extending an invite then and there). I would maintain that the same rules should apply here, even though the party in question already happened.
我非常坚定地相信除非你面前的这个人收到了派对的请柬，否则你就不在他的面前聊这件事（或者你愿意立刻邀请他加入这个派对）。我觉得这个规则在这里同样适用，即便这个派对已经发生了。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I am a firm believer that you don't talk about a party in front of someone unless they have been invited (or unless you are willing to remedy the situation by extending an invite then and there). I would maintain that the same rules should apply here, even though the party in question already happened.
我非常坚定地相信除非你面前的这个人收到了派对的请柬，否则你就不在他的面前聊这件事（或者你愿意立刻邀请他加入这个派对）。我觉得这个规则在这里同样适用，即便这个派对已经发生了。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Edit: Also wanted to add, if you're inviting them then and there, you need to make it sound like you *really mean it.* Be enthusiastic about it. Because the only thing more humiliating than not being invited to the party is when people pull the "Oh, um, yeah, you can come too... if you want," type of invite.
还有一点想说的，假如你想要当场邀请他的话，那么你得让自己给他一种你【真的希望他也能来】的感觉。热情一点。因为只有一件事比没有收到邀请更羞辱人，那就是你收到的邀请是“哦，呃，好，你也可以来……假如你想来的话”。
还有一点想说的，假如你想要当场邀请他的话，那么你得让自己给他一种你【真的希望他也能来】的感觉。热情一点。因为只有一件事比没有收到邀请更羞辱人，那就是你收到的邀请是“哦，呃，好，你也可以来……假如你想来的话”。
ts1985
One friend stopped replying to my texts right after we graduated from college. Like the same week we graduated. So... I was pretty much just a study buddy that they kept close to keep me helping them.
我有个朋友在我大学毕业之后就不再回我的消息了。就在我们毕业的那个礼拜。所以……我基本上就只是一个他们为了让我一直帮他们学习而搞好关系的学伴而已。
One friend stopped replying to my texts right after we graduated from college. Like the same week we graduated. So... I was pretty much just a study buddy that they kept close to keep me helping them.
我有个朋友在我大学毕业之后就不再回我的消息了。就在我们毕业的那个礼拜。所以……我基本上就只是一个他们为了让我一直帮他们学习而搞好关系的学伴而已。
Deezus1229
This is basically all of the friends I made at various points in college. As soon as we don't see each other 3x a week, they fade away. I get they're busy but I didn't realize making lasting friendships as an adult would be so difficult.
这基本上是我在大学交到过的所有朋友。只要我们没办法再每星期见三次面，他们就会消失。我以为他们很忙，但我没有意识到成年之后再交长远的朋友有这么难。
This is basically all of the friends I made at various points in college. As soon as we don't see each other 3x a week, they fade away. I get they're busy but I didn't realize making lasting friendships as an adult would be so difficult.
这基本上是我在大学交到过的所有朋友。只要我们没办法再每星期见三次面，他们就会消失。我以为他们很忙，但我没有意识到成年之后再交长远的朋友有这么难。
psyched622
It is SO hard to make friends as an adult. I moved to a new city about a year and a half ago and still have zero friends. This one girl was/is trying to be friends with me but only because she wants someone to emotionally dump on. Other than that, I've had a couple "friend dates" to meet people and they usually just stop texting back. I feel like most adults already have their friend group, and it is almost impossible to get into those.
成年之后再交朋友真的太难了。我一年半之前搬到了一座新的城市，现在我仍然没有朋友。有个女孩之前想和我交朋友，但她只是想找一个情绪的垃圾桶。除此之外，我还参加过几次“联谊会”和别人见面，但他们通常之后就没再回过消息。我感觉绝大多数成年人都已经有他们自己的朋友圈了，再想加入进去是非常困难的。
It is SO hard to make friends as an adult. I moved to a new city about a year and a half ago and still have zero friends. This one girl was/is trying to be friends with me but only because she wants someone to emotionally dump on. Other than that, I've had a couple "friend dates" to meet people and they usually just stop texting back. I feel like most adults already have their friend group, and it is almost impossible to get into those.
