不庆祝生日的 7 个理由（下）
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AmyRose
As a younger version of myself, I used to enjoy my birthday and celebrating it. Now? Not really. I’ve had so many disappointments over the years and then through in the fact I get the blues after the day is over. I prefer a quiet day, without a fuss. Too many of those I had Loved are no longer here who used to celebrate my birthday so when my birthday does come around I feel especially sad and really missing them. I also try very hard not to focus on the number associated with my age. I honestly cannot believe how old I am! I totally enjoyed your post, Mabel.
年轻的时候，我曾经享受我的生日庆祝活动。现在?不怎么喜欢了。这些年来，我经历了太多的失望，每天结束后，我都会感到沮丧。我更喜欢安静的日子，没有人吵闹。太多我曾经爱过的人已经不在了，他们曾经为我庆祝生日，所以当我的生日来临的时候，我感到特别难过，真的很想念他们。我也非常努力地不去关注与我年龄相关的数字。我真的不敢相信我有多大了!梅布尔，我非常喜欢你的帖子。
As a younger version of myself, I used to enjoy my birthday and celebrating it. Now? Not really. I’ve had so many disappointments over the years and then through in the fact I get the blues after the day is over. I prefer a quiet day, without a fuss. Too many of those I had Loved are no longer here who used to celebrate my birthday so when my birthday does come around I feel especially sad and really missing them. I also try very hard not to focus on the number associated with my age. I honestly cannot believe how old I am! I totally enjoyed your post, Mabel.
年轻的时候，我曾经享受我的生日庆祝活动。现在?不怎么喜欢了。这些年来，我经历了太多的失望，每天结束后，我都会感到沮丧。我更喜欢安静的日子，没有人吵闹。太多我曾经爱过的人已经不在了，他们曾经为我庆祝生日，所以当我的生日来临的时候，我感到特别难过，真的很想念他们。我也非常努力地不去关注与我年龄相关的数字。我真的不敢相信我有多大了!梅布尔，我非常喜欢你的帖子。
Mabel Kwong
I am sorry to hear that your recent birthdays were disappointing. Those who are no longer here would probably be silently watching over you on your birthday, and a quiet day and birthday can be a meaningful.
听说你最近的生日过得令人失望，我很难过。那些已经不在这里的人可能会在你生日的时候默默地看着你，一个安静的生日也可以是有意义的。
I am sorry to hear that your recent birthdays were disappointing. Those who are no longer here would probably be silently watching over you on your birthday, and a quiet day and birthday can be a meaningful.
听说你最近的生日过得令人失望，我很难过。那些已经不在这里的人可能会在你生日的时候默默地看着你，一个安静的生日也可以是有意义的。
TheresaBarker
My favorite: #7, recognizing that life is more than just the single day. I usually think of this in relation to those very expensive wedding events, the $10,000 (or more) wedding. The wedding day is exciting, to be sure, but then there’s all the Rest of One’s Life that you are building with the other person. Your mention of having a birthday that falls on a public holiday reminds me of my own situation, in which my mom and I share a birthday. And, it’s one month before the Christmas holiday, so the date gets somewhat overshadowed. I always thought it was kind of a nice thing that I was born on my mom’s birthday, and I also didn’t feel resentful or anything that I didn’t get my “own” birthday. But my sister, whose birthday is in August, told me recently she wished she’d had the birthday shared with my mom, that she’d liked to have felt that strong connection by birthday.
我最喜欢的是:第7点，认识到生活中还有很多更重要的事。我通常会想到那些非常昂贵的婚礼活动，花费1万美元(或更多)的婚礼。当然，婚礼那天是令人兴奋的，但接下来你要和另一个人一起度过余生。你提到生日是在公共假日，这让我想起了我自己的情况，我妈妈和我在同一天过生日。而且这一天离圣诞节还有一个月，所以这个日子有点被蒙上了阴影。我一直认为我出生在我妈妈的生日那天是一件很好的事情，我也没有因为我没有得到“自己”的生日而感到怨恨或其他什么。但我妹妹的生日在8月，她最近告诉我，她希望她能和我妈妈一起过生日，她希望在过生日时能感受到那种强烈的联系。
My favorite: #7, recognizing that life is more than just the single day. I usually think of this in relation to those very expensive wedding events, the $10,000 (or more) wedding. The wedding day is exciting, to be sure, but then there’s all the Rest of One’s Life that you are building with the other person. Your mention of having a birthday that falls on a public holiday reminds me of my own situation, in which my mom and I share a birthday. And, it’s one month before the Christmas holiday, so the date gets somewhat overshadowed. I always thought it was kind of a nice thing that I was born on my mom’s birthday, and I also didn’t feel resentful or anything that I didn’t get my “own” birthday. But my sister, whose birthday is in August, told me recently she wished she’d had the birthday shared with my mom, that she’d liked to have felt that strong connection by birthday.
