网帖翻译

I’ll get these,” I told my date cheerily, indicating the two glasses of wine we’d ordered at the bar. Medium glasses, I should add. Of house wine. From a standard – not gastro – pub. I would quickly come to regret making such a recklessly generous offer.

我来买单，"我高兴地对我的约会对象说，指了指我们刚在吧台点的两杯酒。我得补充说明，这两杯是中杯，自家酿造的普通葡萄酒。这是一家普通酒吧，而不是高级餐厅。很快，我就会为自己这个鲁莽慷慨的提议感到后悔。

“That’ll be £21,” said the barman – without the merest hint of a smile to suggest that this was his idea of a rather tasteless joke. It took every ounce of self-restraint not to gasp, hand fluttering to my chest, and shriek “I beg your pardon?” in a tone shrill enough to shatter glass. It was, after all, a first date. We were at least four rendezvous away from me feeling comfortable enough to become the physical manifestation of my mother.

酒保说：“总共21英镑。”脸上没有一丝笑容，完全没有表明这是他开的一个相当无趣的玩笑。我尽力克制自己没有把手捂到胸口深吸一口气尖叫道“你说什么？”，我相信我这尖叫声足以震碎玻璃杯。但毕竟，这只是我第一次约会。至少还需要四次约会，我才会觉得自在，完全展示出随我母亲的那种风格。

“Sure – £21? Of course. Right you are. No problem.”

“好的 21英镑？好的，给你钱。没问题。”

It was the week before payday. My brain stirred into action, firing off rapid strings of mental arithmetic: he would buy me back a drink, presumably, so we could stay for one more after this, but I probably couldn’t stretch to another round. I was supposed to be seeing an old friend for dinner the next night and was due to go on another first date the night after that. Should I cancel the other date? Or just put it all on the credit card? I could transfer some money from my savings, but I’d already done that the previous month, and the month before…

发薪日的前一周，我的大脑开始活跃起来，迅速进行一连串的心算：他应该会回请我一杯，这样我们还可以再喝一杯，但我大概不能再负担下一轮了。我原本打算第二天晚上和一位老朋友共进晚餐，再之后的晚上还有另一个第一次约会。我该取消另一个约会吗？还是干脆把所有开销都刷信用卡？我可以从储蓄里转些钱出来，但我已经在上个月和上上个月这样做了……

Talk about a buzz kill. Here I was, preoccupied by my bank balance, when I should have been focusing on making eye contact and charmingly frivolous conversation – laying down the romantic groundwork that would make dragging myself across town mid-week a genuinely worthwhile activity.

真是扫兴。我本该沉浸于眼神交流和充满魅力的轻松对话气氛当中，奠定浪漫的基础，让我在工作日中穿越整个城市来到这里变的值得，但现在我却在烦恼银行账户的余额。

“The cost of living crisis has had a huge effect on people in a multitude of ways, including how we spend our leisure time, and yes, even how we date,” says Thimbl’s financial expert, Alex Kosuth-Phillips. “People are more budget-savvy than ever, with more than half of UK adults admitting to spending less on non-essentials as a direct result of the increased cost of living.”

“生活成本危机对人们产生了多方面的巨大影响，包括我们如何度过闲暇时光，是的，甚至包括我们如何约会，”Thimbl 的金融专家亚历克斯-科苏斯-菲利普斯（Alex Kosuth-Phillips）说：“人们比以往任何时候都更加精打细算，一半以上的英国成年人承认，生活成本增加的直接后果是减少了非必需品的支出。”

Another survey from 2023 crunched the numbers on modern-day trysts to find that the majority of UK singles spent £60 per date – though for 13 per cent of respondents this could shoot up to over £100 for a first meeting. The research from Novuna Personal Finance revealed that the average person splashes a whopping £1,652 in total before finding a special someone, after an average of 15 dates. Despite the fact that, as per the Aqua research, people reported they could only afford an average of £38 per date. The numbers don’t add up.

