我能做些什么来培养坚强的意志(三)
2022-10-16 辽阔天空 3293
正文翻译

What can I do to develop a strong mind?

我能做些什么来培养坚强的意志?

评论翻译
Sean Kernan
How can I better manage my mind?
A few years back, I was waiting to hear back about a job I wanted.
I wanted the job so bad it hurt.
I’d made it to the final round of interviews. It was a high-paying position, with an exciting, interesting list of responsibilities.
It was at a beautiful office. At a fast-growing company.
I’d be working with great, top-tier coworkers: smart, motivated, team oriented with a good attitude.
Two weeks after the third round of interviews, I got the call.
By her tone, I immediately knew the answer before I heard it, “We’ve decided to go with another candidate.”
I was gracious and thanked them for their time.
But when I got off the call,
Totally bummed. “How did I not get this? Everything went so well in those interviews! They seemed to love me!”

我怎样才能更好地控制我的意志?
几年前,我在等我想要得到的工作的回音。
我太想得到这份工作了。
我参加了最后一轮面试。这是一个薪水很高的职位,有一系列令人兴奋、有趣的职责。
那是在一个漂亮的办公室,且是一家快速发展的公司。
我会和优秀的顶级同事一起工作:聪明、积极、以团队为导向、态度良好。
第三轮面试两周后,我接到了电话。
通过她的语气,我在听到之前就知道了答案,“我们决定与另一位候选人合作。”
我很有礼貌,并感谢他们抽出时间。
但我打完电话后,完全不高兴。“我怎么没有得到这个工作?在那些面试中一切都进行得很顺利!他们似乎很喜欢我!”

Years later, at a different fork in the road, I was pining for a different job.
Similar circumstances. Highly competitive job. Lots of great candidates. All of them capable.
I wanted this job. I wanted it bad. It was as exciting as the first one.
I’d made it to a final round of interviews. It was down to two candidates from many. I waited for my call back.
This time around, I said to myself. “OK, Sean. Last time we went through this, you spent a month being bitter.
“Let’s plan right now — if you get the job, great. If you don’t, we’ll take the hit. It will suck. But we aren’t going to dwell on it.”
And sure enough — “You were an impressive candidate, Sean! But we’ve decided to ...”
… you know the rest.

多年后,在另一个岔路口,我渴望得到一份不同的工作。
类似情况且竞争激烈的面试工作。很多优秀的候选人,他们都有能力。
我想要这份工作,我非常想要得到它。这和第一场一样激动人心。
我参加了最后一轮面试—许多候选人中只有两名候选人。我等着回电。
这一次,我对自己说。“好吧,肖恩。上一次我们经历了这件事,你痛苦了一个月。
“让我们现在就计划吧——如果你得到了这份工作,那就太好了。如果你不得到,我们会受到打击。这会很糟糕。但我们不会再纠缠于此。”
果然——“你是一个令人印象深刻的候选人,肖恩!但我们决定……”
其余的你都知道。

The rejection sucked. But this time — I planned and allowed myself space for the rejection. Consequently, it hit with far less impact. And the sting had a far shorter duration.
Bad times are bad times. You can’t positive-think them into oblivion.
Think about a great skier.
He doesn’t go down the ski slopes expecting a flat run. He’s looking ahead of him. Anticipating dips, curves, sheets of ice.
His body is in a loose-but-ready state for unknowns.
Any experienced person who has learned anything from living will tell you this: life is a series of hills.
If you can stay primed for what’s ahead, you’ll be better prepared for the difficult moments in life. They’ll pass quicker and easier.
Managing the good times is the easy part. The hard times are what’ll get ya. Ya gotta be ready for those double black diamonds.