成年之后再交朋友真的太难了。我一年半之前搬到了一座新的城市，现在我仍然没有朋友。有个女孩之前想和我交朋友，但她只是想找一个情绪的垃圾桶。除此之外，我还参加过几次“联谊会”和别人见面，但他们通常之后就没再回过消息。我感觉绝大多数成年人都已经有他们自己的朋友圈了，再想加入进去是非常困难的。
irishkegprincess
Same thing happened to me. Was friends with so many people during college and the last 3 weeks was an unpaid work placement which we had to go back to the school to hand in our paperwork, not one of them spoke to me or would even answer me if I said something to them. Became clear that I was only valuable to them when I was helping them. Class awards had me down as "most willing to help classmates"
同样的事情我也经历过。在上大学的时候和很多人都是朋友，最后三周是无偿实习，我们得回到学校交材料，根本没有人和我说话，甚至我和他们说话他们也不会回答我。显然我只有在帮他们忙的时候才是对他们有价值的。班级给了我一个“最乐于助人奖”。
Same thing happened to me. Was friends with so many people during college and the last 3 weeks was an unpaid work placement which we had to go back to the school to hand in our paperwork, not one of them spoke to me or would even answer me if I said something to them. Became clear that I was only valuable to them when I was helping them. Class awards had me down as "most willing to help classmates"
同样的事情我也经历过。在上大学的时候和很多人都是朋友，最后三周是无偿实习，我们得回到学校交材料，根本没有人和我说话，甚至我和他们说话他们也不会回答我。显然我只有在帮他们忙的时候才是对他们有价值的。班级给了我一个“最乐于助人奖”。
Sumit316
"most willing to help classmates"
“最乐于助人奖”
"most willing to help classmates"
“最乐于助人奖”
This is literally a label which gets a lot of friends because it always attracts people. It can be a problem because you are always questioning every person you befriend. It is almost like you have to be extra careful because you are kind and helpful. Such is the world we are in now.
这真的是一个能交到很多朋友的标签，因为总是能吸引到别人。但这也能成为一种文体，因为你总是得质疑你交到的每一个朋友。简直就像是因为你热心善良，所以你得多加小心。这就是我们现在的世界。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
这真的是一个能交到很多朋友的标签，因为总是能吸引到别人。但这也能成为一种文体，因为你总是得质疑你交到的每一个朋友。简直就像是因为你热心善良，所以你得多加小心。这就是我们现在的世界。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
The only positive of this is that you can quickly identify fake friends because they drift away without giving a fuck while the real ones stay.
唯一积极的方面在于，你可以很快地识别出哪些朋友是假的，因为他们会无声无息地消失，而那些真正的朋友则会一直在你身边。
唯一积极的方面在于，你可以很快地识别出哪些朋友是假的，因为他们会无声无息地消失，而那些真正的朋友则会一直在你身边。
hardyflashier
I remember we got given one assignment in Uni, put into random groups. I was in a group with literally nobody I knew, all I had were email addresses. I tried reaching out many times, but no response. So I did the entire thing myself. Then, at the end of the year, you were told to assign percentages to each other based on how much you felt they had contributed. Bastards gave themselves all huge percentages, and me nothing.
我记得我大学的时候有过一个小组作业，随机分组。我在的那个组我谁都不认识，只有电子邮件地址。我给他们发了很多次邮件，但都没有回应。所以我自己把作业给做完了。然后那年年末，你得根据贡献程度给彼此打分，那帮混蛋给他们自己巨高的分数，我一分没得。
I remember we got given one assignment in Uni, put into random groups. I was in a group with literally nobody I knew, all I had were email addresses. I tried reaching out many times, but no response. So I did the entire thing myself. Then, at the end of the year, you were told to assign percentages to each other based on how much you felt they had contributed. Bastards gave themselves all huge percentages, and me nothing.