2023 年的另一项调查对现代人的约会进行了统计，发现大多数英国单身男女的每次约会花费为 60 英镑，但有 13% 的受访者的第一次约会花费可能超过 100 英镑。Novuna 个人理财公司的调查显示，平均每个人在约会 15 次之后，总共花费高达 1652 英镑才能找到一个特别的人。大约经历15次约会。尽管根据Aqua的研究，人们报告说他们每次约会只能负担平均38英镑的花费。这些数字并不一致。

Whether it’s £100, £60 or £38, it’s still a hell of a lot to shell out on what is, let’s face it, more likely to be a letdown than a triumph. In simpler – read, cheaper – times, it was easy to chalk up a bad date to experience. Oh well. Better luck next time. These days, it’s hard not to start actively resenting them. It’s hard not to start calculating whether the conversational enjoyment to monetary spend ratio stacks up, at a point when you should be getting lost in the moment and losing track of time (an endeavour made all but impossible by the constant “ping” of banking app notifications informing you that the last round tipped you back into an unarranged overdraft). It’s hard not to start listening to the cynical voice in your head arguing, rather compellingly, that you’d probably have a much better evening hanging out with your mates. At least then the financial worries would be partially offset by a riotously enjoyable evening.

无论是100英镑、60英镑还是38英镑，这都是一笔巨款，而且坦白说，第一次约会更有可能是失望而不是成功。在更为简单也就是更便宜的过去，人们很容易把一次糟糕的约会当作经验教训。哦，好吧。下次好运。而如今，很难不对这些约会心生怨恨。很难不开始计算聊天乐趣与金钱花费的比例是否值得，在你本该沉浸在当下、忘记时间的时候（几乎被银行应用程序不断的“叮”声提醒你上一轮消费让你超支了所打断）。很难不去听从脑海中那个愤世嫉俗的声音，这个声音颇有说服力地告诉你，与朋友们一起度过的晚上可能会更愉快。至少那样，财务上的担忧会被一个热闹愉快的夜晚部分抵消。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

Then there are the costs incurred before you even get to the date part: the hundreds of pounds invested in prep, from new threads to haircuts, perfume and cologne to makeup. All of it splurged in the vain hope that, in time, this initial outlay might lead to you spending more money still – on lingerie. All these pre-date expenses can add another £40 per date, according to the Novuna survey.

还有在约会之前的花费：数百英镑的准备投资，从新衣服到发型，从香水和古龙水到化妆品。所有这一切的挥霍都是为了一个妄想，那就是随着时间的推移，最初的花费可能会让你花更多的钱--在内衣上。根据 Novuna 的调查，所有这些约会前的开销会让每次约会再增加 40 英镑。

In this economy? It’s enough to make you give up on the whole sorry business, take Hamlet’s advice and “get thee to a nunnery”.

在这种经济环境下？足以让人对糟糕的事情都感到绝望失去信心，照着哈姆雷特的建议去“到一个修道院去”。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

“Finances are at the forefront of people’s minds at the moment, and this is forcing people to be more thoughtful about how they connect with potential partners,” relationship expert and co-founder of dating app So Syncd, Jessica Alderson, agrees. “For some, this means being more sextive about who they date, and for others, this involves finding more creative, affordable ways to spend time with someone.”

“目前，财务问题是人们头脑中的首要考虑因素，这迫使人们更加深思如何与暧昧对象建立联系，”约会应用程序So Syncd的关系专家兼联合创始人Jessica Alderson表示同意。“对于一些人来说，这意味着更加谨慎地选择约会对象，而对于另一些人来说，这意味着寻找更具创意、更经济实惠的方式与他人共度时光。”
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

She also highlights that the cost of living crisis is “impacting people’s mental health and overall wellbeing. Some people don’t have the emotional energy or motivation to date in the midst of financial stress. It’s just not always a priority when you’re struggling to make ends meet.”

她还强调了生活成本危机对“人们的心理健康和整体幸福感的影响。一些人在财务压力下没有情感上的能量或动力去约会。当你勉力维持生计时，约会并不总是一个优先考虑的事情。”

What’s particularly unfair about all this is that being single itself comes at a price – there are strong financial incentives to date purely so you can get coupled up and cut costs. Single people are forced to spend an average of £9,298 more per year when they live alone. Dubbed the “singles tax”, this massive extra financial burden is, according to research from UK Debt Expert, comprised of paying for rent and bills, plus annual lifestyle outgoings such as weddings, car insurance, streaming services, Christmas, holidays and takeaways, all without a partner to share the load. With the average UK salary coming in at £34,963, the total singles tax could equal about 30 per cent of your take-home pay.