被拒绝是很糟糕的局面。但这一次,我计划好了,给自己留出了拒绝的空间。因此,它的影响要小得多。而刺痛的持续时间要短得多。
糟糕的时候就是糟糕的时候。你不能肯定地认为他们会被遗忘。
想想一个很棒的滑雪者。
他下坡时并不指望能跑得平直。他正在向前看。预计会出现下陷、弯曲、冰层。
他的身体处于一种松散但随时准备迎接未知事物的状态。
任何有经验的人如果从生活中学到了什么,都会告诉你:生活是一系列的小山。
如果你能为未来做好准备,你就可以更好地为生活中的困难时刻做好准备。他们会更快更容易摆脱它们。
管理好时间是很容易的。困难的时刻会让你受益匪浅。你必须准备好迎接那些双黑钻石

Profile photo for Nela Canovic
How can we cultivate a good mindset in life?
First, you need to be open to the idea that you can change your mindset for the better, just like you can change anything about your life if you want to. This is a powerful way to think about life in general because you will feel that it is something you can control instead of it controlling you.
How do you cultivate a mindset that will be beneficial to you?
I’ll give 5 examples.

我们如何在生活中培养良好的心态?
首先,你需要接受这样的想法:你可以改变你的思维方式,让它变得更好,就像你可以改变生活中的任何事情一样。总的来说,这是一种思考生活的有力方式,因为你会觉得生活是你可以控制的,而不是它控制你。
你如何培养对你有益的心态?
我将举5个例子。
原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


#1. Make your mindset all about growth.
I’ll admit it — I am obsessed with the concept of growth mindset. Ever since reading Carol Dweck’s book on this topic, I’ve completely changed my attitude about what the human brain is capable of. It’s a simple yet powerful distinction. There are two types of mindsets, fixed and growth. A fixed mindset is when you believe you’re born with a set of skills and abilities that are part of your DNA and cannot be changed, whereas a growth mindset is when you work on building new skills and habits continually over time.
For the past six years, I’ve used my own life as a growth mindset experiment. It’s taught me a lot. I revamped my professional life and now love the work that I do. I improved my personal life and started appreciating my friendships and partnerships. I also incorporated new habits like running, working out, going on morning walks, having a gratitude practice. And, most important to me, I write every day. Small things, big things, articles, e-books, answers on Quora. Writing keeps me disciplined, focused, and motivated. It makes me feel the most alive!

让你的心态都同步成长。
我承认,我对成长心态的概念着迷。自从读了卡罗尔·德韦克(Carol Dweck)关于这个话题的书之后,我完全改变了我对人脑能力的看法。这是一个简单而有力的区别。有两种心态,固定和成长。固定心态是指你相信自己天生就具有一套技能和能力,这些技能和能力是你DNA的一部分,是无法改变的,而成长心态是指随着时间的推移,你不断努力培养新的技能和习惯。
在过去的六年里,我用自己的生活作为一个成长心态的实验。它教会了我很多。我改变了我的职业生涯,现在我热爱我所做的工作。我改善了我的个人生活,开始欣赏我的友谊和伙伴关系。我还养成了一些新习惯,比如跑步、锻炼、晨练、感恩练习。而且,对我来说最重要的是,我每天都写作。小事情,大事情,文章,电子书,Quora上写答案。写作让我保持自律、专注和积极性。它让我觉得最有活力!

#2. Decide to stop a negative habit if it doesn’t make you feel good.
I’m sure you know where your weaknesses lie. Some people keep smoking, others can’t say no to a friend’s invitation to binge drink at the local bar, and there are many of us who are hooked on eating desserts and chocolate-y treats. The bigger question is not why, but who’s in charge here? If we’re going to be completely honest, the only one in charge is (and always should be) YOU.
So let’s figure out a way to get rid of a bad habit. If you have a nagging feeling that you’re doing something that’s not beneficial to you, step one is to acknowledge there’s a problem. Awareness (instead of stay in denial) will allow you to move on to step two — figuring out what to do about it. Create a plan to attack it in stages. Reduce the amount of junk food you have each week, go to bed 30 minutes earlier than usual, or talk to a friend who has quit smoking and ask how they did it. What’s step three? Keep pushing yourself, stay disciplined every day even if it means you’ll be proactive 5 minutes at a time. I created a workbook on this topic called Train Your Brain to Break Bad Habits; you can check it out here.

