你有没有曾经 一瞬间不再尊重某人（一）
正文翻译
Have you ever lost any respect for someone instantly?
你有没有曾经 一瞬间不再尊重某人
Have you ever lost any respect for someone instantly?
你有没有曾经 一瞬间不再尊重某人
评论翻译
April Taurean
I am about to tell you the story of the worst human being that ever existed. Her name is Anne. Anne was married to my uncle-in-law, Bill. To begin, I want you to think of how many people that you personally know who have been through a house fire. Now, how many times have you known a family to have been through MULTIPLE house fires. How about the same family going through 4 house fires? Every time - there was an outpouring from the community and she pulled a tidy sum thanks to insurance pay outs.
One day, one of her children, now an adult, approached my husband (their cousin) and asked if we could help them pay $700 to the utility company so they could get electric hooked up in their name. After choking for a bit, we asked how they owed $700 when they hadn't had electricity before? They said when Ann and their dad couldn't afford to pay the electric bills in their own names, they found out they could open credit and utilities in their KID'S names. The bill got up to $700 before the power company cut off the service in that cousin's name which is why they needed that much. Unfortunately, we didn't have $700 to help them out so I don't know how that resolved.
我要告诉你一个有史以来最坏的人的故事。她的名字叫安妮。安妮嫁给了我的舅舅比尔。首先，我想让你们想想你认识的人中有多少人经历过房屋火灾。如果同一个家庭经历了四场火灾呢?每一次，都有来自社区的大量捐款，由于保险赔偿，她得到了一大笔钱。
有一天，她的一个孩子(现在已经成年了)找到我丈夫(他们的表弟)，问我们能否帮他们向公用事业公司支付700美元，这样他们就可以以他们的名义接上电了。在哽噎了一会儿之后，我们问他们怎么欠了700美元，而他们之前没用电吗?他们说，当安妮和他们的父亲无法以自己的名义支付电费时，他们发现他们可以以孩子的名义开通信贷和公用事业。在电力公司把以表弟的名义所开户头切断供电之前，账单高达700美元，这就是为什么他们需要这么多钱。不幸的是，我们没有700美元来帮助他们，所以我不知道怎么解决的。
I am about to tell you the story of the worst human being that ever existed. Her name is Anne. Anne was married to my uncle-in-law, Bill. To begin, I want you to think of how many people that you personally know who have been through a house fire. Now, how many times have you known a family to have been through MULTIPLE house fires. How about the same family going through 4 house fires? Every time - there was an outpouring from the community and she pulled a tidy sum thanks to insurance pay outs.
One day, one of her children, now an adult, approached my husband (their cousin) and asked if we could help them pay $700 to the utility company so they could get electric hooked up in their name. After choking for a bit, we asked how they owed $700 when they hadn't had electricity before? They said when Ann and their dad couldn't afford to pay the electric bills in their own names, they found out they could open credit and utilities in their KID'S names. The bill got up to $700 before the power company cut off the service in that cousin's name which is why they needed that much. Unfortunately, we didn't have $700 to help them out so I don't know how that resolved.
我要告诉你一个有史以来最坏的人的故事。她的名字叫安妮。安妮嫁给了我的舅舅比尔。首先，我想让你们想想你认识的人中有多少人经历过房屋火灾。如果同一个家庭经历了四场火灾呢?每一次，都有来自社区的大量捐款，由于保险赔偿，她得到了一大笔钱。
有一天，她的一个孩子(现在已经成年了)找到我丈夫(他们的表弟)，问我们能否帮他们向公用事业公司支付700美元，这样他们就可以以他们的名义接上电了。在哽噎了一会儿之后，我们问他们怎么欠了700美元，而他们之前没用电吗?他们说，当安妮和他们的父亲无法以自己的名义支付电费时，他们发现他们可以以孩子的名义开通信贷和公用事业。在电力公司把以表弟的名义所开户头切断供电之前，账单高达700美元，这就是为什么他们需要这么多钱。不幸的是，我们没有700美元来帮助他们，所以我不知道怎么解决的。
One day, my husband's maternal grandparents admitted that they needed help around the house. Help with keeping up with what bills to pay, help with driving because their eyesight was getting bad, and help around the house with cleaning. Anne was quick to volunteer. I had a bad feeling- like letting the fox into the chicken coop. About a year later, my husband's grandfather saw a differently colored envelope from the mortgage company: it was a final notice. The amount they were demanding was for about 6 mos of unpaid mortgage payments, + interest and various other penalties. As he started to collect other bills, he found everything had been unpaid for months. They were forced out of their home and ended up moving into a small apartment next door to my in-laws. Anne had no good answer for how things didn't get paid. By this time - almost every one hated Anne.