我最喜欢的是:第7点，认识到生活中还有很多更重要的事。我通常会想到那些非常昂贵的婚礼活动，花费1万美元(或更多)的婚礼。当然，婚礼那天是令人兴奋的，但接下来你要和另一个人一起度过余生。你提到生日是在公共假日，这让我想起了我自己的情况，我妈妈和我在同一天过生日。而且这一天离圣诞节还有一个月，所以这个日子有点被蒙上了阴影。我一直认为我出生在我妈妈的生日那天是一件很好的事情，我也没有因为我没有得到“自己”的生日而感到怨恨或其他什么。但我妹妹的生日在8月，她最近告诉我，她希望她能和我妈妈一起过生日，她希望在过生日时能感受到那种强烈的联系。
Mabel Kwong
It can be unusual to not celebrate a birthday because by celebrating, it’s an opportunity to have fun and probably do something out of the ordinary. But that can be any day but most days we are caught up in the routine…
Not every day you hear someone who shares the same birthday as their mum. It must be double the celebration if your friends and family celebrate the birthdays together…maybe two cakes at a time too
不庆祝生日是很不寻常的，因为通过庆祝，这是一个享受乐趣的机会，可能会发生一些不寻常的事情。这其实也可能发生在其它任何一天，但大多数时候我们都只是敷衍了事……你不会经常能听到有人和他们的妈妈在同一天过生日。如果你的朋友和家人一起庆祝生日，那一定是双倍的快乐……也许还可以一次吃两个蛋糕。
It can be unusual to not celebrate a birthday because by celebrating, it’s an opportunity to have fun and probably do something out of the ordinary. But that can be any day but most days we are caught up in the routine…
Not every day you hear someone who shares the same birthday as their mum. It must be double the celebration if your friends and family celebrate the birthdays together…maybe two cakes at a time too
不庆祝生日是很不寻常的，因为通过庆祝，这是一个享受乐趣的机会，可能会发生一些不寻常的事情。这其实也可能发生在其它任何一天，但大多数时候我们都只是敷衍了事……你不会经常能听到有人和他们的妈妈在同一天过生日。如果你的朋友和家人一起庆祝生日，那一定是双倍的快乐……也许还可以一次吃两个蛋糕。
anotherday2paradise
I also don’t like a fuss on my birthday, but it’s nice just to go out for lunch or dinner with my beloved hubby. If more family happen to be around, it can also be very enjoyable. This year, I’ll be in Johannesburg with our daughter for my birthday. She’s really excited about that and has booked dinner and a show, so I’ll be very spoilt.
我也不喜欢在我的生日那天小题大做，只是和我亲爱的丈夫出去吃午餐或晚餐就很好了。如果碰巧有更多的家人在身边，我也会非常愉快。今年，我将在约翰内斯堡和我们的女儿一起过生日。她对此非常兴奋，还订了晚餐和演出，所以我会很高兴的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I also don’t like a fuss on my birthday, but it’s nice just to go out for lunch or dinner with my beloved hubby. If more family happen to be around, it can also be very enjoyable. This year, I’ll be in Johannesburg with our daughter for my birthday. She’s really excited about that and has booked dinner and a show, so I’ll be very spoilt.
我也不喜欢在我的生日那天小题大做，只是和我亲爱的丈夫出去吃午餐或晚餐就很好了。如果碰巧有更多的家人在身边，我也会非常愉快。今年，我将在约翰内斯堡和我们的女儿一起过生日。她对此非常兴奋，还订了晚餐和演出，所以我会很高兴的。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Mabel Kwong
It does sound like you will be very spoilt for your upcoming birthday, Sylvia. I think we all like to be spoilt Hope it will be one to remember. Enjoy the food and show, and above all have a lot of fun
听起来你一定会在即将到来的生日被宠坏的，西尔维亚。我想我们都喜欢被宠坏，希望这将是一个难忘的回忆。享受美食和表演，最重要的是有很多乐趣
It does sound like you will be very spoilt for your upcoming birthday, Sylvia. I think we all like to be spoilt Hope it will be one to remember. Enjoy the food and show, and above all have a lot of fun
听起来你一定会在即将到来的生日被宠坏的，西尔维亚。我想我们都喜欢被宠坏，希望这将是一个难忘的回忆。享受美食和表演，最重要的是有很多乐趣
Constance
My birthday is on Valentine’s Day and even if I wanted to keep it low key, everyone remembers (and I mean everybody).
We celebrated my son’s birthday in a big way past year, but only with close friends and family. It was his first birthday and we wanted to make it special. Also, he proved to be a fighter on the day he was born when his heart rate dropped rapidly at birth and the doctors and nurses had to perform CPR for 7-8 min to revive him. And for that reason, it is quite the celebration of life and it is worth rejoicing. We will continue to make a big deal of his birthday because that is what parents do (and I don’t mean spending lots of money, I mean celebrating).
我的生日是情人节，即使我想低调一点，但每个人都记得(我是说每个人)。去年，我们隆重庆祝了儿子的生日，但仅限于亲密的朋友和家人。这是他的第一个生日，我们想让它特别一点。在他出生的那一天，他的心率急剧下降，医生和护士对他进行了7-8分钟的心肺复苏，才使他苏醒过来。正因为如此，这是生命的庆典，是值得庆祝的。我们会继续在他的生日上大肆庆祝，因为这是为人父母所该做的事(我不是说要花很多钱，我是说庆祝的热烈程度)。
My birthday is on Valentine’s Day and even if I wanted to keep it low key, everyone remembers (and I mean everybody).
We celebrated my son’s birthday in a big way past year, but only with close friends and family. It was his first birthday and we wanted to make it special. Also, he proved to be a fighter on the day he was born when his heart rate dropped rapidly at birth and the doctors and nurses had to perform CPR for 7-8 min to revive him. And for that reason, it is quite the celebration of life and it is worth rejoicing. We will continue to make a big deal of his birthday because that is what parents do (and I don’t mean spending lots of money, I mean celebrating).
我的生日是情人节，即使我想低调一点，但每个人都记得(我是说每个人)。去年，我们隆重庆祝了儿子的生日，但仅限于亲密的朋友和家人。这是他的第一个生日，我们想让它特别一点。在他出生的那一天，他的心率急剧下降，医生和护士对他进行了7-8分钟的心肺复苏，才使他苏醒过来。正因为如此，这是生命的庆典，是值得庆祝的。我们会继续在他的生日上大肆庆祝，因为这是为人父母所该做的事(我不是说要花很多钱，我是说庆祝的热烈程度)。
Mabel Kwong
That is amazing a lot of people reminder your birthday and that it’s on Valentine’s Day. Maybe when he grows up he will remember all these celebrations but more importantly, these moments with you and the family
很多人提醒你的生日是情人节，这真是太神奇了。也许当你的儿子长大后，他会记得所有这些庆祝活动，但更重要的是，这些与你和家人共处的时刻。
That is amazing a lot of people reminder your birthday and that it’s on Valentine’s Day. Maybe when he grows up he will remember all these celebrations but more importantly, these moments with you and the family
很多人提醒你的生日是情人节，这真是太神奇了。也许当你的儿子长大后，他会记得所有这些庆祝活动，但更重要的是，这些与你和家人共处的时刻。
Stefan
I loved this post. Though I like to celebrate it, I don’t enjoy big celebrations. Birthdays to me, is a day to reflect upon life and myself a few questions, maybe over a small meal at my favourite restaurant. I love to celebrate it that way. This way I go into the next day rejuvenated.