如果一个消极的习惯不能让你感觉良好,就决定停止它。
我相信你知道你的弱点在哪里。有些人一直在吸烟,其他人不能拒绝朋友邀请他们在当地酒吧大喝一杯,我们中的许多人都沉迷于甜点和巧克力美食。更大的问题不是为什么,而是谁负责这些行为?如果我们要完全诚实,唯一负责的人就是(而且应该永远是)你。
所以,让我们想出一个摆脱坏习惯的方法。如果你有想唠叨的感觉,觉得自己在做一些对自己没有好处的事情,那么第一步就是承认存在问题。意识(而不是拒绝)会让你进入第二步——弄清楚该怎么办。制定计划,分阶段实施。减少每周垃圾食品的摄入量,比平时提前30分钟上床睡觉,或者和戒烟的朋友谈谈,问问他们是怎么做到的。第三步是什么?继续督促自己,每天保持自律,即使这意味着你每次可以提前5分钟。我创建了一个关于这个主题的工作簿,名为“训练你的大脑以打破坏习惯;你可以在这里查看。

#3. Start something new, even if it’s for 10 minutes a day.
I tried many new things that I wouldn’t have contemplated when I was a college student. Running, for example. I thought it was for people who are extremely athletic and who have extraordinary lung capacity. But I started the Couch to 5k program and eventually ran for 45 minutes to an hour without stopping — and it was enjoyable! Another great example is meditation. I thought it meant you have to sit in complete silence, with eyes closed, for hours. But with my mind being so busy, I couldn’t possibly do it. Then I started a 10-minute guided meditation with the Headspace app, and now it’s one of the best parts of my day.
What can you do that’s new, different, perhaps something you’ve always been curious to try out? Explore what that is for you. Go and do the research. Find an app to track your progress. Talk to someone who’s an expert in that field. Start with baby steps — try the new activity for 10 minutes a day, and add it to your weekly schedule. Push yourself. Experiment with it. Grow.

开始接触一些新事情,即使是每天10分钟。
我尝试了很多在我还是大学生时没有想过的新事物。例如,跑步。我认为这是为那些运动能力极强、肺活量非凡的人设计的。但我开始了从睡沙发到跑5公里的项目,最终不停地跑了45分钟到一个小时——这很愉快!另一个很好的例子是冥想。我想这意味着你必须安静地坐上几个小时,闭上眼睛。但由于我的头脑很忙,我不可能做到这一点。然后,我用Headspace(APP) 应用程序开始了10分钟的引导冥想,现在这是我一天中最美好的时光之一。
你能做什么新事情,不同的,也许是你一直好奇想尝试的事情?探索这对你来说是什么。去做调查吧。查找应用程序以跟踪你的进度。与该领域的专家交谈。从一小步开始——每天尝试10分钟的新活动,并将其添加到每周计划中。推动自己,尝试一下,再扩大行动范围。

#4. Commit to becoming a better version of yourself, starting right now.
Don’t let the phrase “better version of yourself” lead you to believe it’s something abstract. It’s as real as you make it. This means different things to different people. What is better for me is perhaps not interesting to you, and that’s OK. The important part is to figure out what YOU think this better version of you looks like. Start there. Visualize it. Who would this version of you be? Someone with a badass job? An entrepreneur? A PhD in predictive modeling and big data analytics? A martial arts expert? A portrait artist?
Next, be honest with yourself. How bad do you want to become this version of you? If you really are dedicated to it, you’re more likely to achieve it. After that, what will it take to get you there — what’s the recipe? Write down what you’ll need. Research it. Talk to people who will encourage you on your quest and who are also going through something similar; there is tremendous power in sharing goals with others. And then get after it: do something every single day that will get you closer to where you want to be.