我记得我大学的时候有过一个小组作业，随机分组。我在的那个组我谁都不认识，只有电子邮件地址。我给他们发了很多次邮件，但都没有回应。所以我自己把作业给做完了。然后那年年末，你得根据贡献程度给彼此打分，那帮混蛋给他们自己巨高的分数，我一分没得。
EDIT: For all those asking what happened, yes, I did challenge it. Problem was, it was their word against mine. So 4 of them saying one thing, and me saying the other. But when this got questioned, I assume they banded together, and denied what I was claiming. They did concede that I did a lot of of work, but they did still give themselves a lot of credit. I think the final figure was something like me 25%, them 18.75% each. Not ideal... but most of them crashed out before the final year.
编辑：回复一下后来发生了什么，没错，我质疑了。问题在于，是他们联合起来反驳我。所以他们四个人说一样，我一个人说另一样。但学校来问我们的时候，我就觉得他们是商量好了一起否认我说的话。他们妥协了，说我做了很多事情，但他们仍然给自己邀功。我记得最后的数字是我25%，他们每个人18.75%……不理想，但他们基本都在学年结束之前挂科了。
编辑：回复一下后来发生了什么，没错，我质疑了。问题在于，是他们联合起来反驳我。所以他们四个人说一样，我一个人说另一样。但学校来问我们的时候，我就觉得他们是商量好了一起否认我说的话。他们妥协了，说我做了很多事情，但他们仍然给自己邀功。我记得最后的数字是我25%，他们每个人18.75%……不理想，但他们基本都在学年结束之前挂科了。
CPW86
This happened to my sister. She kept all emails digitally and printed everything off. It was 100% one sided, they tried the same trick and she produced all the evidence to show she did everything all on her own and they didn't even respond to any of her communication.
我姐姐也遇到过这种事。她保存了所有邮件的电子副本，并且都打印了下来。剩下几个人也肯定联合起来了，并且他们试过同样的招数，但是然后我姐姐展示了她的证据，一切都是她做的，他们甚至没有回复任何通信。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
This happened to my sister. She kept all emails digitally and printed everything off. It was 100% one sided, they tried the same trick and she produced all the evidence to show she did everything all on her own and they didn't even respond to any of her communication.
我姐姐也遇到过这种事。她保存了所有邮件的电子副本，并且都打印了下来。剩下几个人也肯定联合起来了，并且他们试过同样的招数，但是然后我姐姐展示了她的证据，一切都是她做的，他们甚至没有回复任何通信。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
The rest of her group failed, she was the only person to pass.
他们组剩下的都挂科了，她是唯一一个过了的。
他们组剩下的都挂科了，她是唯一一个过了的。
lovinyourscene
Finding out they have an inner-circle group chat but i'm the only one not in it
发现他们有一个内部小群，我是唯一一个不在里面的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Finding out they have an inner-circle group chat but i'm the only one not in it
发现他们有一个内部小群，我是唯一一个不在里面的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
hawknip
Something similar happened to me. We were all set to go enjoy music at a local establishment. I talked to multiple people from the group, confirming meeting time. I got there and no one else was there. Eventually they all showed up together. Found out they had been out all day together shopping/drinking and I was the only one not clued into that part. I had been looking forward to the night but ended up feeling lower than I had ever felt.
类似的事情我也经历过。我们本来是要一起去当地的音乐节听音乐的。我跟组里的不少人都说过了，确认了碰头的时间。我到那之后发现没人在。最后他们一起出现了。结果他们一整天都在一起逛街、喝酒，我是唯一一个不在的。我之前很期待那天晚上，但结果我比去之前还难过。
Something similar happened to me. We were all set to go enjoy music at a local establishment. I talked to multiple people from the group, confirming meeting time. I got there and no one else was there. Eventually they all showed up together. Found out they had been out all day together shopping/drinking and I was the only one not clued into that part. I had been looking forward to the night but ended up feeling lower than I had ever felt.