我喜欢这个帖子。虽然我喜欢庆祝，但我不喜欢盛大的庆祝活动。生日对我来说，是一个反思生活和自我的日子，也许也是在我最喜欢的餐厅吃顿饭的时候。我喜欢这样庆祝。这样我就能充满活力地迎接新的一天。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I loved this post. Though I like to celebrate it, I don’t enjoy big celebrations. Birthdays to me, is a day to reflect upon life and myself a few questions, maybe over a small meal at my favourite restaurant. I love to celebrate it that way. This way I go into the next day rejuvenated.
我喜欢这个帖子。虽然我喜欢庆祝，但我不喜欢盛大的庆祝活动。生日对我来说，是一个反思生活和自我的日子，也许也是在我最喜欢的餐厅吃顿饭的时候。我喜欢这样庆祝。这样我就能充满活力地迎接新的一天。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
idiotwithcamera
Personally, I find it disingenuous that people should only decide to be nice to a person just because it’s their birthday; we should aspire to be nice to people all the time.
就我个人而言，我觉得人们仅仅因为今天是一个人的生日就决定对他好是不真诚的;我们应该始终与人为善。
Personally, I find it disingenuous that people should only decide to be nice to a person just because it’s their birthday; we should aspire to be nice to people all the time.
就我个人而言，我觉得人们仅仅因为今天是一个人的生日就决定对他好是不真诚的;我们应该始终与人为善。
Mabel Kwong
You said it. We should be nice to people all the time. No excuses, and that will make the world a better place.
你说的对。我们应该一直对人友善。不要找借口，这样世界才会更美好。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
You said it. We should be nice to people all the time. No excuses, and that will make the world a better place.
你说的对。我们应该一直对人友善。不要找借口，这样世界才会更美好。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
litadoolan
I’m glad to read this post. I always thought it was just me!! I relate to a lot of the reasons you say here that quite honestly it can be expensive to set out a big celebration and sometimes it isn’t what I personally want to do! Also, I’m more keen on treating my self to small things on a daily. ‘Your day can be celebrated any day.’ I love your wisdom. It’s a good call you make saying that psychologists have found the idea of pre planned happiness as not being particularly healthy!
我很高兴能读到这篇文章。我一直以为只有我一个人是这样想的!!我理解你在这里说的很多原因，老实说，举办一场盛大的庆祝活动可能会很昂贵，有时这不是我个人想做的!此外，我更热衷于每天用小东西犒劳自己。“你的日子可以在任何一天庆祝。“我喜欢你的智慧。你说的很好，心理学家发现预先计划好的幸福不是特别健康!
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I’m glad to read this post. I always thought it was just me!! I relate to a lot of the reasons you say here that quite honestly it can be expensive to set out a big celebration and sometimes it isn’t what I personally want to do! Also, I’m more keen on treating my self to small things on a daily. ‘Your day can be celebrated any day.’ I love your wisdom. It’s a good call you make saying that psychologists have found the idea of pre planned happiness as not being particularly healthy!
我很高兴能读到这篇文章。我一直以为只有我一个人是这样想的!!我理解你在这里说的很多原因，老实说，举办一场盛大的庆祝活动可能会很昂贵，有时这不是我个人想做的!此外，我更热衷于每天用小东西犒劳自己。“你的日子可以在任何一天庆祝。“我喜欢你的智慧。你说的很好，心理学家发现预先计划好的幸福不是特别健康!
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Mabel Kwong
Treating yourself to small things every day can be such a lovely thing. In a way you make yourself special and important
每天用一些小东西犒劳自己是一件多么可爱的事情。在某种程度上，你让自己变得更加特别和重要了。
Treating yourself to small things every day can be such a lovely thing. In a way you make yourself special and important
每天用一些小东西犒劳自己是一件多么可爱的事情。在某种程度上，你让自己变得更加特别和重要了。
Imelda
It makes me nervous to be the center of attention and parties are not my thing. Simple greetings (and a family dinner, now that I have my own family) from loved ones and good friends are good enough for me.
成为关注的焦点让我很紧张，聚会不是我的菜。来自爱人和好朋友的简单问候(以及家庭晚餐，现在我有了自己的家庭)对我来说就足够了。
It makes me nervous to be the center of attention and parties are not my thing. Simple greetings (and a family dinner, now that I have my own family) from loved ones and good friends are good enough for me.
成为关注的焦点让我很紧张，聚会不是我的菜。来自爱人和好朋友的简单问候(以及家庭晚餐，现在我有了自己的家庭)对我来说就足够了。
Mabel Kwong
Quiet and simple is always something to be appreciated. Glad you appreciate the quiet moments, Imelda. Many more quiet ‘parties’ for you
安静和简单总是值得欣赏的。很高兴你喜欢安静的时刻，伊梅尔达。为自己打造更多安静的“派对”。
Quiet and simple is always something to be appreciated. Glad you appreciate the quiet moments, Imelda. Many more quiet ‘parties’ for you
安静和简单总是值得欣赏的。很高兴你喜欢安静的时刻，伊梅尔达。为自己打造更多安静的“派对”。
Nihar Pradhan
I agree birthday have are important but over years we have attached meaning to this occasions and the occasions have acquired wings and have manifested in multiple ways…some of these we like but many we may not like, as rightly pointed out it is so much with our personality and the person we are…any of us are private person and we don’t like the big public announcement and celebration which invariably makes a statement, how big is the event and who all attended the celebration and how much better it was than the previous year and the publicity takes over the privacy that is so much a essential aspects of any birthday celebrations. Though it is good to get connected with as many people and check the durability and reliability of friendship and relationship, as if it is a litmus test for the relationship to prove whether they have the strength to stand the test of time.