从现在开始,致力于成为一个更好的自己。
不要让“更好的自己”这句话让你认为这是一个抽象的概念。你让它变得多真实就有多真实。这对不同的人意味着不同的东西。对我更好的东西你可能不感兴趣,这没关系。重要的是弄清楚你认为更好的自己是什么样的。从这里开始,将其可视化。这个版本的你会是谁?有份好工作?一个企业家?预测建模和大数据分析的博士学位?一个武术专家?一位肖像画家吗?
其次,对自己诚实。你有多想成为这样的自己?如果你真的致力于成为她,你更有可能实现这一目的,之后,你需要做什么才能到达那个目标?步骤是什么?写下你需要什么。研究一下,与那些会鼓励你去追求的人交谈,也与那些正在经历类似事情的人交谈;与他人分享目标会带来巨大的力量。然后去追求它:每天都做一些能让你更接近你那个目标事情。

#5. Focus on what you have, instead of giving in to FOMO.
FOMO — the “fear of missing out”— is a real struggle for many people. We are social creatures, so it’s no surprise that we look to one another to see how we stack against people in our social circle. This is nothing new. But with smartphones and social media taking over our daily life, our social circle no longer includes just our family, friends, classmates, co-workers, and neighbors. We are part of a global community and that means we compare ourselves with everyone who has a Twitter, Tik Tok, or Instagram account. It’s a big world out there!
The downside to all this? By witnessing the lives of others that seem super interesting, we become increasingly frustrated with our own. We see only what we don’t have, where we aren’t traveling, what we haven’t achieved, how much money isn’t in our bank account. So how to change this point of view? A simple way is to incorporate a 5-minute gratitude practice into your day. Write down 3 things (they can also be people, experiences, and even pets) you are grateful for having in your life right now. Turn it into a small daily ritual that can change how you think about life in general — in more positive ways that will benefit you.

专注于你所拥有的,而不是屈服于错失恐惧症(FOMO)。
FOMO——“害怕错过”——对许多人来说是一场真正的斗争。我们是社会动物,所以我们相互关注,看看我们在社交圈中如何与人对抗,这并不奇怪。这不是什么新鲜事。但随着智能手机和社交媒体接管我们的日常生活,我们的社交圈不再仅仅包括我们的家人、朋友、同学、同事和邻居。我们是全球社区的一部分,这意味着我们将自己与每个拥有Twitter、Tik Tok或Instagram帐户的人进行比较,外面的世界真大!
这一切的坏处是什么?看到别人的生活似乎非常有趣,我们对自己的生活越来越失望。我们只看到我们没有的,我们没有旅行过的地方,我们没有取得的成就,有多少钱还没有进入我们的银行账户中。那么如何改变这种观点呢?一个简单的方法是在你的一天中加入5分钟的感恩练习。写下3件事(它们也可以是人、经历,甚至宠物),你现在很感激在你的生活中所拥有的。把它变成一个小小的日常仪式,可以以更积极的方式改变你对生活的总体看法,这将对你有益。

Janet Fitch
How can people develop their creativity?
To develop creativity is to find the place of curiosity in yourself again, the curiousity you had a child, that sense of play and wonder. Creativity doesn’t mean just to paint a painting or compose music or write a story. Creativity is a way of living in the world, open to new ideas, actively seeking out a new experiences, of finding something that excites you, rather than looking for comfort, which is usually about fear, about protecting yourself from pain by repeating things that worked in the past.
Creativity is about play. It requires you to take what you’re doing somewhat less seriously in one respect, but with the absolute absorption and belief of a child playing.
One thing that for me always freshens my vision is to go for a walk in search of the Miraculous. This was a surrealist’s game, to ‘defamiliarize’ the world—make it new again. When you’re on the lookout for the Miraculous, you’re open to whatever interesting obxt or happening comes your way. Something you would normally have walked right past is suddenly an obxt of wonder, of magic, the universe speaking directly to you. You can’t plan for it, you have to surrender to the action.
Creativity’s like that, a surrender to openness and the weird and haphazard. You give it your time, you make space for it, and then you set up a game or a some sort of random prompt—in writing I sometimes use a word, or an obxt, and allow things to arise form the unconscious. You can’t plan creativity but you can prepare for it by exposing yourself to a wide range of experiences, especially to other people’s creativity.
Take things that are unrelated and try to see how they go together. Dance a dream. Describe a painting in words. There’s a wonderful book I recommend, Stephen Nachmanovitch’s Free Play, about improvisation, that always makes me want to create something. Patti Smith’s Just Kids is a portrait of the spontaneous joy of creative life. The Art Spirit by Robert Henri, an artist, captures the inner state which then produces the outer work.