某天，我丈夫的外祖父母承认他们在家里需要帮助。因为他们的视力越来越差，需要有人帮他们支付账单，帮他们开车，帮他们打扫房间。安妮很快就成为了志愿者。我有一种不好的感觉——就像让狐狸进鸡窝一样。大约一年后，我丈夫的祖父看到一个不同颜色的信封，这是来自抵押贷款公司的信：最后通知。他们要求的金额是大约6个月未付的抵押贷款、利息和其他各种罚款。当他开始收集其他账单时，他发现所有的东西都已经好几个月没付了。他们被迫离开家，最后搬进了我公婆隔壁的一间小公寓。安妮对此没有合理的解释：为什么没有去付清该付的款项。这时，几乎每个人都恨安妮。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
某天，我丈夫的外祖父母承认他们在家里需要帮助。因为他们的视力越来越差，需要有人帮他们支付账单，帮他们开车，帮他们打扫房间。安妮很快就成为了志愿者。我有一种不好的感觉——就像让狐狸进鸡窝一样。大约一年后，我丈夫的祖父看到一个不同颜色的信封，这是来自抵押贷款公司的信：最后通知。他们要求的金额是大约6个月未付的抵押贷款、利息和其他各种罚款。当他开始收集其他账单时，他发现所有的东西都已经好几个月没付了。他们被迫离开家，最后搬进了我公婆隔壁的一间小公寓。安妮对此没有合理的解释：为什么没有去付清该付的款项。这时，几乎每个人都恨安妮。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
My husband's grandparents were depressed from the situation and passed away within mos of losing their house. My mother-in-law was tasked with cleaning out the apartment but was too depressed to go in there the first week after her last parent passed. After a week, she entered the apartment and found Anne and Bill asleep in the grandparents bed! It had also been obvious that they had helped themselves to property and had made piles of more things of value that they were going to take off with. My husband and his father were called over and it got nasty between my mother-in-law and her brother, Bill over Anne - but they (Anne and Bill) were forced to leave empty handed.
我丈夫的祖父母因这种情况而沮丧，在失去房子的几分钟内去世了。我岳母的任务是打扫公寓，但在她最后一位父母去世后的第一个星期，她因太沮丧了而无法进去。一周以后，她走进公寓，发现安妮和比尔睡在祖父母的床上！同样显而易见的是，他们攫取了财产，并购买了大量有价值的东西，这些东西都是他们准备带走的。我丈夫和他的父亲被叫了过来，我岳母和她的兄弟比尔之间的关系变得很糟糕，他们（安妮和比尔）被迫空手而归。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
我丈夫的祖父母因这种情况而沮丧，在失去房子的几分钟内去世了。我岳母的任务是打扫公寓，但在她最后一位父母去世后的第一个星期，她因太沮丧了而无法进去。一周以后，她走进公寓，发现安妮和比尔睡在祖父母的床上！同样显而易见的是，他们攫取了财产，并购买了大量有价值的东西，这些东西都是他们准备带走的。我丈夫和他的父亲被叫了过来，我岳母和她的兄弟比尔之间的关系变得很糟糕，他们（安妮和比尔）被迫空手而归。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
A couple of years ago, Bill was found dead in his livingroom by Anne. Turns out he died from a brain aneurysm. I told my husband that I don't know HOW she did it, but I know she had to have killed him. Anne got a tidy insurance payout. She also got remarried about 6 mos after Bill died. She's had a side business as an assisted living nurse. She helps elderly people out with their meds, treatments, runs them to appointments and cleans houses. Someone said she was driving a new truck that a client gave her because they agreed they were too old to drive themselves and Anne could use it more.
So, I have zero respect for her. I was 18 the first time I met Anne and she was so nice and personable. She was gracious and easy to get along with. She also LOOKS simple - but she is constantly looking for an angle and is a really good con-artist. She also sues over the smallest of slights against her. She is a …horrible…person.
几年前，安妮发现比尔死在起居室里。结论是他死于脑动脉瘤。我告诉我丈夫我不知道她是怎么做的，但我知道一定是她杀了他。安妮得到了一笔可观的保险费。比尔死后6个月左右，她又再婚了。她做过副业：辅助生活护士。她帮助安排老年人吃药、治疗、安排预约和打扫房间。有人说她在开一辆客户给她的新卡车，因为他们认为他们太老了，不能自己开车，因此安妮可以更多地使用它。
所以，我对她一点也不尊重。我第一次见到安妮时才18岁，她非常和蔼可亲。她有礼貌，容易相处。她看起来也很简单，但她一直在寻找某个角度，是一个非常厉害的骗子。超级滑。她还会因为（某人对她）哪怕是最轻微的侮辱而提起诉讼。她是一个可怕的人。
So, I have zero respect for her. I was 18 the first time I met Anne and she was so nice and personable. She was gracious and easy to get along with. She also LOOKS simple - but she is constantly looking for an angle and is a really good con-artist. She also sues over the smallest of slights against her. She is a …horrible…person.
几年前，安妮发现比尔死在起居室里。结论是他死于脑动脉瘤。我告诉我丈夫我不知道她是怎么做的，但我知道一定是她杀了他。安妮得到了一笔可观的保险费。比尔死后6个月左右，她又再婚了。她做过副业：辅助生活护士。她帮助安排老年人吃药、治疗、安排预约和打扫房间。有人说她在开一辆客户给她的新卡车，因为他们认为他们太老了，不能自己开车，因此安妮可以更多地使用它。
所以，我对她一点也不尊重。我第一次见到安妮时才18岁，她非常和蔼可亲。她有礼貌，容易相处。她看起来也很简单，但她一直在寻找某个角度，是一个非常厉害的骗子。超级滑。她还会因为（某人对她）哪怕是最轻微的侮辱而提起诉讼。她是一个可怕的人。
Kathleen, I have measured out my life with lithium & cat food cans
Long ago, I had started to have some suspicions about a man I was seeing (Jimmy), but as was all too common in my younger days when I was hot on the trail of a potential soulmate, I was choosing to ignore my “little voice.” Sometimes Jimmy seemed so perfect, I thought I didn't deserve him, and other times I just thought, this man is too good to be true. As it happens, both of those thoughts were accurate.