我同意生日很重要，但多年来，我们给它赋予了意义，它已经有了翅膀，可以以多种方式表现出来，其中一些我们喜欢，但许多我们可能不喜欢，正如你正确指出的那样，这与我们的个性和我们是谁有关，我们都是我们自己，我们不喜欢大型的公开庆祝活动，举办这些活动的人总是想表明活动有多大，所有人都参加了庆祝活动，比前一年好了多少，这是所有生日庆祝活动的重要指标。虽然与尽可能多的人联系是件好事，可以检验友谊和关系的持久性和可靠性，是一段关系的试金石，可以证明他们是否能经得起时间的考验，但公众的注意力取代了隐私。
I agree birthday have are important but over years we have attached meaning to this occasions and the occasions have acquired wings and have manifested in multiple ways…some of these we like but many we may not like, as rightly pointed out it is so much with our personality and the person we are…any of us are private person and we don’t like the big public announcement and celebration which invariably makes a statement, how big is the event and who all attended the celebration and how much better it was than the previous year and the publicity takes over the privacy that is so much a essential aspects of any birthday celebrations. Though it is good to get connected with as many people and check the durability and reliability of friendship and relationship, as if it is a litmus test for the relationship to prove whether they have the strength to stand the test of time.
我同意生日很重要，但多年来，我们给它赋予了意义，它已经有了翅膀，可以以多种方式表现出来，其中一些我们喜欢，但许多我们可能不喜欢，正如你正确指出的那样，这与我们的个性和我们是谁有关，我们都是我们自己，我们不喜欢大型的公开庆祝活动，举办这些活动的人总是想表明活动有多大，所有人都参加了庆祝活动，比前一年好了多少，这是所有生日庆祝活动的重要指标。虽然与尽可能多的人联系是件好事，可以检验友谊和关系的持久性和可靠性，是一段关系的试金石，可以证明他们是否能经得起时间的考验，但公众的注意力取代了隐私。
I agree with social media it has become a public notification and you don’t know where all you have left the days on and it get flashed like a lightening speed all across the digital landscape and then you are overwhelmed and many times get lost in the wilderness of such clicks which many are forced to do as others have done and they don’t want to be left behind as they just do the wishes mechanically rather than any emotions attached. I also like the birthday to be private and limited and the best celebration is when I get to spend time with self and nobody to remind that I have grown older and one more year has passed by and nothing that I can do to arrest the passage of time in life. A day to reflect and muse the philosophy of life…
我同意社交媒体已经成为一个公共通知，你不知道你把所有的时间都留在了哪里，它像闪电一样在整个数字世界中闪现，然后你被淹没了，很多时候迷失在这种点击的机械动作中。许多人被迫这样做，因为其他人已经做了，他们不想被落在后面，因此他们只是在机械的点击而不带什么情绪。我也喜欢生日是私人的和有限的庆祝，最好的庆祝是当我自己独处的时候，没有人提醒我已经变老了，又一年过去了，我无法阻止生命中时间的流逝。这是反思和思考人生哲学的一天……
我同意社交媒体已经成为一个公共通知，你不知道你把所有的时间都留在了哪里，它像闪电一样在整个数字世界中闪现，然后你被淹没了，很多时候迷失在这种点击的机械动作中。许多人被迫这样做，因为其他人已经做了，他们不想被落在后面，因此他们只是在机械的点击而不带什么情绪。我也喜欢生日是私人的和有限的庆祝，最好的庆祝是当我自己独处的时候，没有人提醒我已经变老了，又一年过去了，我无法阻止生命中时间的流逝。这是反思和思考人生哲学的一天……
That’s the reality of life, we try to discover some solace by making that day count designing the celebrations around that special day. There are these good enough reasons as have been so craftily highlighted as including the aspect of spending extravagantly rather than using that money for a good cause which could be of our choice like donating to an orphanage or supporting a needy one or promoting any cause of our interest…these all goes a long way to build a saga in our life that connects the years of our birthday that comes year after year and we either go with the motion or make all these days adds up to make a much more meaningful story in our life the years to come…
这就是生活的现实，我们试图通过让这一天有意义来找到一些安慰，围绕着这一天设计庆祝活动。有这些足够好的理由，我们就可以狡猾地强调生日庆祝活动包括奢侈消费的方面，而不需要将这些钱用于一个好的事业。我们其实可以选择像捐赠孤儿院或帮助一个有需要的人或促进任何我们感兴趣的事业……这些都是需要我们在生活中花很长一段时间需要构建的。连接的生日,年复一年,我们要么随波逐流，要么就使所有这些日子加起来，使我们的生活在未来几年变得更有意义……
这就是生活的现实，我们试图通过让这一天有意义来找到一些安慰，围绕着这一天设计庆祝活动。有这些足够好的理由，我们就可以狡猾地强调生日庆祝活动包括奢侈消费的方面，而不需要将这些钱用于一个好的事业。我们其实可以选择像捐赠孤儿院或帮助一个有需要的人或促进任何我们感兴趣的事业……这些都是需要我们在生活中花很长一段时间需要构建的。连接的生日,年复一年,我们要么随波逐流，要么就使所有这些日子加起来，使我们的生活在未来几年变得更有意义……
Mabel Kwong
It was a quiet birthday this year, Nihar. Just the way I like it. So true that over the years we have attached meaning to occasions. Publicity takes over privacy…I like how you say it. Sometimes we feel like we have no control when we’re at a big party, be it our party or a party we go to. It is the test of time that will make us realise who are really there for us and who will actually show up when we really need it.
Again you are so spot on when you say social media flashes by us like lightning speed. We might also see one thing online at one moment, and completely forget about what we saw the next moment and move on to the next notification. Wishes can indeed be mechanical, not just insincere but sort of programmed. It is lovely to hear that you like spending time with yourself on milestone occasions and reflect on your philosophies…and maybe even come up with more thoughts of wisdom.