类似的事情我也经历过。我们本来是要一起去当地的音乐节听音乐的。我跟组里的不少人都说过了，确认了碰头的时间。我到那之后发现没人在。最后他们一起出现了。结果他们一整天都在一起逛街、喝酒，我是唯一一个不在的。我之前很期待那天晚上，但结果我比去之前还难过。
jamenator24
Same. I found out that they had two groups- one with me and one without. They never used the one with me though.
我也一样。我发现他们有两个群，一个有我的一个没我的。只不过他们从来没用过有我的那个。
Same. I found out that they had two groups- one with me and one without. They never used the one with me though.
我也一样。我发现他们有两个群，一个有我的一个没我的。只不过他们从来没用过有我的那个。
Moebar90
I wouldn't say I have fake friends but I am definitely the periphery friend. The majority of the time if there isn't enough tickets or space in the car for everyone to go do something, I'm the one who gets cut out. It doesn't bother me much but I wish they would be more mindful when talking to me about "things we have done." "Remember when we went to see XXX? Wasn't that fun?" Well, no because I wasn't invited. In those situations it usually gets awkward or they say "Hey, we would have invited you if we had the tickets, space, etc."
我倒没有假朋友，但我肯定是边缘的朋友。大多数时候，假如大家一起出去玩，结果票不够了，或者车子没地方了，那么我肯定是被踢出去的那个。我倒是不太在意，但是我挺希望他们在跟我说“我们之前一起做过的事”的时候走走脑子。“记得我们一起去看XXX的那次吗？是不是特别有意思？”呃，其实不记得，因为那次你们没请我去。在这种情况下一般都会变得很尴尬，或者他们说“嘿，假如我们有多余的票，地方等等，我们就请你去了。”
I wouldn't say I have fake friends but I am definitely the periphery friend. The majority of the time if there isn't enough tickets or space in the car for everyone to go do something, I'm the one who gets cut out. It doesn't bother me much but I wish they would be more mindful when talking to me about "things we have done." "Remember when we went to see XXX? Wasn't that fun?" Well, no because I wasn't invited. In those situations it usually gets awkward or they say "Hey, we would have invited you if we had the tickets, space, etc."
我倒没有假朋友，但我肯定是边缘的朋友。大多数时候，假如大家一起出去玩，结果票不够了，或者车子没地方了，那么我肯定是被踢出去的那个。我倒是不太在意，但是我挺希望他们在跟我说“我们之前一起做过的事”的时候走走脑子。“记得我们一起去看XXX的那次吗？是不是特别有意思？”呃，其实不记得，因为那次你们没请我去。在这种情况下一般都会变得很尴尬，或者他们说“嘿，假如我们有多余的票，地方等等，我们就请你去了。”
rivertam2985
This friend, I'll call her Mary, had kids the same age as mine. We got together for play dates pretty often and our kids would sleep over at each others' houses for weekends. I liked Mary. We would often visit and talk while our kids were playing. One weekend, her kids had stayed at my house. The older one called her mom to see when she was coming to pick her up. I was in the room, and the kid put the phone on speaker for some reason. Mary told the kid what time she would be there and added, "You had better be waiting outside. If I have to go in and spend the next hour talking to rivertam, I'm going to be really pissed."
这个朋友，我叫她玛丽吧，她家孩子跟我家的差不多大。我们家孩子经常一起玩，周末的时候会去彼此家里过夜。我挺喜欢玛丽的。在孩子们玩的时候，我们会互相串门聊天。有一个周末，她家的孩子来我家玩。大的那个给妈妈打电话，问她什么时候接自己回家。我当时在房间里，那个孩子开了免提。玛丽跟孩子说了她什么时候过去，然后加了一句，“你最好在外面等着，不然假如我得进门去再跟她聊一个小时，我可就真的要生气了。”
This friend, I'll call her Mary, had kids the same age as mine. We got together for play dates pretty often and our kids would sleep over at each others' houses for weekends. I liked Mary. We would often visit and talk while our kids were playing. One weekend, her kids had stayed at my house. The older one called her mom to see when she was coming to pick her up. I was in the room, and the kid put the phone on speaker for some reason. Mary told the kid what time she would be there and added, "You had better be waiting outside. If I have to go in and spend the next hour talking to rivertam, I'm going to be really pissed."