First, I happened to meet one of Jimmy's old roommates who came to town. The guy was nice enough. About ten years had passed since they had seen each other, and the roommate was astonished at the way Jimmy had changed. He kept saying so. He couldn't get over it. (Jimmy, I can't believe it. Jimmy, look at you now, man! Jimmy, look at this place — remember our apartment?) And Jimmy, not feeling the nostalgia, was increasingly uncomfortable — not humbly awkward, not embarrassed by the attention, but more like he was afraid he was about to be exposed. And although I didn't put it together at the time, the roommate was especially surprised that so many of the things Jimmy was saying and doing and using to describe himself and his life now were the things that the roommate used to say/do/be, things that Jimmy was never interested in or had outright rejected. It was as if Jimmy had decided to “turn into” his old roommate. Why not? He had no reason to think he would ever see him again. I know this sounds like “the Talented Mr. Ripley,” but it is absolutely true So that was a large red flag.
很久以前，我就开始对一个我正在约会的男人（吉米）产生一些怀疑，但在我年轻的时候，我热衷于寻找一个潜在的灵魂伴侣时，我总是选择忽略我的“潜意识”。有时吉米看起来很完美，我认为我配不上他，而其他时候我只是想，这个人太好了，不可能是真实的。碰巧的是，这两种想法都是准确的。
首先，我碰巧遇到了吉米的一个老室友，他来到了镇上。那家伙人很好。他们已经有十年没见面了，室友对吉米的变化感到很惊讶。吉米，我简直不敢相信。吉米，看看你，伙计！吉米，看看这个地方——还记得我们的公寓吗？吉米，没有怀旧的感觉，越来越不舒服——不是谦逊的尴尬，不是被关注而尴尬，而是更像是他害怕自己即将被曝光。虽然当时我没把它放在心上,室友特别惊讶的是，吉米在描述他自己和他现在的生活时所说的、所做的、所用的很多事情都是室友过去常说的、做的、参与过的，而当时吉米对这件事从不感兴趣或都是断然拒绝。了。就好像吉米决定“变成”他的老室友一样。为什么不呢？他没有理由认为他会再见到他。我知道这听起来像是“天才的里普利先生”，但这绝对是真的，所以这是一个巨大的危险信号。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Long ago, I had started to have some suspicions about a man I was seeing (Jimmy), but as was all too common in my younger days when I was hot on the trail of a potential soulmate, I was choosing to ignore my “little voice.” Sometimes Jimmy seemed so perfect, I thought I didn't deserve him, and other times I just thought, this man is too good to be true. As it happens, both of those thoughts were accurate.
First, I happened to meet one of Jimmy's old roommates who came to town. The guy was nice enough. About ten years had passed since they had seen each other, and the roommate was astonished at the way Jimmy had changed. He kept saying so. He couldn't get over it. (Jimmy, I can't believe it. Jimmy, look at you now, man! Jimmy, look at this place — remember our apartment?) And Jimmy, not feeling the nostalgia, was increasingly uncomfortable — not humbly awkward, not embarrassed by the attention, but more like he was afraid he was about to be exposed. And although I didn't put it together at the time, the roommate was especially surprised that so many of the things Jimmy was saying and doing and using to describe himself and his life now were the things that the roommate used to say/do/be, things that Jimmy was never interested in or had outright rejected. It was as if Jimmy had decided to “turn into” his old roommate. Why not? He had no reason to think he would ever see him again. I know this sounds like “the Talented Mr. Ripley,” but it is absolutely true So that was a large red flag.
很久以前，我就开始对一个我正在约会的男人（吉米）产生一些怀疑，但在我年轻的时候，我热衷于寻找一个潜在的灵魂伴侣时，我总是选择忽略我的“潜意识”。有时吉米看起来很完美，我认为我配不上他，而其他时候我只是想，这个人太好了，不可能是真实的。碰巧的是，这两种想法都是准确的。
首先，我碰巧遇到了吉米的一个老室友，他来到了镇上。那家伙人很好。他们已经有十年没见面了，室友对吉米的变化感到很惊讶。吉米，我简直不敢相信。吉米，看看你，伙计！吉米，看看这个地方——还记得我们的公寓吗？吉米，没有怀旧的感觉，越来越不舒服——不是谦逊的尴尬，不是被关注而尴尬，而是更像是他害怕自己即将被曝光。虽然当时我没把它放在心上,室友特别惊讶的是，吉米在描述他自己和他现在的生活时所说的、所做的、所用的很多事情都是室友过去常说的、做的、参与过的，而当时吉米对这件事从不感兴趣或都是断然拒绝。了。就好像吉米决定“变成”他的老室友一样。为什么不呢？他没有理由认为他会再见到他。我知道这听起来像是“天才的里普利先生”，但这绝对是真的，所以这是一个巨大的危险信号。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Second, I met Jimmy's family, not just his siblings but parents. It had been awhile for them too. They couldn't believe his “transformation” either. (Can this be our Jimmy? Jimmy, I wouldn't have recognized you, buddy. You never used to have long hair. You never used to drink.)
I immediately lost any interest in a relationship with Jimmy. I really could not get away from him fast enough. It would be fair to say that he made my skin crawl. The way he behaved toward me when we “officially” split up was anything but open-minded and laid back. It confirmed that the old Jimmy was indeed alive and well and had just been in hiding. I'm sure it would have only been a matter of time before the old Jimmy had been turned on me.
And to add one final note, I heard from someone who knew us that when we split, Jimmy briefly turned into a businessman.