今年的生日很平静，尼哈尔。这正是我喜欢的方式。多年来，我们赋予各种场合各种意义，宣传取代了隐私，我喜欢你的说法。有时候，我们在一个大型派对上，无论是我们自己的派对还是我们参加别人的派对，都会觉得自己无法控制。时间的考验会让我们意识到谁是真正在我们身边的人，谁会在我们真正需要的时候出现。
当你说社交媒体像闪电一样从我们身边闪过时，你是如此准确。我们可能在某一时刻在网上看到一件事，然后完全忘记我们上一时刻看到的东西，然后转到下一个网络通知。生日祝福有时候确实是机械的，不仅不真诚，而且有点程序化。很高兴听到你喜欢在重要的时刻花时间独处，反思你自己，甚至可能想出更多的想法。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
It was a quiet birthday this year, Nihar. Just the way I like it. So true that over the years we have attached meaning to occasions. Publicity takes over privacy…I like how you say it. Sometimes we feel like we have no control when we’re at a big party, be it our party or a party we go to. It is the test of time that will make us realise who are really there for us and who will actually show up when we really need it.
Again you are so spot on when you say social media flashes by us like lightning speed. We might also see one thing online at one moment, and completely forget about what we saw the next moment and move on to the next notification. Wishes can indeed be mechanical, not just insincere but sort of programmed. It is lovely to hear that you like spending time with yourself on milestone occasions and reflect on your philosophies…and maybe even come up with more thoughts of wisdom.
今年的生日很平静，尼哈尔。这正是我喜欢的方式。多年来，我们赋予各种场合各种意义，宣传取代了隐私，我喜欢你的说法。有时候，我们在一个大型派对上，无论是我们自己的派对还是我们参加别人的派对，都会觉得自己无法控制。时间的考验会让我们意识到谁是真正在我们身边的人，谁会在我们真正需要的时候出现。
当你说社交媒体像闪电一样从我们身边闪过时，你是如此准确。我们可能在某一时刻在网上看到一件事，然后完全忘记我们上一时刻看到的东西，然后转到下一个网络通知。生日祝福有时候确实是机械的，不仅不真诚，而且有点程序化。很高兴听到你喜欢在重要的时刻花时间独处，反思你自己，甚至可能想出更多的想法。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Nihar Pradhan
Indeed Mabel, with so much cacophony around us and so much of work at hand we are literally lost in the wilderness of disguised work. And we have became mechanically busy creatures and we are aping machines and we have managed to successfully do so, and have come close to behaving like machines and the classic irony is that machines have started imitating like human beings, and the role reversible is such an intriguing subject.
It so happens that we are forced into organising or joining a party on such occasions and at times it becomes asphyxiating and we desperately want the party to end and we want to come out and enjoy the true reflection with self, the quite moment and also being with very few close friends and spending a meaningful conversation…has much more to offer than the dance, music and the food in the party.
的确，梅布尔，我们周围有这么多不和谐的声音，手头有这么多工作，我们真的迷失在了伪装工作的荒野中。我们变成了机械忙碌的生物，我们在模仿机器，我们成功地做到了这一点，我们的行为已经接近于机器，最具讽刺意味的是，机器已经开始模仿人类了，角色可逆是一个非常有趣的课题。
在这种情况下，我们被迫组织或参加派对，有时它变得令人窒息，我们迫切地想要结束派对，我们想要享受自我的安静时刻，或者也可以和很少的亲密朋友在一起，进行一次有意义的对话……除了舞会上的舞蹈、音乐和食物之外，还有更多有意义的东西。
Indeed Mabel, with so much cacophony around us and so much of work at hand we are literally lost in the wilderness of disguised work. And we have became mechanically busy creatures and we are aping machines and we have managed to successfully do so, and have come close to behaving like machines and the classic irony is that machines have started imitating like human beings, and the role reversible is such an intriguing subject.
It so happens that we are forced into organising or joining a party on such occasions and at times it becomes asphyxiating and we desperately want the party to end and we want to come out and enjoy the true reflection with self, the quite moment and also being with very few close friends and spending a meaningful conversation…has much more to offer than the dance, music and the food in the party.
的确，梅布尔，我们周围有这么多不和谐的声音，手头有这么多工作，我们真的迷失在了伪装工作的荒野中。我们变成了机械忙碌的生物，我们在模仿机器，我们成功地做到了这一点，我们的行为已经接近于机器，最具讽刺意味的是，机器已经开始模仿人类了，角色可逆是一个非常有趣的课题。
在这种情况下，我们被迫组织或参加派对，有时它变得令人窒息，我们迫切地想要结束派对，我们想要享受自我的安静时刻，或者也可以和很少的亲密朋友在一起，进行一次有意义的对话……除了舞会上的舞蹈、音乐和食物之外，还有更多有意义的东西。
Mabel Kwong
Disguised work and disguised emotions are something that will inevitably hurt us all in the end. Machines can be useful to streamline tasks and make life easier. But that isn’t the best when it comes to human one-on-one interactions. As humans, we have emotions and that in itself is so unpredictable. The last thing many of us want is to be treated as a person to talk to because they are there for company and nothing more.
So true that reflection of self can have so much more to offer than a loud party. For extroverts, maybe they do prefer a party. But for the more low-key ones like you and I, reflection comes with the realisation of what’s important to us and what we really want. Sure, there will be food at a party but we can always bring our snacks to our own small and quiet get-togethers
伪装的工作和伪装的情绪最终都将不可避免地伤害我们所有人。机器可以用来简化任务，让生活更轻松。但当涉及到人类一对一的互动时，它并不是最好的。作为人类，我们有情感，而情感本身是不可预测的。我们许多人最不想要的就是被当作一个可以交谈的人，因为你被视为一个陪伴，仅此而已。
你说的很对，自我反省可以比热闹的派对提供更多的东西。对于外向的人来说，也许他们确实更喜欢聚会。但对于像你我这样比较低调的人来说，反思会让我们意识到什么对我们来说是重要的，我们真正想要的是什么。当然，聚会上会有吃的，但我们可以把零食带到自己安静的小聚会上。
Disguised work and disguised emotions are something that will inevitably hurt us all in the end. Machines can be useful to streamline tasks and make life easier. But that isn’t the best when it comes to human one-on-one interactions. As humans, we have emotions and that in itself is so unpredictable. The last thing many of us want is to be treated as a person to talk to because they are there for company and nothing more.