这个朋友，我叫她玛丽吧，她家孩子跟我家的差不多大。我们家孩子经常一起玩，周末的时候会去彼此家里过夜。我挺喜欢玛丽的。在孩子们玩的时候，我们会互相串门聊天。有一个周末，她家的孩子来我家玩。大的那个给妈妈打电话，问她什么时候接自己回家。我当时在房间里，那个孩子开了免提。玛丽跟孩子说了她什么时候过去，然后加了一句，“你最好在外面等着，不然假如我得进门去再跟她聊一个小时，我可就真的要生气了。”
We didn't spend much time together after that.
在那之后我们就没再共处过太长时间。
在那之后我们就没再共处过太长时间。
Edit: I'm getting a lot of similar questions and comments, so I'll add an edit here instead of writing the same answer a dozen times.
编辑：很多人给我发来一样的问题和评论，所以我在这里统一回复一下。
编辑：很多人给我发来一样的问题和评论，所以我在这里统一回复一下。
Did I overreact? Was Mary just having a bad day and not want to talk? And, my personal favorite, "Rivertam, maybe you're just insufferable?"
我反应过度了吗？玛丽是不是那天过得不太好，只是不想说话？以及我最喜欢的，“楼主，是不是你自己太让人受不了？”
我反应过度了吗？玛丽是不是那天过得不太好，只是不想说话？以及我最喜欢的，“楼主，是不是你自己太让人受不了？”
Here's what happened after I overheard my friend say that to her child:
在我不小心听到我的那位朋友对她的孩子说的话之后，我做了这些事：
在我不小心听到我的那位朋友对她的孩子说的话之后，我做了这些事：
I simply stopped initiating contact and wasn't as available to do stuff for her. When we dropped off or picked up the kids, I smiled and waved. I let the kids make the plans for play dates. I no longer had time to help her with her garden or watch her kids while she went out with another friend (they were into long distance running, which is not my cup of tea). She never contacted me unless she wanted something. This had always been true, but I had not realized it. The "friendship" eventually fizzled out on its own. So, I guess it had never been much of a friendship to begin with. I just didn't realize it until she opened my eyes.
我不再发起和她的联系，也不再有空为她做各种事情。我们接送孩子的时候，我只是笑一笑，对她挥挥手。我让孩子们自己计划串门玩。我不再腾出时间帮她打理她的花园，或是在她和别的朋友出门的时候看护她家的孩子（他们喜欢长跑，我不太喜欢）。除了需要什么东西之外，她从没主动联系过我。一直以来都是这样，只不过我没有意识到。“友谊”最终自己慢慢消退了。所以我猜一开始也不是什么友谊。我只是没有意识到，直到她让我睁开眼睛。
我不再发起和她的联系，也不再有空为她做各种事情。我们接送孩子的时候，我只是笑一笑，对她挥挥手。我让孩子们自己计划串门玩。我不再腾出时间帮她打理她的花园，或是在她和别的朋友出门的时候看护她家的孩子（他们喜欢长跑，我不太喜欢）。除了需要什么东西之外，她从没主动联系过我。一直以来都是这样，只不过我没有意识到。“友谊”最终自己慢慢消退了。所以我猜一开始也不是什么友谊。我只是没有意识到，直到她让我睁开眼睛。
CalderaCraven
I think this is especially shitty... Mom friends are hard enough to find, then to realize that they didn't even want to hang with you. And because your kiddos are friends you don't necessarily want to blow that up by calling the fake mom friend out.