第二，我见到了吉米的家人，不仅仅是他的兄弟姐妹，还有他的父母。对他们来说也有一段时间没见了。他们也无法相信他的“转变”：这是我们的吉米吗？吉米，我无法认出你，伙计。你从来没有留过长头发。你从来不喝酒。
我立刻对和吉米保持关系失去了兴趣。我真做不到尽快摆脱他。公平地说，他让我毛骨悚然。当我们“正式”分手时，他对我的态度一点也不开明。它证实了老吉米确实还活着，身体健康，刚刚只是躲藏起来。我敢肯定，老吉米背叛我只是时间问题。
最后一点，我从认识我们的人那里听说，当我们分手时，吉米瞬间变成了一名商人。
I immediately lost any interest in a relationship with Jimmy. I really could not get away from him fast enough. It would be fair to say that he made my skin crawl. The way he behaved toward me when we “officially” split up was anything but open-minded and laid back. It confirmed that the old Jimmy was indeed alive and well and had just been in hiding. I'm sure it would have only been a matter of time before the old Jimmy had been turned on me.
And to add one final note, I heard from someone who knew us that when we split, Jimmy briefly turned into a businessman.
第二，我见到了吉米的家人，不仅仅是他的兄弟姐妹，还有他的父母。对他们来说也有一段时间没见了。他们也无法相信他的“转变”：这是我们的吉米吗？吉米，我无法认出你，伙计。你从来没有留过长头发。你从来不喝酒。
我立刻对和吉米保持关系失去了兴趣。我真做不到尽快摆脱他。公平地说，他让我毛骨悚然。当我们“正式”分手时，他对我的态度一点也不开明。它证实了老吉米确实还活着，身体健康，刚刚只是躲藏起来。我敢肯定，老吉米背叛我只是时间问题。
最后一点，我从认识我们的人那里听说，当我们分手时，吉米瞬间变成了一名商人。
Nitha Fredy, MTech from Visvesvaraya National Institute of Technology, Nagpur (2019)
My friend and her father.
It was 2010 and I was in class 10th. I had a pretty close friend back then who lived in the same neighbourhood. Let’s call her J.
So, J had got into pretty bad influences during that time and she had a secret cellphone.
One day, she knocked at my door, handed me a novel of hers(a reason to get out of her house) and said that she is going out with some guy she have been chatting with for a while. Gave me her secret number and asked me to call her if someone came fetching for her.
I said OK. After 3 hours or so her younger brother came searching for her and I lied that she just left.
This drama continued for a while. I kept calling her phone and requesting her to come back to her house.
It started getting dark outside and her phone was no more reachable. Meanwhile my mother started questioning.
我的朋友和她的父亲。
那是2010年，我在10班。那时我有一个非常亲密的朋友，他住在同一个街区。我们叫她“J”。
在那段时间里，J感染了不好的习惯，她有一部秘密手机。
有一天，她敲了我的门，递给我一本她的小说（一个她要离开家的理由），说她要和一个和她聊了一段时间的男人出去。给了我她的秘密号码，如果有人来接她的话，让我给她打电话。
我说可以。大约三个小时后，她的弟弟来找她，我谎称她刚离开。
这场戏持续了一段时间。我不停地给她打电话，要求她回家。
外面开始天黑了，她的电话变成无法接通。与此同时，我母亲开始追问我她的去向。
My friend and her father.
It was 2010 and I was in class 10th. I had a pretty close friend back then who lived in the same neighbourhood. Let’s call her J.
So, J had got into pretty bad influences during that time and she had a secret cellphone.
One day, she knocked at my door, handed me a novel of hers(a reason to get out of her house) and said that she is going out with some guy she have been chatting with for a while. Gave me her secret number and asked me to call her if someone came fetching for her.
I said OK. After 3 hours or so her younger brother came searching for her and I lied that she just left.
This drama continued for a while. I kept calling her phone and requesting her to come back to her house.
It started getting dark outside and her phone was no more reachable. Meanwhile my mother started questioning.
我的朋友和她的父亲。
那是2010年，我在10班。那时我有一个非常亲密的朋友，他住在同一个街区。我们叫她“J”。
在那段时间里，J感染了不好的习惯，她有一部秘密手机。
有一天，她敲了我的门，递给我一本她的小说（一个她要离开家的理由），说她要和一个和她聊了一段时间的男人出去。给了我她的秘密号码，如果有人来接她的话，让我给她打电话。
我说可以。大约三个小时后，她的弟弟来找她，我谎称她刚离开。
这场戏持续了一段时间。我不停地给她打电话，要求她回家。
外面开始天黑了，她的电话变成无法接通。与此同时，我母亲开始追问我她的去向。
I broke down and told my mother the truth. Mind you I was 15. My mother immediately took me to her house and made me say the truth to her family.
Then the search mission for her continued for 3 hours. My dad joined the search mission. Contacted everyone we knew. All friends. Went searching in our neighbourhood and beyond.
Finally found her! She was fine but afraid to come back home.
My parents and me returned to our place.
我经不住把真相告诉了我母亲。请注意，当时我15岁。我母亲立即带我到她家，让我对她的家人说实话。
随后，对她持续搜索3个小时。我爸爸加入了搜寻队伍。联系了我们认识的每个人和所有的朋友，搜寻地点在我们附近和稍远一些地方。
终于找到她了！她很好，但不敢回家。
我父母和我随后回家。
Then the search mission for her continued for 3 hours. My dad joined the search mission. Contacted everyone we knew. All friends. Went searching in our neighbourhood and beyond.
Finally found her! She was fine but afraid to come back home.
My parents and me returned to our place.
我经不住把真相告诉了我母亲。请注意，当时我15岁。我母亲立即带我到她家，让我对她的家人说实话。
随后，对她持续搜索3个小时。我爸爸加入了搜寻队伍。联系了我们认识的每个人和所有的朋友，搜寻地点在我们附近和稍远一些地方。
终于找到她了！她很好，但不敢回家。
我父母和我随后回家。
Now the twist.