人们如何发展创造力?
培养创造力就是重新找到自己的好奇心所在,找回自己对孩子的好奇,找回玩耍和好奇的感觉。创造力不仅仅意味着绘画、作曲或写故事。创造力是一种生活在这个世界上的方式,对新的想法持开放态度,积极寻求新的体验,寻找让你兴奋的东西,而不是寻求安慰,通常是关于恐惧,关于通过重复过去有效的事情来保护自己免受痛苦。
创造力是关于游戏的。它要求你在某一方面不太认真地对待你正在做的事情,但要有孩子玩耍时的全神贯注那种状态和信念。
对我来说,有一件事总能让我的视野焕然一新,那就是去散步,寻找奇迹。这是一个超现实主义者的游戏,让世界“陌生化”,让它再次焕然一新。当你在寻找奇迹时,你对任何有趣的事物或发生在你面前的事情都持开放态度。一些你通常会路过的东西突然变成了一个神奇的物体,充满魔力,整个宇宙都在直接对你说话。你不能计划它,你必须屈服于行动。
创造力就是这样,向开放、怪异和随意投降。你给它你的时间,你为它腾出空间,然后你设置一个游戏或某种随机的写作提示,我有时会用一个词或一个物体,让事物从无意识中产生。你不能计划创造力,但你可以通过让自己接触广泛的经历,尤其是接触其他人的创造力,为之做好准备。
拿不相关的东西,试着看看它们是如何结合在一起的。为梦跳支舞,用语言描述一幅画。我推荐了一本关于即兴创作的好书,史蒂芬·纳奇马诺维奇的《自由发挥》,它总是让我想创造一些东西。帕蒂·史密斯(Patti Smith)的《独生子女》(Just Kids)是创作生活中自发的快乐的写照。艺术家罗伯特·亨利(Robert Henri)的《艺术精神》(Art Spirit)抓住了产生外在作品的内在状态。

Josh Fechter
How do I develop razor-sharp focus?
I read 170 business books in a year.
After the tenth book, I became an addict.
My entire routine was built around reading.
I’d wake up at 5 a.m., then read for three hours before work.
Ten minute lunch break?
I’d read.
Two hours before I’d go to sleep?
I’d read.
I couldn’t stop.
I skipped events with friends, family, and even the gym.
All I could think about is one more page.
Razor-sharp focus.

如何培养剃须刀般锐利的专注力?
我一年读了170本商业书籍。
读完第十本书后,我成了一个对读书上瘾的人。
我的整个日常生活都是围绕着阅读。
我早上5点起床,然后在上班前阅读三个小时。
十分钟的午休时间?
我会读书。
在我睡觉前两个小时?
我会读书。
我停不下来。
我跳过了与朋友、家人甚至健身房的活动。
我所能想到的就是再多读一页。
剃须刀般锐利的专注力。

It got darker -
When I wasn’t reading, I got anxious.
It’s like I was a homeless addict and a drug had been taken away from me.
What I realized -
I had built reading into my routine.
After the second week of reading five hours every day, no longer did it feel like a chore. My body and mind were adjusted. It craved more of it.
What I learned is that sharp focus is built on addiction.
You know you’re addicted when you have a compulsive feeling to do something.
It’s not a bad feeling.