我觉得这种情况尤为糟糕……妈友本来就很难找，意识到他们甚至不想和你一起玩更令人难过。而且因为你们家的孩子跟他们家孩子是朋友，你还不能直接和那个虚假的妈友断交。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I think this is especially shitty... Mom friends are hard enough to find, then to realize that they didn't even want to hang with you. And because your kiddos are friends you don't necessarily want to blow that up by calling the fake mom friend out.
我觉得这种情况尤为糟糕……妈友本来就很难找，意识到他们甚至不想和你一起玩更令人难过。而且因为你们家的孩子跟他们家孩子是朋友，你还不能直接和那个虚假的妈友断交。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I tried to have mom friends, but it failed 3 times, and that was enough for me.
我试过和其他妈妈交朋友，但失败了三次，我已经受够了。
我试过和其他妈妈交朋友，但失败了三次，我已经受够了。
rivertam2985
I still have one, even though our kids are grown. I remember meeting her and just feeling so comfortable. No bullshit. A lot of kindness and compassion. She's the kind of friend that you can lose contact with for a while, then pick up again as if no time has gone past. Our 4 kids (2 hers and 2 mine) have an apartment together (they're in college). It was something the kids put together on their own and they're doing really well.
我还有一个，尽管我们的孩子都已经长大了。我记得我和她相遇的时候就非常舒适。没有废话。善意和热情。她是那种你可以有一阵子不联系，但再联系上仍然好像时光没有流逝一样。我们的四个孩子（她家的两个和我家的两个）一起住一间公寓（他们上大学）。这是孩子们自己的友谊，并且他们成长得非常好。
I still have one, even though our kids are grown. I remember meeting her and just feeling so comfortable. No bullshit. A lot of kindness and compassion. She's the kind of friend that you can lose contact with for a while, then pick up again as if no time has gone past. Our 4 kids (2 hers and 2 mine) have an apartment together (they're in college). It was something the kids put together on their own and they're doing really well.
我还有一个，尽管我们的孩子都已经长大了。我记得我和她相遇的时候就非常舒适。没有废话。善意和热情。她是那种你可以有一阵子不联系，但再联系上仍然好像时光没有流逝一样。我们的四个孩子（她家的两个和我家的两个）一起住一间公寓（他们上大学）。这是孩子们自己的友谊，并且他们成长得非常好。
BurlHopsBridge
When you lose your 'worth' to them. For instance, you are going through a dark period in your life, then they just leave like you are a worthless bag of dust.
当你失去你自己对他们的价值，比如你在度过人生中比较黑暗的一段时期，他们就会像一团没有用处的尘土一样把你丢在地上。
When you lose your 'worth' to them. For instance, you are going through a dark period in your life, then they just leave like you are a worthless bag of dust.
当你失去你自己对他们的价值，比如你在度过人生中比较黑暗的一段时期，他们就会像一团没有用处的尘土一样把你丢在地上。
JohnnyJayce
When I realized I was the one always calling. Then I stopped and "friends" disappeared.
当我意识到我是那个一直打电话的人的时候。我不再打电话了，“朋友”们也就消失了。
When I realized I was the one always calling. Then I stopped and "friends" disappeared.
当我意识到我是那个一直打电话的人的时候。我不再打电话了，“朋友”们也就消失了。
HereTodayIGuess
When my long time "friend" called me and said "Hey can you hang out? No one else can."
在我交了很久的“朋友”给我打电话，跟我说“嘿你能出来玩吗？别人都不行。”
When my long time "friend" called me and said "Hey can you hang out? No one else can."
在我交了很久的“朋友”给我打电话，跟我说“嘿你能出来玩吗？别人都不行。”
thenextsherlock16
My so-called 'friends' invited me to a party, and then at the last moment, they texted the group that no one's coming and the party is canceled. Well.. they had the party that day. Everyone went there. They just had decided they didn't want me there cause I was boring and not a fun person, so they told me that there was no party happening. It hurt a lot, it was a terrible day for me.