Her father called my mother the next day. And said something along the lines.
Please ask your daughter to stay away from my daughter. Your daughter have spoiled my daughter.
My mom was shocked.
J was the one who lied to her parents and went for an adventure ride to meet guys she barely knew.
And somehow, I became a bad person to inform them that she did it rather than waiting for her to be dead in some ditch.
That day I lost respect for her Dad because he couldn’t accept his daughter’s mistake and had the audacity to call my mother and say those awful things.
转折点来了：
她父亲第二天打电话给我母亲。并说了一些类似的话：请叫你女儿离我女儿远点；你女儿带坏了我女儿。
我妈妈很震惊。
J就是那个向父母撒谎，冒险去见她几乎不认识的男人的人。
不知怎的，我变成了一个坏人，要知道是我告诉他们她这么做了，而不是等她死在沟里。
那天，我不再尊重她父亲，因为他不能接受他女儿的错误，竟然厚颜无耻地打电话给我母亲，说了那些可怕的话。
Her father called my mother the next day. And said something along the lines.
Please ask your daughter to stay away from my daughter. Your daughter have spoiled my daughter.
My mom was shocked.
J was the one who lied to her parents and went for an adventure ride to meet guys she barely knew.
And somehow, I became a bad person to inform them that she did it rather than waiting for her to be dead in some ditch.
That day I lost respect for her Dad because he couldn’t accept his daughter’s mistake and had the audacity to call my mother and say those awful things.
转折点来了：
她父亲第二天打电话给我母亲。并说了一些类似的话：请叫你女儿离我女儿远点；你女儿带坏了我女儿。
我妈妈很震惊。
J就是那个向父母撒谎，冒险去见她几乎不认识的男人的人。
不知怎的，我变成了一个坏人，要知道是我告诉他们她这么做了，而不是等她死在沟里。
那天，我不再尊重她父亲，因为他不能接受他女儿的错误，竟然厚颜无耻地打电话给我母亲，说了那些可怕的话。
Jeremi Shearon
When my girlfriend and I were leaving the supermarket I spotted a very old woman very visibly struggling to lift her bottles of water to put them in her trunk all by herself.
I said : “Oh, hang on, I’m gonna help her.”
My girlfriend’s response was : “Why? Let her manage what she bought.”
I broke up with my girlfriend the following week, despite having been together for quite some time, because of that. Also despite how unlucky in love I am and how much I would have fought for this relationship, in the past.
But I just couldn’t sleep anymore with someone so nice to me, and so cold to others.
当我和女朋友离开超市时，我看到一个年纪非常大的女人，她很明显地挣扎着要把她的瓶装水拖举起来放进她的行李箱。
我说：“哦，等等，我要帮她。”
我女朋友的回答是：“为什么？让她自己弄就是。”
第二周，尽管在一起已经有一段时间了，此外我在爱情上遭遇诸多不幸，过去我为这段关系付出不少努力，我和女朋友还是分手了。
但是我不能再和一个对我这么好，对别人这么冷淡的人睡觉了。
When my girlfriend and I were leaving the supermarket I spotted a very old woman very visibly struggling to lift her bottles of water to put them in her trunk all by herself.
I said : “Oh, hang on, I’m gonna help her.”
My girlfriend’s response was : “Why? Let her manage what she bought.”
I broke up with my girlfriend the following week, despite having been together for quite some time, because of that. Also despite how unlucky in love I am and how much I would have fought for this relationship, in the past.
But I just couldn’t sleep anymore with someone so nice to me, and so cold to others.
当我和女朋友离开超市时，我看到一个年纪非常大的女人，她很明显地挣扎着要把她的瓶装水拖举起来放进她的行李箱。
我说：“哦，等等，我要帮她。”
我女朋友的回答是：“为什么？让她自己弄就是。”
第二周，尽管在一起已经有一段时间了，此外我在爱情上遭遇诸多不幸，过去我为这段关系付出不少努力，我和女朋友还是分手了。
但是我不能再和一个对我这么好，对别人这么冷淡的人睡觉了。
How deep in selfishness you must be, to genuinely not want to help her.
It was far too symbolic and just opened my eyes to the kind of person I was with.
The shame came in a big wave, and all respect was gone with the tide.
A lot of old people can perfectly take care of themselves. A lot of them are freaking assholes even. That wasn’t the point here.
You can insult me, you can abuse me, you can hit me, time and time again. I’ll still accept you for what you are, the violence, the fear, the rudeness, I will still respect you.
You can do the most despicable things, if you’ve got some higher or deeper reason behind it. It’s alright, we’re humans, capable of the best and the worst.
You've got to have a heart, but that’s the line for me.
如果你真的不想帮助她，那你得是多么自私。
这太有象征意义了，让我看清了和我在一起的是什么样的人。
羞耻感如潮水般袭来，对她所有的尊重都随潮水而去。
很多老人都能很好地照顾自己。他们中的很多人甚至都是混蛋，但这不是重点。
你可以侮辱我，你可以虐待我，你可以一次又一次地打我。我仍然会接受你本来的样子：暴力，恐惧，粗鲁，但我我仍然会尊重你。
如果你有更高或更深层次的理由，你可以做最卑鄙的事情。没关系，我们是人类，能做最好的事就能做最坏的事。
（面对这个行动不便的老年人）你必须有一颗心，但这是我的底线。
It was far too symbolic and just opened my eyes to the kind of person I was with.
The shame came in a big wave, and all respect was gone with the tide.
A lot of old people can perfectly take care of themselves. A lot of them are freaking assholes even. That wasn’t the point here.