So true that reflection of self can have so much more to offer than a loud party. For extroverts, maybe they do prefer a party. But for the more low-key ones like you and I, reflection comes with the realisation of what’s important to us and what we really want. Sure, there will be food at a party but we can always bring our snacks to our own small and quiet get-togethers
伪装的工作和伪装的情绪最终都将不可避免地伤害我们所有人。机器可以用来简化任务，让生活更轻松。但当涉及到人类一对一的互动时，它并不是最好的。作为人类，我们有情感，而情感本身是不可预测的。我们许多人最不想要的就是被当作一个可以交谈的人，因为你被视为一个陪伴，仅此而已。
你说的很对，自我反省可以比热闹的派对提供更多的东西。对于外向的人来说，也许他们确实更喜欢聚会。但对于像你我这样比较低调的人来说，反思会让我们意识到什么对我们来说是重要的，我们真正想要的是什么。当然，聚会上会有吃的，但我们可以把零食带到自己安静的小聚会上。
Inside the Mind
I must say that all of your points are very valid. In fact, I feel the same way about the Christmas holidays.
There’s the pressure of decorating, organizing family events and of course money too spend for gifts.
I like my birthday because it’s my day and mine alone. I came from a family of 5. A birthday among so many was always a way to feel special. As an adult, I don’t feel that way now.
我必须说你所有的观点都很有道理。事实上，我对圣诞节也有同样的感觉。装修和组织家庭活动的压力很大，当然还需要花钱买礼物。我喜欢我的生日，因为这是我的日子，属于我一个人的日子。我来自一个五口之家。在这么多人当中过生日总是让人觉得很特别。但作为一个成年人，我现在没有那种感觉了。
I must say that all of your points are very valid. In fact, I feel the same way about the Christmas holidays.
There’s the pressure of decorating, organizing family events and of course money too spend for gifts.
I like my birthday because it’s my day and mine alone. I came from a family of 5. A birthday among so many was always a way to feel special. As an adult, I don’t feel that way now.
我必须说你所有的观点都很有道理。事实上，我对圣诞节也有同样的感觉。装修和组织家庭活动的压力很大，当然还需要花钱买礼物。我喜欢我的生日，因为这是我的日子，属于我一个人的日子。我来自一个五口之家。在这么多人当中过生日总是让人觉得很特别。但作为一个成年人，我现在没有那种感觉了。
Mabel Kwong
There certainly is quite a bit of pressure when it comes to organising a celebratory occasion, especially when you are the only one organising it – can be quite a lot of juggling from getting the food to inviting the guests. Lovely to hear you enjoy your birthday when you were younger..
组织一场庆祝活动当然会有相当大的压力，尤其是当你是唯一一个组织它的人的时候——从准备食物到邀请客人，有相当多的事情要做。很高兴听到你在你年轻时很享受你的生日。
There certainly is quite a bit of pressure when it comes to organising a celebratory occasion, especially when you are the only one organising it – can be quite a lot of juggling from getting the food to inviting the guests. Lovely to hear you enjoy your birthday when you were younger..
组织一场庆祝活动当然会有相当大的压力，尤其是当你是唯一一个组织它的人的时候——从准备食物到邀请客人，有相当多的事情要做。很高兴听到你在你年轻时很享受你的生日。
Val
I understand, though there have been times when I’ve hated and times when I’ve loved having people pay attention to my birthday. I’m heading into my late 60s now As a child, I adored all the birthday cards and presents I got from family and friends, and as the years have gone by those have decreased. I think I now get about three or four cards a year, that tells me how fast time is passing and I don’t like that aspect of it.
The year that my mother died, I just wanted everyone to forget my birthday. I couldn’t focus on anything other than having lost her.
我有时讨厌别人关注我的生日，但有时又喜欢别人关注我的生日。我现在快60岁了。小时候，我喜欢家人和朋友送给我的所有生日卡片和礼物，随着时间的流逝，这些东西越来越少。我想我现在每年会收到三到四张卡片，这告诉我时间过得有多快，我不喜欢这样。我母亲去世那年，我只想让所有人都忘了我的生日。失去她让我无法集中注意力。
I understand, though there have been times when I’ve hated and times when I’ve loved having people pay attention to my birthday. I’m heading into my late 60s now As a child, I adored all the birthday cards and presents I got from family and friends, and as the years have gone by those have decreased. I think I now get about three or four cards a year, that tells me how fast time is passing and I don’t like that aspect of it.
The year that my mother died, I just wanted everyone to forget my birthday. I couldn’t focus on anything other than having lost her.