我所谓的“朋友们”邀请我去一个派对，然后在最后一刻，他们在群里发消息说没人来了，派对不办了。其实……他们那天还是办了派对。别人都去了。他们只是决定不想让我过去，因为我很无聊，没意思。所以他们告诉我没有派对。很令人难过，对我来说是非常糟糕的一天。
My so-called 'friends' invited me to a party, and then at the last moment, they texted the group that no one's coming and the party is canceled. Well.. they had the party that day. Everyone went there. They just had decided they didn't want me there cause I was boring and not a fun person, so they told me that there was no party happening. It hurt a lot, it was a terrible day for me.
我所谓的“朋友们”邀请我去一个派对，然后在最后一刻，他们在群里发消息说没人来了，派对不办了。其实……他们那天还是办了派对。别人都去了。他们只是决定不想让我过去，因为我很无聊，没意思。所以他们告诉我没有派对。很令人难过，对我来说是非常糟糕的一天。
BrotherOfTheOrder
When you try to open up and try to share a genuine conversation about something going on in your life and all they can do it crack jokes and try to get you to go out drinking with them. Made me realize how surface level many “friendships” really are.
当你尝试打开自己的心灵，和朋友们分享一段你的人生中正在发生的事情，进行一段深入的对话的时候，他们能做的只有讲笑话和让你出去和他们喝酒。让我意识到我有很多的“友谊”是多么肤浅。
When you try to open up and try to share a genuine conversation about something going on in your life and all they can do it crack jokes and try to get you to go out drinking with them. Made me realize how surface level many “friendships” really are.
当你尝试打开自己的心灵，和朋友们分享一段你的人生中正在发生的事情，进行一段深入的对话的时候，他们能做的只有讲笑话和让你出去和他们喝酒。让我意识到我有很多的“友谊”是多么肤浅。
Then you have the opposite of that - 3 guys I’ve known since I was a freshman in high school. Been friends for over 15 years. Have stayed in touch through all of us getting married, having kids, and moving to completely separate areas or the country. Yet whenever we’re within an hour of each other we always make a point to get breakfast and catch up (this usually turns into 3+ hour conversations). This may only happen once or twice a year, but I consider those guys my best friends. That’s real friendship and I’m fortunate to have them.
然后还有与之相反的友谊——高一的时候认识的三个朋友。十五年来一直都是朋友。即便我们都结婚了，生了孩子，去了不同的区域甚至国家，我们仍然一直保持者联系。但是只要我们能凑到一个小时之内的距离，我们就一定会一起吃个早饭，一起聊一聊（通常会变成三个多小时的对话）。可能一年只能发生一两次，但是我仍然认为这些人是我最好的朋友。这是真正的友谊，我很幸运我能拥有这种朋友。
然后还有与之相反的友谊——高一的时候认识的三个朋友。十五年来一直都是朋友。即便我们都结婚了，生了孩子，去了不同的区域甚至国家，我们仍然一直保持者联系。但是只要我们能凑到一个小时之内的距离，我们就一定会一起吃个早饭，一起聊一聊（通常会变成三个多小时的对话）。可能一年只能发生一两次，但是我仍然认为这些人是我最好的朋友。这是真正的友谊，我很幸运我能拥有这种朋友。
powerlesshero111
I'm still best friends with my best friend from 2nd grade. We live on opposite ends of the country now. We make it a point to visit each other once a year, sometimes where we live, sometimesa random new city (we went to Portland, OR last year). Almost 30 years of friendship. We've been there for each other through all the hard times, and i get to be there for his wedding next year.
我和我二年级时交到的朋友仍然是最好的朋友。我们现在住在国家的两头。我们每年都会彼此探望一次，有时是我们住的地方，有时是完全没去过的城市（去年我们去了波特兰）。快三十年的友谊。我们经历了很多困难，但仍然在一起，并且明年我会去参加他的婚礼。
I'm still best friends with my best friend from 2nd grade. We live on opposite ends of the country now. We make it a point to visit each other once a year, sometimes where we live, sometimesa random new city (we went to Portland, OR last year). Almost 30 years of friendship. We've been there for each other through all the hard times, and i get to be there for his wedding next year.