You can insult me, you can abuse me, you can hit me, time and time again. I’ll still accept you for what you are, the violence, the fear, the rudeness, I will still respect you.
You can do the most despicable things, if you’ve got some higher or deeper reason behind it. It’s alright, we’re humans, capable of the best and the worst.
You've got to have a heart, but that’s the line for me.
如果你真的不想帮助她，那你得是多么自私。
这太有象征意义了，让我看清了和我在一起的是什么样的人。
羞耻感如潮水般袭来，对她所有的尊重都随潮水而去。
很多老人都能很好地照顾自己。他们中的很多人甚至都是混蛋，但这不是重点。
你可以侮辱我，你可以虐待我，你可以一次又一次地打我。我仍然会接受你本来的样子：暴力，恐惧，粗鲁，但我我仍然会尊重你。
如果你有更高或更深层次的理由，你可以做最卑鄙的事情。没关系，我们是人类，能做最好的事就能做最坏的事。
（面对这个行动不便的老年人）你必须有一颗心，但这是我的底线。
Lisa Newall, lives in New England
A man I was dating during my college years.
When I met him, I couldn’t help but notice how handsome and nice he was. Even-tempered and well-dressed. Impeccable manners. I found out later he was working on his dissertation, which he finished two years later. He had a good job.
We had been dating about four months exclusively and were together all we could be. We decided one weekend to go out for a movie and dinner, a typical Saturday night. We decided to stop by my parents’ house for a visit first.
When we arrived, my mother said, “Tiffany up the street has been calling you. I mean, calling and calling.” This was odd. This was a little girl I used to babysit, who was probably 10 years old now (I stopped babysitting when I went away to college). Her brother was 6. Why would she be calling me? So I called her back.
我大学时代约会的男人。。
当我遇到他时，我不禁注意到他是多么英俊和善良。脾气温和,穿着考究的。无可挑剔的举止。后来我发现他在写论文，两年后才完成。他有一份好工作。
我们已经单独约会了四个月，尽可能地在一起。我们决定在一个周末出去看电影，吃晚饭，这是一个周六晚上。我们决定先去我父母家看看。
当我们到达时，我母亲说，“街上的蒂芙尼一直在给你打电话。我的意思是，连续打。”这很奇怪。这是我曾经照看过的一个小女孩，她现在大概10岁了（我上大学时就不再当保姆了）。她弟弟6岁。她为什么打电话给我？所以我给她回了一个电话。
A man I was dating during my college years.
When I met him, I couldn’t help but notice how handsome and nice he was. Even-tempered and well-dressed. Impeccable manners. I found out later he was working on his dissertation, which he finished two years later. He had a good job.
We had been dating about four months exclusively and were together all we could be. We decided one weekend to go out for a movie and dinner, a typical Saturday night. We decided to stop by my parents’ house for a visit first.
When we arrived, my mother said, “Tiffany up the street has been calling you. I mean, calling and calling.” This was odd. This was a little girl I used to babysit, who was probably 10 years old now (I stopped babysitting when I went away to college). Her brother was 6. Why would she be calling me? So I called her back.
我大学时代约会的男人。。
当我遇到他时，我不禁注意到他是多么英俊和善良。脾气温和,穿着考究的。无可挑剔的举止。后来我发现他在写论文，两年后才完成。他有一份好工作。
我们已经单独约会了四个月，尽可能地在一起。我们决定在一个周末出去看电影，吃晚饭，这是一个周六晚上。我们决定先去我父母家看看。
当我们到达时，我母亲说，“街上的蒂芙尼一直在给你打电话。我的意思是，连续打。”这很奇怪。这是我曾经照看过的一个小女孩，她现在大概10岁了（我上大学时就不再当保姆了）。她弟弟6岁。她为什么打电话给我？所以我给她回了一个电话。
It turned out she was calling me because She was very attached to me and often came down to visit me if she saw my car in my parents’ driveway.
It seems her father had come home for a surprise visit, and he and their mother took off for “dinner”. Both, I knew, were heavy drinkers and dinner meant most likely a binge. Tiffany was terrified because she also knew they wouldn’t be back soon, and the front door lock required a key to get both in and out. (I believe these are illegal now.) Tiffany did not have a key to this door, and the mother left it unlocked in case of a fire or other emergency, she “wanted the kids to be safe” and able to get out. So, they were in a house that couldn’t be locked, dark was rapidly approaching, and they were terrified to be home alone when anyone could walk in. (This was pretty unlikely in my parents’ rural area, but still.) They wanted to know if I could come babysit them.
I walked to their house. Sure enough, the front door was unlocked. I was shocked at what I had found inside.
结果发现她打给我是因为她很喜欢我，如果她看到我的车停在我父母的车道上，就经常下来看我。
她父亲似乎是突然回家的，他和他们的母亲一起去吃“晚餐”。我知道，他们都是酒鬼，晚餐很可能意味着狂欢。蒂芙尼很害怕，因为她也知道他们无法很快回来，前门的锁需要钥匙才能进出。蒂芙尼没有这扇门的钥匙，她的母亲没有锁门，以防发生火灾或其他紧急情况，她“希望孩子们安全”，并且能够出去。所以，他们住在一所没有上锁的房子里，天很快就黑了，他们害怕安妮一个人呆在家里，毕竟任何人都可以进来。（这在我父母的农村地区是不太可能的，但仍然有此担心。）他们想知道我是否能来照顾他们。
我走到他们家。果然，前门没有锁。我对我在里面发现的东西感到震惊。
It seems her father had come home for a surprise visit, and he and their mother took off for “dinner”. Both, I knew, were heavy drinkers and dinner meant most likely a binge. Tiffany was terrified because she also knew they wouldn’t be back soon, and the front door lock required a key to get both in and out. (I believe these are illegal now.) Tiffany did not have a key to this door, and the mother left it unlocked in case of a fire or other emergency, she “wanted the kids to be safe” and able to get out. So, they were in a house that couldn’t be locked, dark was rapidly approaching, and they were terrified to be home alone when anyone could walk in. (This was pretty unlikely in my parents’ rural area, but still.) They wanted to know if I could come babysit them.