我有时讨厌别人关注我的生日，但有时又喜欢别人关注我的生日。我现在快60岁了。小时候，我喜欢家人和朋友送给我的所有生日卡片和礼物，随着时间的流逝，这些东西越来越少。我想我现在每年会收到三到四张卡片，这告诉我时间过得有多快，我不喜欢这样。我母亲去世那年，我只想让所有人都忘了我的生日。失去她让我无法集中注意力。
Mabel Kwong
Your mother’s passing sounded like a challenging time, but I am sure you and her have many memories together. It is nice that you still receive some cards each year, and you must be important to quite a few people around you. I do think it is something special when others remember your birthday and existence – it’s like you are made to feel special and feeling special or spoilt is usually a nice feeling
你母亲的去世听起来是个挑战，但我相信你和她在一起时有很多回忆。很高兴你每年还能收到一些卡片，你对你周围的很多人来说一定很重要。我确实认为，当别人记住你的生日和你的存在时，这是一件特别的事情——就像你被赋予了特别的感觉，感觉自己很特别或被宠坏通常是一种很好的感觉
Your mother’s passing sounded like a challenging time, but I am sure you and her have many memories together. It is nice that you still receive some cards each year, and you must be important to quite a few people around you. I do think it is something special when others remember your birthday and existence – it’s like you are made to feel special and feeling special or spoilt is usually a nice feeling
你母亲的去世听起来是个挑战，但我相信你和她在一起时有很多回忆。很高兴你每年还能收到一些卡片，你对你周围的很多人来说一定很重要。我确实认为，当别人记住你的生日和你的存在时，这是一件特别的事情——就像你被赋予了特别的感觉，感觉自己很特别或被宠坏通常是一种很好的感觉
Hugh's Views and News
I’ve always disliked my birthday. I really don’t like all the fuss (which many seem to believe everyone should have), and I really dislike having ‘Happy Birthday’ being sung to me. It was fine when I was a child eating jelly and ice cream on my birthday, but not as I’ve got older. I don’t want to be reminded that I’m another year nearer by ‘best by’ date.
I’m kinda lucky in a way, as my birthday falls at Christmas time, so many people have their minds on other things, and not on my birthday. It sorta gets me off the hook. Also, usually when given a gift at Christmas, I’m told ‘this is your Christmas and birthday present.’ Doesn’t seem fair in a way, but I don’t mind.
我一直不喜欢我的生日。我真的不喜欢小题大做(许多人似乎认为每个人都应该这样)，我真的不喜欢有人给我唱生日快乐歌。当我还是个孩子的时候，在生日那天吃果冻和冰淇淋还可以，但随着年龄的增长就感觉不好了。我不想被提醒我离“最佳日期”又近了一年。
在某种程度上，我有点幸运，因为我的生日正好是在圣诞节，所以很多人都在想其他事情，而不会关注我的生日。它让我摆脱了困境。此外，通常在圣诞节收到礼物时，我被告知“这是你的圣诞和生日礼物”。在某种程度上似乎不公平，但我不介意。
I’ve always disliked my birthday. I really don’t like all the fuss (which many seem to believe everyone should have), and I really dislike having ‘Happy Birthday’ being sung to me. It was fine when I was a child eating jelly and ice cream on my birthday, but not as I’ve got older. I don’t want to be reminded that I’m another year nearer by ‘best by’ date.
I’m kinda lucky in a way, as my birthday falls at Christmas time, so many people have their minds on other things, and not on my birthday. It sorta gets me off the hook. Also, usually when given a gift at Christmas, I’m told ‘this is your Christmas and birthday present.’ Doesn’t seem fair in a way, but I don’t mind.
我一直不喜欢我的生日。我真的不喜欢小题大做(许多人似乎认为每个人都应该这样)，我真的不喜欢有人给我唱生日快乐歌。当我还是个孩子的时候，在生日那天吃果冻和冰淇淋还可以，但随着年龄的增长就感觉不好了。我不想被提醒我离“最佳日期”又近了一年。
在某种程度上，我有点幸运，因为我的生日正好是在圣诞节，所以很多人都在想其他事情，而不会关注我的生日。它让我摆脱了困境。此外，通常在圣诞节收到礼物时，我被告知“这是你的圣诞和生日礼物”。在某种程度上似乎不公平，但我不介意。
Mabel Kwong
Ah, eating jelly and ice-cream as a kid for your birthday. It sounded like a treat back then. I also had memories of eating jelly during my birthday when I was a kid – blue jelly that my mother made. As we get older, I don’t think many of us like to be reminded of our mortality, or the fact that things – what we have and people around us – come and go in life.
Sounds like Christmas time is a great cover for your birthday. You can hide behind all the festive attention and treats…and blend into the background like you want too
啊，小时候过生日吃果冻和冰淇淋。那时候听起来像是一种款待。我还记得小时候过生日时吃的果冻——我妈妈做的蓝色果冻。随着年龄的增长，我认为我们中的许多人都不愿意被提醒我们离死亡又近了一步，或者我们所拥有的东西和周围的人在生活中来来去去的事实。听起来圣诞节是你生日的一个很好的幌子。你可以躲在人们对节日的关注后面，像你想要的那样融入背景。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Ah, eating jelly and ice-cream as a kid for your birthday. It sounded like a treat back then. I also had memories of eating jelly during my birthday when I was a kid – blue jelly that my mother made. As we get older, I don’t think many of us like to be reminded of our mortality, or the fact that things – what we have and people around us – come and go in life.
Sounds like Christmas time is a great cover for your birthday. You can hide behind all the festive attention and treats…and blend into the background like you want too
啊，小时候过生日吃果冻和冰淇淋。那时候听起来像是一种款待。我还记得小时候过生日时吃的果冻——我妈妈做的蓝色果冻。随着年龄的增长，我认为我们中的许多人都不愿意被提醒我们离死亡又近了一步，或者我们所拥有的东西和周围的人在生活中来来去去的事实。听起来圣诞节是你生日的一个很好的幌子。你可以躲在人们对节日的关注后面，像你想要的那样融入背景。
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Forestwood
It seems that I have a lot of company in feeling self-conscious around birthday celebrations. They sometimes seem to me that others ring or wish you a Happy birthday out of so kind of duty, or social convention, and they are not always sincere. So, like many others, the way I celebrate birthdays is with one or two friends and in that way, I have a reason to have a social engagement once a week for many weeks. For me, it is a way to catch up with people I might not otherwise get to see. The birthday is not the focus, it is only the reason to initiate the meeting. My children’s birthday are a very special day for me too, as I gave birth to them on that day and my life was forever changed in a wonderful way from that day forward, for better or worse, and that is a reason to celebrate too. My children do NOT like a fuss on their birthday, one of them from as early as 2 years old, instructed me that the family was NOT to sing Happy Birthday – he has social anxiety!! I genuinely want to make a fuss for them and make their day super special, however, I have learnt to respect that they can spend it anyway they want, even NOT to acknowledge it at all.