所有这些尤为不公平的地方在于，单身本身也是要付出代价的——这里存在一个强大的财务动机就是纯粹为了搭伙过日子而约会，从而降低生活成本。单身人士在独自生活时，被迫每年多花费约9298英镑。根据英国债务专家的研究，这被称为“单身税”，这种巨大的额外财务负担包括支付房租和账单，以及年度生活开支，如婚礼、汽车保险、流媒体服务、圣诞节、假期和外卖等，所有这些都没有伴侣来分担。由于英国的平均工资为34963英镑，单身税的总额可能相当于你的税后收入的约30%。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

“This premium that singles are having to pay leaves far less disposable income for other costs, like dating, socialising, owning a pet or attending a wedding; parts of modern life no one should feel they need to miss because of costs,” says Maxine McCreadie, personal finance expert at UK Debt Expert.

英国债务专家公司（UK Debt Expert）的个人理财专家玛克辛-麦克雷迪（Maxine McCreadie）说：“单身人士不得不支付的这笔保费，使得他们用于约会、社交、养宠物或参加婚礼等其他费用的可支配收入大大减少；没有人会认为自己会因为费用问题而错过现代生活中的某些部分。”

Under such circumstances, it perhaps makes sense that one in three couples are only staying together because they fear “not being able to afford to live alone”, according to Experian research. I don’t blame them, in all honesty. An extra £9k a year; a further £60 per date. When J Lo sang “My love don’t cost a thing”, she clearly wasn’t weathering an economic downturn.

在这种情况下，根据益百利公司（Experian）的调查，每三对夫妇中就有一对因为担心 “无法负担独居生活 ”而在一起，这也许是合情合理的。说实话，我并不怪他们。每年多花 9000 英镑；每次约会多花 60 英镑。当 J Lo 唱出 “我的爱不需要付出任何代价 ”时，她显然没有经历经济衰退。

So has the cost of living crisis killed romance stone dead? Not necessarily, but you might have to get a bit more creative with how you go about it. One of Alderson’s tips is to plan dates that involve free activities, such as visiting a local park or museum. “These types of activities not only save money but can also allow for more meaningful conversations,” she says. “A lot of people actually like simple dates such as going for a walk because it’s a low-pressure way to connect. Particularly if it’s a first date, and you’re not sure if you like each other yet, it can be refreshing to do something that doesn’t involve a major time or financial commitment.”

那么，生活成本危机是否已经让浪漫一去不复返了呢？不一定，但你可能需要在如何进行浪漫方面多一点创意。奥尔德森的建议之一是计划一些免费活动的约会，比如参观当地的公园或博物馆。“她说：“这类活动不仅省钱，还能让我们进行更有意义的交谈。“很多人其实喜欢散步这样简单的约会，因为这是一种低压力的沟通方式。特别是如果这是第一次约会，你们还不确定是否喜欢对方，做一些不需要投入大量时间或金钱的事情会让人耳目一新。”

Another “hack” is to look for deals online, advises Kosuth-Phillips: “There’s absolutely no shame in using cinema and restaurant discount codes to help towards the cost of an evening out. Additionally, don’t feel obliged to foot the entire bill. Regardless of your gender, you’re under no obligation to fund the whole outing.” One 2024 survey revealed that just 19 per cent of women believe that men should pay on a date. It is 2024, after all.

另一个 “秘诀 ”是在网上寻找优惠团购，Kosuth-Phillips 建议说： “使用电影院和餐馆的折扣代码来帮助支付晚上外出的费用绝对不是什么丢人的事。此外，不要觉得自己有义务承担全部费用。无论你的性别如何，你都没有义务为整个外出活动买单。” 2024 年的一项调查显示，只有 19% 的女性认为约会时应该由男性买单。毕竟现在是 2024 年。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处

And, if you’re later on in the dating journey with somebody, consider cooking a meal together at home instead of going out to eat. Not only is it more affordable, “it can also be a fun and intimate way to spend time together”, says Alderson. “Adding special touches like candles can make it feel like even more of an event than going out, but at a fraction of the cost. A movie night at home with homemade popcorn is another budget-friendly and cosy date idea.”

另外，如果你和某人约会的时间比较晚，可以考虑在家一起做饭，而不是出去吃。奥尔德森说："这不仅更经济实惠，也是一种有趣而亲密的共处方式。添加蜡烛等特殊装饰会让人感觉比外出就餐更像一场活动，但成本却很低。在家看电影、吃自制爆米花是另一种经济实惠又温馨的约会方式。”

原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处