I walked to their house. Sure enough, the front door was unlocked. I was shocked at what I had found inside.
结果发现她打给我是因为她很喜欢我，如果她看到我的车停在我父母的车道上，就经常下来看我。
她父亲似乎是突然回家的，他和他们的母亲一起去吃“晚餐”。我知道，他们都是酒鬼，晚餐很可能意味着狂欢。蒂芙尼很害怕，因为她也知道他们无法很快回来，前门的锁需要钥匙才能进出。蒂芙尼没有这扇门的钥匙，她的母亲没有锁门，以防发生火灾或其他紧急情况，她“希望孩子们安全”，并且能够出去。所以，他们住在一所没有上锁的房子里，天很快就黑了，他们害怕安妮一个人呆在家里，毕竟任何人都可以进来。（这在我父母的农村地区是不太可能的，但仍然有此担心。）他们想知道我是否能来照顾他们。
我走到他们家。果然，前门没有锁。我对我在里面发现的东西感到震惊。
In preparation for the move to the state where the husband was stationed, all the furniture had been sold since it was too expensive to ship. There was no furniture anywhere in the house. The children were sleeping on piles of clothes on the floors. There were no tables, chairs, couches, or even floor lamps, so the whole house was being illuminated by one overhead light in the eat-in kitchen, and the bathroom light down the hall.
I opened the refrigerator. There was nothing inside.
These children had been left alone, underaged, with no food, no drinks, and no way to lock the door, in near-darkness. They look at me with huge, panicked eyes.
Before the light faded, I went into their bedrooms and we dug out some pajamas. I told them to come to my house, there were lights and a TV there. They insisted on leaving the parents a note, but there was no paper.
We walked back to my house, and I called and left the parents a message on their answering machine. I also wrote a note and walked back up and taped it on the front door.
I asked them what they had had for dinner, and they said they were not hungry. I figured they were either too scared or too polite to say otherwise. I sat them down and made them, my boyfriend, and my parents hamburgers. They ate as though they had not eaten all day. I served them seconds. I gave them milk and potato chips and fruit for dessert.
I got them sleeping bags and laid them out on the living room floor, saying how much fun we would have, it was like camping! I picked out a children’s movie that appealed to adults as well and loaded it into the TV. I made popcorn.
为了准备搬到丈夫所在的州，所有的家具都被卖掉了，因为运费太贵，无法带过去。房子里没有家具：没有桌子、椅子、沙发，甚至连落地灯都没有，孩子们睡在地板上成堆的衣服上。所以整个房子都被厨房里的一盏顶灯照亮了，而浴室的灯就在大厅下面。
我打开冰箱。里面什么也没有。
这些孩子孤身一人，未成年，没有食物，没有饮料，在近乎黑暗的环境中又无法锁门，他们睁着大眼睛惊恐的看着我。
在光线暗下来之前，我走进他们的卧室，我们拿出了一些睡衣。我告诉他们到我家去，那里有灯光和电视。他们坚持给要父母留张便条，但没有找到纸。
我们走回我家，我打电话给她父母，在他们的录音电话上留言。我还写了一张便条，走了回来，把它贴在前门上。
我问他们晚餐吃了什么，他们说他们不饿。我觉得他们要么太害怕，要么太有礼貌。我让他们坐下来，给他们、我男朋友和我父母做汉堡包。他们好像一整天都没吃东西似的吃着它们。我给他们拿出来牛奶、薯片和水果当甜点。
我给他们拿了睡袋，把它们放在客厅的地板上，说我们像露营一样开心的玩！我挑选了一部同样能吸引成年人的儿童电影，并将其下载入电视，顺便做了爆米花。
I opened the refrigerator. There was nothing inside.
These children had been left alone, underaged, with no food, no drinks, and no way to lock the door, in near-darkness. They look at me with huge, panicked eyes.
Before the light faded, I went into their bedrooms and we dug out some pajamas. I told them to come to my house, there were lights and a TV there. They insisted on leaving the parents a note, but there was no paper.
We walked back to my house, and I called and left the parents a message on their answering machine. I also wrote a note and walked back up and taped it on the front door.
I asked them what they had had for dinner, and they said they were not hungry. I figured they were either too scared or too polite to say otherwise. I sat them down and made them, my boyfriend, and my parents hamburgers. They ate as though they had not eaten all day. I served them seconds. I gave them milk and potato chips and fruit for dessert.
I got them sleeping bags and laid them out on the living room floor, saying how much fun we would have, it was like camping! I picked out a children’s movie that appealed to adults as well and loaded it into the TV. I made popcorn.