似乎有很多人和我一样，在生日庆祝时感到不自在。在我看来，有时别人给你打电话或祝你生日快乐是出于某种责任或社会习俗，他们并不总是真诚的。所以，像许多人一样，我是和一两个朋友一起庆祝生日的，这样我就有理由每周参加一次社交活动。对我来说，这是一种与我可能无法见到的人见面的方式。生日不是重点，它只是发起会面的原因。我的孩子们的生日对我来说也是一个非常特别的日子，因为我在那天生下了他们，从那天起，我的生活永远地以一种美妙的方式改变了，无论是好是坏，这也是一个庆祝的理由。我的孩子们不喜欢在他们的生日庆祝活动中小题大做，我的一个孩子从2岁起就告诉我，家人不要唱生日快乐歌——他有社交焦虑症!!我真的很想为他们做点什么，让他们的生日特别一点，但是我学会了尊重他们想怎么过就怎么过，甚至根本不想过。
It seems that I have a lot of company in feeling self-conscious around birthday celebrations. They sometimes seem to me that others ring or wish you a Happy birthday out of so kind of duty, or social convention, and they are not always sincere. So, like many others, the way I celebrate birthdays is with one or two friends and in that way, I have a reason to have a social engagement once a week for many weeks. For me, it is a way to catch up with people I might not otherwise get to see. The birthday is not the focus, it is only the reason to initiate the meeting. My children’s birthday are a very special day for me too, as I gave birth to them on that day and my life was forever changed in a wonderful way from that day forward, for better or worse, and that is a reason to celebrate too. My children do NOT like a fuss on their birthday, one of them from as early as 2 years old, instructed me that the family was NOT to sing Happy Birthday – he has social anxiety!! I genuinely want to make a fuss for them and make their day super special, however, I have learnt to respect that they can spend it anyway they want, even NOT to acknowledge it at all.
似乎有很多人和我一样，在生日庆祝时感到不自在。在我看来，有时别人给你打电话或祝你生日快乐是出于某种责任或社会习俗，他们并不总是真诚的。所以，像许多人一样，我是和一两个朋友一起庆祝生日的，这样我就有理由每周参加一次社交活动。对我来说，这是一种与我可能无法见到的人见面的方式。生日不是重点，它只是发起会面的原因。我的孩子们的生日对我来说也是一个非常特别的日子，因为我在那天生下了他们，从那天起，我的生活永远地以一种美妙的方式改变了，无论是好是坏，这也是一个庆祝的理由。我的孩子们不喜欢在他们的生日庆祝活动中小题大做，我的一个孩子从2岁起就告诉我，家人不要唱生日快乐歌——他有社交焦虑症!!我真的很想为他们做点什么，让他们的生日特别一点，但是我学会了尊重他们想怎么过就怎么过，甚至根本不想过。
Mabel Kwong
‘kind of duty, or social convention, and they are not always sincere’. You summed up how I feel about birthdays, Amanda. But I do agree on you how a birthday or having a social convention a week is to meet people and catch up with them – that is maintaining connections. Life is always more interesting with others around, even for us who are introverts or with anxiety.
Your children sound like they know what they want, lol. It is nice of you to want to make them feel special on their special day and do so in your way that makes them comfortable – and I guess at the end of the day they appreciate it.
“一种责任或社会习俗，而且他们并不总是真诚的。”你总结了我对生日的看法，阿曼达。我同意你的观点，每周参加生日或社交聚会是为了结识新朋友，这是为了保持联系。有别人在身边，生活总是会更有趣，即使对我们这些内向或焦虑的人来说也是如此。
你的孩子听起来好像知道自己想要什么，哈哈。在他们特别的日子里，你想让他们感到特别，并以你的方式让他们感到舒服，这是很好的——我想在一天结束时，他们会感激你的。
‘kind of duty, or social convention, and they are not always sincere’. You summed up how I feel about birthdays, Amanda. But I do agree on you how a birthday or having a social convention a week is to meet people and catch up with them – that is maintaining connections. Life is always more interesting with others around, even for us who are introverts or with anxiety.
Your children sound like they know what they want, lol. It is nice of you to want to make them feel special on their special day and do so in your way that makes them comfortable – and I guess at the end of the day they appreciate it.
“一种责任或社会习俗，而且他们并不总是真诚的。”你总结了我对生日的看法，阿曼达。我同意你的观点，每周参加生日或社交聚会是为了结识新朋友，这是为了保持联系。有别人在身边，生活总是会更有趣，即使对我们这些内向或焦虑的人来说也是如此。
你的孩子听起来好像知道自己想要什么，哈哈。在他们特别的日子里，你想让他们感到特别，并以你的方式让他们感到舒服，这是很好的——我想在一天结束时，他们会感激你的。
farruca
I think many of your ideas about celebrating birthdays are very sound. I, too, believe that these Happy Birthday wishes are not always sincere. Very fine blog.
我认为你关于庆祝生日的许多想法都非常合理。我也认为，这些生日快乐的祝福并不总是真诚的。非常好的帖子。
I think many of your ideas about celebrating birthdays are very sound. I, too, believe that these Happy Birthday wishes are not always sincere. Very fine blog.
我认为你关于庆祝生日的许多想法都非常合理。我也认为，这些生日快乐的祝福并不总是真诚的。非常好的帖子。
Mabel Kwong
So hard to tell these days if birthday wishes are sincere. I suppose if you know the person well, then maybe.
这年头很难分辨生日祝福是否真诚。我想如果你对这个人很了解，那么也许你是对的。
So hard to tell these days if birthday wishes are sincere. I suppose if you know the person well, then maybe.
这年头很难分辨生日祝福是否真诚。我想如果你对这个人很了解，那么也许你是对的。
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