我和我二年级时交到的朋友仍然是最好的朋友。我们现在住在国家的两头。我们每年都会彼此探望一次，有时是我们住的地方，有时是完全没去过的城市（去年我们去了波特兰）。快三十年的友谊。我们经历了很多困难，但仍然在一起，并且明年我会去参加他的婚礼。
Friendships are easy when you're a kid, but get harder with age. You have shit going on in your life that just makes it harder to hang out with people. But you make time for those who really matter.
当你是个孩子的时候，交朋友是件很容易的事，但随着年龄增长会越来越难。你的人生总会发生各种各样的事情，让你越来越难以和别人一起打发时间。但你会为那些真正重要的人腾出时间的。
当你是个孩子的时候，交朋友是件很容易的事，但随着年龄增长会越来越难。你的人生总会发生各种各样的事情，让你越来越难以和别人一起打发时间。但你会为那些真正重要的人腾出时间的。
LizFrance
When they abandoned me when I was going through a rough time. When I spent years listening and supporting them. When I have my first true moment where I am not coping and need support, they are nowhere to be seen and bitching behind my back. This is when I realised my high school friends never had grown up past high school. Luckily I had other friends. Just not a large girl group like that. But I can actually say that every friend I have I know they have my back and won't judge me if I am not always happy. And the same for me. I have always had very high expectations of myself as a friend and I feel that everyone I call a friend is someone that brings something special to my life. That is worth more than having a huge group of bitchy girlfriends who turn on each other when they are out of the room. It took me a long time to realize it though.
在我经历一段非常难过的时间之后她们抛弃了我。我几年以来一直聆听着她们的抱怨，为她们提供着支持。在我第一次真的需要支持的时候，我却找不到她们的人，在我背后说闲话。那时我才意识到，我的高中朋友们在高中毕业之后就再也没长大。幸运的是我还有其他朋友。只不过不是那样一大群女生。但我可以说我认识的每个朋友都支持我，并且不会因为我难过而批判我。对我来说也是一样。我对于我自己作为朋友的样子总是有非常高的标准，并且我觉得每一个被我称为朋友的人都是一个能给我的生命带来一些特别的东西的人。这比起拥有一群只会谁不在就说谁的闲话的小闺蜜要有价值的多。但对我来说花了很久我才意识到这一点。
When they abandoned me when I was going through a rough time. When I spent years listening and supporting them. When I have my first true moment where I am not coping and need support, they are nowhere to be seen and bitching behind my back. This is when I realised my high school friends never had grown up past high school. Luckily I had other friends. Just not a large girl group like that. But I can actually say that every friend I have I know they have my back and won't judge me if I am not always happy. And the same for me. I have always had very high expectations of myself as a friend and I feel that everyone I call a friend is someone that brings something special to my life. That is worth more than having a huge group of bitchy girlfriends who turn on each other when they are out of the room. It took me a long time to realize it though.
在我经历一段非常难过的时间之后她们抛弃了我。我几年以来一直聆听着她们的抱怨，为她们提供着支持。在我第一次真的需要支持的时候，我却找不到她们的人，在我背后说闲话。那时我才意识到，我的高中朋友们在高中毕业之后就再也没长大。幸运的是我还有其他朋友。只不过不是那样一大群女生。但我可以说我认识的每个朋友都支持我，并且不会因为我难过而批判我。对我来说也是一样。我对于我自己作为朋友的样子总是有非常高的标准，并且我觉得每一个被我称为朋友的人都是一个能给我的生命带来一些特别的东西的人。这比起拥有一群只会谁不在就说谁的闲话的小闺蜜要有价值的多。但对我来说花了很久我才意识到这一点。
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