为了准备搬到丈夫所在的州，所有的家具都被卖掉了，因为运费太贵，无法带过去。房子里没有家具：没有桌子、椅子、沙发，甚至连落地灯都没有，孩子们睡在地板上成堆的衣服上。所以整个房子都被厨房里的一盏顶灯照亮了，而浴室的灯就在大厅下面。
我打开冰箱。里面什么也没有。
这些孩子孤身一人，未成年，没有食物，没有饮料，在近乎黑暗的环境中又无法锁门，他们睁着大眼睛惊恐的看着我。
在光线暗下来之前，我走进他们的卧室，我们拿出了一些睡衣。我告诉他们到我家去，那里有灯光和电视。他们坚持给要父母留张便条，但没有找到纸。
我们走回我家，我打电话给她父母，在他们的录音电话上留言。我还写了一张便条，走了回来，把它贴在前门上。
我问他们晚餐吃了什么，他们说他们不饿。我觉得他们要么太害怕，要么太有礼貌。我让他们坐下来，给他们、我男朋友和我父母做汉堡包。他们好像一整天都没吃东西似的吃着它们。我给他们拿出来牛奶、薯片和水果当甜点。
我给他们拿了睡袋，把它们放在客厅的地板上，说我们像露营一样开心的玩！我挑选了一部同样能吸引成年人的儿童电影，并将其下载入电视，顺便做了爆米花。
Well, you would think this elegant, intelligent, seemingly sweet man would understand, don’t you? Inside he kept pulling me aside and hissing at me: He didn’t come to babysit two kids he didn’t even know! He wanted an elegant, relaxed meal at a good restaurant, not my parents’ leftovers!
“Look,” I said, “these children I’ve known all their lives. It was me they called when they needed help. You have to understand.” Nope, he got angrier. “The house is abandoned. It’s dark. I would be scared to stay there. There’s no food.” I told him to go if he wanted to. I told him he wanted dinner, he got it, he wanted a movie, he got it, he wanted to spend time with me, he got it.
He told me to call social services and report the parents. They were not bad parents at all as far as I had ever seen. This was a strange scenario. They were not alcoholics, just hard-partying people. This was a tiny town.
He stayed, but he sulked. I told him not to make these children feel unwelcome or that they were a bother to us. I told him they would have preferred a different evening as well. Seriously, who could have been so cold to these dear little kids?
We continued to date because we really liked each other. We remained friends after the breakup, even travelling together. But I lost all respect for him at the way he reacted. I never looked at him as marriage material again after that.
嗯，你会认为这个优雅、聪明、貌似可爱的男人会理解的，不是吗？在里面，他不停地把我拉到一边，对我发出嘘声:他不是来照顾两个他根本不认识的孩子的!他想在一家好餐馆吃一顿优雅、轻松的晚餐，而不是我父母的剩菜!
“听着，”我说，“她们是我看着长大的孩子。当她们需要帮助并打电话给我的。你必须理解。”不，他变得更生气了。“她们被留在房子里，天又黑了，呆在那里我都会害怕，那里还没有食物。”我告诉他如果他想走的话就走。我告诉他他想要晚餐，他得到了，他想要一部电影，他得到了，他想要和我一起度过时光，他得到了。
他让我打电话给社会服务机构举报他的父母。就我所见，他们并不是坏父母。这是一个特殊的场景，他们不是酗酒者，只是喜欢狂欢，况且这是一个小镇。
他留下来，但他生气了。我告诉他不要让这些孩子感到不受欢迎，或者说他们是我们的麻烦。我告诉他，她们也希望有一个不同的晚上。说真的，有谁会对这些可爱的孩子如此冷漠呢？
我们继续约会，因为我们真的很喜欢对方。我们分手后仍然是朋友，甚至一起旅行。但他的反应让我不再尊重他。从那以后，我再也没把他当成结婚的对象
“Look,” I said, “these children I’ve known all their lives. It was me they called when they needed help. You have to understand.” Nope, he got angrier. “The house is abandoned. It’s dark. I would be scared to stay there. There’s no food.” I told him to go if he wanted to. I told him he wanted dinner, he got it, he wanted a movie, he got it, he wanted to spend time with me, he got it.
He told me to call social services and report the parents. They were not bad parents at all as far as I had ever seen. This was a strange scenario. They were not alcoholics, just hard-partying people. This was a tiny town.
He stayed, but he sulked. I told him not to make these children feel unwelcome or that they were a bother to us. I told him they would have preferred a different evening as well. Seriously, who could have been so cold to these dear little kids?
We continued to date because we really liked each other. We remained friends after the breakup, even travelling together. But I lost all respect for him at the way he reacted. I never looked at him as marriage material again after that.
嗯，你会认为这个优雅、聪明、貌似可爱的男人会理解的，不是吗？在里面，他不停地把我拉到一边，对我发出嘘声:他不是来照顾两个他根本不认识的孩子的!他想在一家好餐馆吃一顿优雅、轻松的晚餐，而不是我父母的剩菜!
“听着，”我说，“她们是我看着长大的孩子。当她们需要帮助并打电话给我的。你必须理解。”不，他变得更生气了。“她们被留在房子里，天又黑了，呆在那里我都会害怕，那里还没有食物。”我告诉他如果他想走的话就走。我告诉他他想要晚餐，他得到了，他想要一部电影，他得到了，他想要和我一起度过时光，他得到了。
他让我打电话给社会服务机构举报他的父母。就我所见，他们并不是坏父母。这是一个特殊的场景，他们不是酗酒者，只是喜欢狂欢，况且这是一个小镇。
他留下来，但他生气了。我告诉他不要让这些孩子感到不受欢迎，或者说他们是我们的麻烦。我告诉他，她们也希望有一个不同的晚上。说真的，有谁会对这些可爱的孩子如此冷漠呢？
我们继续约会，因为我们真的很喜欢对方。我们分手后仍然是朋友，甚至一起旅行。但他的反应让我不再尊重他。从那以后，我再也没把他当成结婚的对象
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