天越来越黑了-
当我不读书时,我很焦虑。
就像我是一个无家可归的瘾君子—好似一种毒品被拿走了。
我意识到的-
我把阅读融入了我的日常生活。
在每天阅读五个小时的第二周之后,不再觉得这是一件烦人的事情。我的身心都得到了调整,它渴望阅读更多书籍。
我学到的是,敏锐的注意力是建立在沉迷上的。
当你有做某事的冲动时,你就知道自己上瘾了。
这感觉不错。

It’s what keeps a NBA player motivated to train every morning at 5 a.m.
A physicist solving some of the most complex math equations.
A doctor working 18 hrs. a day to care for their patients.
Most of us have this feeling many times a day.
I need to close another sales deal.
I need to eat another candy bar.
I need another cup of coffee.
I need to surf today.
We all have addictions because we all have routines.
And routines foster addiction - the core element of razor-sharp focus.

这是NBA球员每天早上5点训练的动力所在。
一个物理学家正在解决一些最复杂的数学方程
一名医生每天工作18小时去照顾病人。
我们大多数人每天都会有这种感觉。
我需要完成另一笔销售订单。
我需要再吃一块糖果。
我还需要一杯咖啡。
我今天需要上网。
我们都会上瘾,因为我们都有惯例。
日常生活会助长上瘾,这是集中专注力的核心要素。

Sean Lana
What are the best ways to improve your personality?
Anytime you are meeting a group of people for the first time, introduce yourself by telling them your name with soft eye contact and smile.
Invest in your own personal hygiene like flossing your teeth, clean your mouth, wear cologne.
The quality of your cloth does not really matter, but make sure they are always clean, proper combination and well ironed.
If you must gossip about other people, let it be positive, e.g. Mr. Mark is such a hardworking person and he is contributing positively to this organization. When such gossips get to Mr. Mark, he will like you more.
Keep promises. If you promise to do something for someone, make sure you do it. People love reliable people.
If you must give feedback, make sure you keep to the rules of what, where and who.
Show respect for other person’s opinion.
Admit it anytime you receive a constructive criticism. Nobody is above mistake.
Always keep an attentive posture, lean forward slightly and let the other person do the talking.
Avoid spreading discouragement, encourage people and teach them what you know and they don’t.

改善你个性的最佳方法是什么?
每当你第一次与一群人见面时,用温柔的眼神交流和微笑着告诉他们你的名字来介绍自己。
投资于你自己的个人卫生,比如用牙线剔牙、清洁口腔、喷古龙水。
布料的质量并不重要,但要确保它们总是干净的,正确的穿戴和熨烫。
如果你一定要说别人的闲话,那就说积极的一面,例如马克先生是一个工作很努力的人,他对这个组织做出了积极的贡献。当这类话语传到马克先生那里时,他会更喜欢你的。
信守承诺。如果你答应为某人做某事,一定要做到。人们喜欢可靠的人。
如果你一定要给出反馈,一定要遵守反馈内容、反馈地点和反馈对象的规则。
尊重他人的意见。
当你收到建设性的批评时就承认吧。没有人能避免错误。
始终保持专注的姿势,微微前倾,让对方说话。
避免传播沮丧情绪,鼓励人们,教给他们你知道的和他们不知道的。

Ken Ewell
How can I become a man of deep thinking?
Reject your ego. If you are not or cannot be humble with regard to what you know or who you are (personally), you will find your way obstructed.
Reject what you think you know. All that is part of your preferences and opinions, or someone else's. Learn the difference between Planck knowledge and chauffeurs knowledge and take note of which is which. This is necessary for you to begin to think for yourself. Next examine your habits one by one; discard all those that inhibit your freedom of thought and your capacity to remain even minded; particularly those that stroke your ego or incite your passions.

我怎样才能成为一个思考深刻的人?
拒绝你的自我。如果你对你所知道的或你是谁(个人)做不到谦卑,你会发现你的道路受到阻碍。
拒绝你认为你知道的。所有这些都是你或其他人的偏好和观点的一部分。了解 普朗克(德国物理学家)知识和司机知识的区别,并记下哪一个知识是属于谁那的。这对你开始独立思考是必要的。然后逐个检查你的习惯;抛弃所有阻碍你思想自由和保持头脑冷静能力的因素;尤其是那些触动你的自尊或激起你情绪的人。

原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


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